A Depressed Kendo Player Possesses a Bastard Aristocrat

Chapter 1: What is the meaning of this...

Chapter 1: What is the meaning of this...

What is the meaning of this...

The golden sunset that illuminated the world had set.

It was the time of day when only darkness remained, coveting the faint remnants of the sun.

I stood there, gazing at the sky where the curtain of night had fallen.

*Woooo...*

The passing winter wind caressed my cheeks.

I had to shiver for a moment because of the surging chill.

My legs, suspended in the air, trembled slightly.

As I took a moment to catch my breath and drive away the chill, the city's nightscape came into view through my hazy breath.

Countless lights dancing beautifully.

Countless people dancing joyfully within them.

For a moment, I felt a wave of complex emotions and stared blankly at the scenery, imprinting it in my eyes.

"......"

This scenery was now my last.

Thinking that way, I felt a strange feeling.

Of course, it must be a mistake.

Emotions had already been erased from me a long time ago.

I lowered my head slightly and looked down at my feet.

The vast, empty space stretched out before me as if mocking me.

'.....If I fall from here, I can die at once.'

A 20-story high-rise building.

Despite this being my first time coming up to such a place, my heart was strangely numb.

No, it felt rather comfortable.

"It's really over now...."

It was a feeling of relief.

As much as the strong wind that embraced me.

Staggering for a moment at the dizzyingly high scenery, I took a long breath and closed my eyes.

Memories of past times flashed briefly through my calming vision.

"......"

My life was like a single sword.

A sword sharpened to the limit, emitting a dangerous radiance.

Not knowing emotions.

Having no ego.

A doll living every day in harsh training and schedules.

It was my father who pushed me into such a life.

-Be the best, if you are my son.

The day I turned twelve.

That's what my father said.

A former world-class Kendo athlete, he wanted me, his son, to reach the top as well.

It was the common greed of a parent.

...But there were many distorted parts to dismiss it as such.

Beatings that followed every mistake.

Abuse committed in the name of training.

Cold, harsh words that flew at me every time I collapsed from exhaustion.

My father threw me into pain in various ways.

-You're pathetic... You can't even do this much.

Every day was hell.

I thought about dying dozens of times a day.

I endured the schedule, consumed by self-loathing and despair.

But even in such a life, I persevered.

I lived.

I thought everything my father did to me was for me.

Because my father loves me.

My father does this because he loves me.

I comforted myself by repeating that over and over again.

'If I become the best in the world, my father will smile at me again...?'

With that one thought, I endured hell.

Carving myself, cutting myself, torturing myself.

I embraced hope, longing for the smile that would one day grace my father's lips.

However.

It didn't take long for me to realize that it was just my delusion.

Selected as the best Kendo athlete in the Republic of Korea, I proudly joined the national team and headed towards the world championships.

There was no such thing as an opponent.

Compared to the times I had endured, my opponents were too soft and lukewarm.

So I won consecutive matches, little by little.

I desperately reached out for the shimmering goal that seemed both within reach and out of reach.

And after overcoming all the hurdles, I reached the final of the World Championships.

Until I stood in the arena, I was filled with joy.

'Finally, I can repay my father's love for me.'

With a faint smile, I stepped onto the final stage.

My heart pounded as I thought that the 10-year dream I had held since I was 12 years old had come true.

The dream I poured everything into.

The dream I had pursued only for my father.

On the final stage to put an end to that dream.

.....I was utterly defeated.

Without even landing a single blow on my opponent.

I lost with an unbelievable score of 10 to 0.

-Good game. I look forward to seeing more good performances from you in the future.

I remember the look in my opponent's eyes as he shook my hand after the match.

A look of pity, as if looking down at a being infinitely weaker than himself.

It felt like my entire life had been negated.

But.

My misfortune didn't end there.

I stumbled into the locker room, forgetting to even take off my helmet after the match.

Waiting for me there was my father, staring at me with contemptuous eyes.

He remained silent for a while, then finally uttered a single sentence.

-I don't understand.

A voice devoid of even a shred of warmth, as if evaluating an object.

With those words, my father left the locker room.

I reflexively reached out toward his retreating figure.

But I couldn't reach him.

He didn't look back at me even once as he walked down the hallway.

I muttered in empty despair, looking at the emptiness before me.

Why...

Why are you leaving?

I dreamed of you for 10 years.

I lived for your greed for 10 years.

Why am I being abandoned so miserably now...?

'I believed that you loved me.'

It was all my misunderstanding.

My father didn't love me.

I collapsed, staring at his cold back.

I sat there blankly, shedding tears.

I had lived half my life only for my father.

I realized too late that it was a false delusion.

My life had been denied.

Everything I had done had been meaningless.

I felt like an arrow that had lost its direction.

I wanted to let go of everything.

I wanted to disappear.

So I climbed the stairs.

And now I stood here.

".....It's okay, really."

I muttered in a pathetic voice as if to comfort myself.

Contradictory emotions, both fear and anticipation, overflowed with my pounding heart.

[World's No. 2 Kendo Athlete, National Team Member, Commits Suicide by Jumping from a Building...]

[Reportedly Suffering from Depression, Shock....]

Perhaps tomorrow morning, articles like these would adorn a section of the newspaper.

Having fallen to death from a time filled with lies and delusions, I would be erased from the world along with people's meager pity.

"......"

I quietly let go of the hand that was holding onto the railing.

My precariously perched body was thrown into the air.

A terrifying sense of speed and a comforting sense of buoyancy enveloped me.

The rapidly approaching ground came into view in my swirling vision.

I quietly closed my eyes.

And I prayed.

Please don't let it hurt.

And let this be the end of everything.

'Still, I'm a little scared...'

-Thud!!

That was my end.

All I remember was the loud impact that struck my ears along with the intense shock.

.

.

.

Yes.

I definitely died like that.

-Ding!

[You have possessed 'Raiden Lishite', the eldest son of the Lishite Dukedom!]

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What is the meaning of this...