Ascension of the Monster Queen

Chapter 162: The guilt

Zilrud was relieved to see Urul getting along well with Nessa and the others, but as he was about to leave, his child jumped out of his arm and ran towards Nessa.

"Lady Nessa," Zilrud called out, and she smiled when she saw then before grabbing the child and lifting him up in her arms.

"Hello," She said before patting him on the head and he laughed as Zilrud sighed before smiling.

"Seems like he wants to play, Zilrud," She said before handing him the child which he collected.

"Yes, I know, and I'm really tired or I would have played with him, but for now I'm going to take him home to sleep, good night lady Nessa, I hope you get a good night's rest as well," He replied and she smiled.

"I will, thanks and good night to both of you, sleep well," She said and the kid smiled before leaving with his father.

Nessa turned her attention back to Urul, who appeared depressed. Nessa knew it was because of the recent events and that he was still feeling guilty about everything that had happened, and she also knew that it was natural for him to feel that way.

She approached Urul and sat before him as he lowered his head, and she looked at the others, who smiled.

"What's the matter, Urul?" Yanka inquired, and Urul sighed.

"I have a feeling that all of those lives could have been saved if only..." He responded, and Nessa lowered her head, understanding how he felt, but knew that the feeling would break him down if he didn't let go of what had happened and stop blaming himself.

"Urul, listen to me, I told you, none of this is your fault, there was nothing more that you could have done when your opponent was stronger than you, you didn't lead those Orcs that died to doom, none of this is your fault, what you are feeling is guilt."

"You wanted to save them, but in the end, you ended up following orders and leading them alongside your father, there was nothing you could have done to help them, you didn't make a choice there, you were forced to do so by the one controlling you, you have to stop feeling guilty for something you didn't do, if you don't let go, you won't be able to move forward and I know it's not easy but you have to," She said as he looked at her.

"She is right, Urul, guilt is a terrible thing; if you feel it for too long, it will rip you apart from the inside, bit by bit," Riki added, and Yanka nodded.

"You are allowing the evil that killed your friends to win by constantly feeling feeling guilty for something you shouldn't be feeling guilty about in the first place; if you continue down that path, you will fall and become weak, and you won't be able to protect those you care about if something like that happens again," Nessa said, and Urul's eyes widened as he stared at her.

"I know because I speak from experience, Urul, don't let it destroy you," She replied as the others exchanged glances before looking at her, wondering what Nessa was talking about.

"Lady Nessa, thank you; I will do my best; and thank you guys as well," Urul said, and they all smiled at him.

"You're welcome," They replied, before Nessa patted him on the shoulder and he exhaled deeply before getting up.

"Good night to all of you," He said with a bow.

"Good night, Urul," They replied before he left, and they looked at Nessa as she finished her food and poured herself a glass of drink, which she drank while thinking about her parents and the accident they were in.

Riki tapped Nessa on the shoulder after noticing she appeared to be lost, and she looked at him.

"What is it?" She asked.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, I am fine, why wouldn't I be?" She asked.

"You seemed a little lost just now, and from the way you talked to Urul just now, it really seems..." Riki responded and she smiled.

"Don't worry, I'm fine; I was just thinking about something from my past, something I don't like thinking about, knowing that.... It doesn't matter; the past is in the past and it's best if it stays there; anyway, I'm tired; thank you for the meal; I'm going to bed now; good night, guys," She said.

"Good night," They replied, before she left with a sigh and they exchanged glances.

"What was that about?" Liya asked and Riki sighed.

"I don't know, but it would seem to me that she has a lot of her past to deal with and it's troubling her, more than we know," Riki responded.

"Maybe we can help her," Dalia said.

"Yes, just maybe, but only if she lets us help her, she isn't telling us everything about her past and we can't force her, when the time is right and she feels like she is ready, she will tell us more about her past, best not to push fire sweetheart," Riki replied, and Dalia glanced at Liya who nodded and she sighed.

"She must have had it hard because whenever she speaks about he past, I remembered her saying she had to learn a lot of things in order to create a good life for herself, was she alone?" Dalia asked and Liya lowered her head.

"Maybe or maybe not, you won't know if you don't ask but I will go with Riki on this, let her tell you in her own time, brining up the past can be both a good thing and a bad thing, it's fragile, but you kids already know that, so don't force things no matter what," Yanka responded and they smiled at him.

"Got it, Yanka, we won't, don't worry, also I am getting tired, let's head to bed, we still have a lot to do tomorrow and lady Nessa has a lot she wants to take care of as well, so good night," Dalia said and they smiled.

"Good night," They replied then went to their homes to call it a night.