Be Gentle, Immortal Master

Chapter 146 - Should I Be Jealous?

At least Xie Lun and I didn't get disqualified from the tournament. The rest of that round passed in peace, though I kept feeling too distracted to focus on the task, and somehow it appeared that Xie Lun was the same way. We didn't get too many good prizes in the end, but I didn't care. The first thing I wanted to do as soon as everything was over was to find Bai Ye and make sure that he really was alright. Not because I didn't trust his ability … but mostly because of that look Teng Yuan kept giving us.

What did Teng Yuan know that I didn't? It must be related to Twin Stars. I still remembered the expression on his face when his eyes landed on those swords the first day I met him. It was the same expression he and the Gatekeeper had every time Bai Ye promised them that Twin Stars no longer held the power it used to have. An expression that I never understood. Given all the havoc Twin Stars had wreaked in the past, why was there no judgment and grudge in the way they look at Bai Ye at all? Why did there seem to be more guilt and pity instead?

I glanced at the swords on my belt. Wondering if they would still manage to bring me last-minute surprises before getting locked away, I knocked on Bai Ye's door.

It took a while for him to answer it, likely because it was his meditation time again. Maybe that was the sign of getting close to a breakthrough—his meditation sessions had grown not only longer but also more frequent these days, and I had probably just interrupted him. Words of apology were already on my tongue when the door opened, but the moment I saw him, those words were suddenly replaced by worry.

He looked pale. The smile on his face was bright and warm as always, but as much as he tried to hide it, I didn't miss the exhaustion in his eyes. "Bai Ye?" I clutched his hand almost by instinct. "Are you not feeling well?"

He blinked, then poked his head out of the door and looked around us. When he confirmed there was no one else around, he pulled me inside and shut the door behind us. "I can't put up the barrier spell when you're outside." He rubbed my head. "Be more careful next time."

But I was too preoccupied with other thoughts to think about being careful. "What happened?" I persisted. "It's only been a couple of days … How did you grow so pale? Were you hurt in that challenge against the Jade Temple Keeper?"

He blinked again. "Pale?" Then he laughed. "It must be the lighting in the hallway. Their Keeper doesn't have enough power to hurt me, Qing-er. You should have that much faith in your master."

I stared at him, about to argue when I noticed that the paleness did seem to be gone from his face now. Was it really a trick of the light? "But he was mostly even with you until the end—"

"You heard the Gatekeeper say I was holding back." He cut me off, tugging me over to sit down. "Let's not talk about those unpleasant people. They deserve much worse for putting you in harm's way. If only I had more time to deal with them …"

I studied him again carefully. After making sure once more that he indeed looked alright, I let out a breath and chuckled. "But I'm fine. You were saving me through the illusions, weren't you? They couldn't have hurt me."

He smiled, raising a hand to smooth out my wind-tousled hair. "They might have if I was a second too slow, or if Twin Stars didn't come to your rescue. Maybe you should reconsider keeping Twin Stars by your side."

What Xie Lun said to me earlier suddenly came back to my mind. Did I really need Twin Stars to stay safe? Were there no other ways to make myself stronger? I hesitated, though I decided against asking Bai Ye. Every minute we had before his retreat was precious now, and I didn't want to waste it on questioning him more about these swords that already brought us enough trouble. "You told the Gatekeeper you are locking them away," I said. "I don't want to have to explain to him why that didn't end up happening. Besides, I don't need Twin Stars. You'll keep me safe."

His gaze lingered on a loose strand of my hair. "I can't protect you forever, Qing-er," he said softly, tucking that strand behind my ear. "Someday, you'll need to be able to defend yourself."

"Will you be on retreat for that long?" I asked, puzzled by the wistfulness in his tone.

"Not just during the retreat … There will always be times when I can't follow you everywhere, after all." He paused for a moment. "I've been watching both rounds of the tournament closely. Xie Lun seems like a trustworthy friend. If you're ever in a difficult situation while I'm away, I'm sure he will try his best to help."

I raised an eyebrow. "You won't be jealous if I ask him for help?" I asked, half joking and half serious. Bai Ye had always worn somewhat of a strange expression every time he mentioned Xie Lun. "He did claim that he wanted to pursue a celibate path," I added, "but who knows, what if he changes his mind?"

Bai Ye chuckled. "That's for you to tell me, Qing-er. Should I be jealous?"

I couldn't tell if he had also meant the question as a joke, but I looked him straight in the eye as seriously as I could. "No," I said and cupped his cheeks. "I told you before, no one could ever make me leave you. And I meant every word."

The look in his eyes was tender and loving, but for some reason, I thought I caught a glimpse of that mysterious wisp of sorrow again.. Then he closed his eyes, and a light kiss landed on my lips.