A Wish to Grab Happiness

Volume 7, Chapter 177: The Will to Live

Volume 7, Chapter 180: The Hand of Salvation

Her field of vision swayed vaguely. Her eyes could not focus. Moreover, her body felt strangely warm. Ariene blinked her golden eyes as she looked up at the ceiling. The ceiling was also swaying, much like the rest of her view. What a strange occurrence.

When she got up slowly, she could see a fine blanket covering her body. “I see. That’s why my body feels warm. Not only that, the place where I am lying down has the softness of a bed.”

“I wonder what this is all about.” The softness that wrapped her body made her want to leave all her weight behind. A very soothing feeling.

Her eyelids were still heavy. She even felt as if the power of her body had been taken away.

Suddenly, her body shook intermittently and the noise surrounding her became louder.

“I see. This is a carriage. It seems this carriage was well prepared for me.”

Ariene’s golden eyes flickered and she asked herself some questions. “Why am I on this mysterious carriage? Why is my consciousness strangely ambiguous?”

“Yes, I got on the carriage. That sight is clear in my head. However, the process leading up to that point has completely vanished from my memory. I have no reason to ride a carriage in the first place.”

While being shaken by the carriage, Ariene realized it was difficult to tell whether it was a dream or a reality. Her eyelids felt heavy.

Ariene tried to force her eyelids to open. Then, she glanced at the surroundings for a moment. There was no one beside her in the carriage. Only Ariene’s body swayed inside the carriage’s private room. Perhaps, there was only one coachman pulling the carriage, and no one else.

“After all, it was a dream.”

After Ariene reached that conclusion in her chest, she closed her eyes and laid back in the carriage seat. The feel on her back was both soft and comfortable.

“…I felt that Lugis was near me. Yes, so close to me that our breaths could overlap with one and another.”

“Was that a dream? Certainly, even if I searched in my memory, that scene is so vague as if there is a haze in my skull. All that remains is a slight feel in my eyes and ears.”

Something kept burning in Ariene’s eyes. A sight where she almost hugged Lugis, who stood by her side. Then, a voice echoed in the back of her ears.

…The woman I fell in love with…

The moment those words echoed in Ariene’s ears and stimulated her thoughts, her closed eyelids opened suddenly. Her throat became tight as her golden hair shook inside the carriage.

“No, that was not a dream.”

As soon as Ariene realized her mistake, her cheeks began to burn like fever. Her eyes moisturized immediately. Yes, surely Lugis was talking to someone during that time. However, Ariene’s memory could not trace to who it was. The inside of her brain was vague, and her memory was like a cloud. It felt as if someone had taken away her body and consciousness.

Ariene only remembered one thing. Lugis’ eyes when he spoke those words were undoubtedly intense.

She unknowingly hid her face with a blanket. Hot, hot, extremely hot. She pulled a thread of memory in her skull for countless of times, wondering if it was true or not.

Ariene was sure that she had a face she could not show to anyone right now. A severe tension covered her whole body and her face even had a strange fervor. Yet, her lips quivered, expressing joy. An expression which she never shown to other people before.

She kept remembering and remembering without stopping.

“I thought that he had entrusted himself to the Heraldic religion and forgot all about me. I thought he wanted to seek salvation from others. But it’s not true. It’s different. Lugis is waiting for me. He has been looking for me all this time.”

Ariene’s chest swayed with joy just because of that fact. Her fingertips squeezed the blanket even harder than before. A great bliss traveled down her spine, and tremors spread throughout her body.

“…Oh, I knew it. After all, the one who Lugis wants for himself must be me, the only one who can give him salvation.”

That refreshing conviction covered Ariene’s chest. Above all, she felt extremely pleased about that reality.

At the same time. A new graceful revelation emerged in the depths of Ariene’s brain, at the source of her thoughts, as if pointing the right way.

A revelation from God. A written description of the path for the Saint. It came to her mind easily, just as it used to be back in the Cathedral.

Ariene could not remember the details that much because of the carriage’s movements. But she clearly understood the revelation as a whole. Her memories within her settled as if the revelation guided her. It claimed to be the right path, saying that nothing was wrong.

The destination of the revelation was a journey away from Belfein.

Ariene’s golden eyes narrowed. The fever was exhaling from her eyes. “Being away from Belfein means being away from Lugis.” Ariene wanted to give him her hands as soon as possible.

However, Ariene took deep breaths for a few times. And in blink of an eye, the inside of her skull regained a little quietness.

“Indeed, if possible, I would like to return to Belfein and take Lugis’ hands with my own hands. But that’s not an option right now. I cannot be short-sighted.”

“Lugis is now trying to reach a false salvation. A distorted salvation called Heraldic Order. Of course, it cannot be helped. At least for now. Even if he has been waiting for me, he is still inclined to reach something else. He is a human being after all. It’s only a matter of time.”

Ariene knew the most important thing was to make sure that Lugis never leaned on anything else but her. To separate him from everything else. For that purpose, making a little detour was unavoidable. She was now heading outside of Belfein. There was nothing else she could do except follow the path provided by God.

In other words, to follow the revelation now. Ariene firmly believed that getting closer to the status of Saint was getting closer to Lugis’ salvation.

Yes, Ariene muttered in the depths of her heart, as if her emotions floated in her chest. It was not something that appeared in her heart without meaning. She clearly knew how to feel and what to do. Words emerged unconsciously in her brain and then sank into the depths of her chest again.

“…Yes, that’s right. Only I can give him salvation. Even God does not have that right.”