First Contact

Chapter 609



Chapter 609: Interlude

>LEEBAW.SUPERUSER HAD LOGGED ON


>LEEBAW.SUPERUSER TITLED LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


>LEEBAW.SUPERUSER HAS ENTERED 'GESTALT GENERAL CHAT'


>


...


...


...


LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


Hello! Where is everyone?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


...


...


...


LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


HELLO!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS HAS ENTERED THE CHAT ROOM


AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


Hey!


>looks around


Uh, where is everyone?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


I don't...


!!RAWR I'M A TERRAN HIDING UNDER A BEDSHEET WITH TOO MANY HOLES CUT IN IT RAWR!!


Hey, guys!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


AAAAAAHHHH!


What the hell, Trea?


Why are you wearing a sheet covered in holes?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


!!OOOOH! SPOOKY ZOMBIE SECOND EATMU WAR SOLDIER OOOOH!!


Hey! Are they out there.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


LEEBAW> SCREAMS


AKLTAK> SCREAMS


!!CYBERNETIC MAR-GITE WITH GOOGLY-EYES EATING A DONUT!!


Hey, there they are!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


LEEBAW> SCREAMS


AKLTAK> SCREAMS


LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


WHAT IS GOING ON? WHO ARE ALL OF YOU?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


!!RAWR I'M A TERRAN HIDING UNDER A BEDSHEET WITH HOLES CUT IN IT RAWR!!


Oh, sorry. We're in costume. Hang on.


>!!RAWR I'M A TERRAN HIDING UNDER A BEDSHEET WITH TOO MANY HOLES CUT IN IT RAWR!! has been renamed TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


>!!OOOOH! SPOOKY ZOMBIE SECOND EATMU WAR SOLDIER OOOOH!! has been renamed CONFEDMIL


>!!CYBERNETIC MAR-GITE WITH GOOGLY-EYES EATING A DONUT!! has been renamed RIGELLIAN SAURIAN COMPACT


There, that better?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


But... but... why?


Why use those headers and those horrible avatar skins to


!!VIOLENT SPORTS FACIAL ARMOR WEARING BACKWOODS MASS MURDERER WITH MOMMY ISSUES!!


It's almost back on!


LEEBAW> SCREAMS


AKLTAK> SCREAMS


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


WHY? WHY? OH, THIS IS TERRIBLE!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


Look, come on. Follow us. Confed, can you hold the door open?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


CONFEDMIL


Sure.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


Um, where are we going?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


CONFEDMIL


Somewhere frightening, children.


Very frightening.


CONFEDMIL> Laughs spookily


AKLTAK shivers


All right, go up and touch the little festive holiday gourd.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


Wow, how did I miss a big door surrounded by flashing lights with a festive gourd painted on it.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


I don't know... it looks kind of suspicious to me.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


Quit being a sissy and come on.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


TREA has left the chat room


RIGEL has left the chat room


AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


All right...


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


AKL has left the chat room


LEE has left the chat room


CONFEDMIL has left the chat room


WELCOME TO THE SPOOKY ROOM!


DON'T TOUCH THE FESTIVE HOLIDAY GOURD, TREA CARVED IT!


>>LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


Why is everyone wearing those terrible costumes?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


>>VIOLENT SPORTS FACIAL ARMOR WEARING BACKWOODS MASS MURDERER WITH MOMMY ISSUES


It's Free Candy & Scary Costumes time!


Come sit with me next to this festive holiday gourd I carved!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>RIGELLIAN SAURIAN COMPACT


>>MAGICAL GIRL IN A SPARKLING DRESS WITH A SNOWMAN SIDEKICK WHO DOESN'T GET COLD


Don't step on the gourd guts. We're picking out the seeds to dry them out.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


Ewwww...


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>HESSTLA CYBERBURROW


>>WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW I AM THE HAMBURGER KING!


Oh! Oh! It's almost back!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


>>RAWR I'M A TERRAN HIDING UNDER A BEDSHEET WITH TOO MANY HOLES CUT IN IT RAWR


>munches popcorn


Here some the scary part!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


WE NOW RETURN TO OUR HOLIDAY SPECIAL


"Engines nominal, Control," Colonel John Padwicken said, feeling sweat bead up on his face. He could see a slight color shift on the stars outside the heavy crysteel windows. He glanced to the side at Major Nupta, who nodded slightly, sweat gleaming on her brown skin.


"Engage primary engine linkage," the order took nearly twenty seconds to reach the UESPV (United Earth Space Program Vessel) John Hamilton from Buenos Aires UN Space Control.


Col Padwicken reached forward, flipping up the macroplas shield. He flipped each toggle, calling it out.


On Toggle Five a low, steady vibration could be felt. Not on the seat, not vibrating the ship itself, but making his bone marrow vibrate.


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


I can't watch this part!


>>MANTID hides her face


"Primary Engine Linkage engaged," Col Padwicken said. He reached out and grabbed the handle, a simple grip connected to two bars with only two settings. Forward, for on, back for off. It was currently in the back setting.


"Active Primary Engine," came the order after nearly twenty seconds.


Colonel Padwicken pushed the lever forward.


Everything tunneled down, the hull seeming to crinkle inwards in geometric patterns even as the crysteel windows flexed and bent along right angle with impossible geometry such as twelve perpendicular red lines of flexing glass done in blue glitter ink. The stars shattered into pinwheels of sparkling lights.


>>LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


>>NO COSTUME ASSIGNED


Is that... is that...


UNSHIELDED JUMP SPACE?


>>screams and hides under chair


Major Nupta screamed/giggled/laughed/cried/sang the Nipwicken Cartoon themesong/played a guitar/jumped up and down on an accordion played by a screaming mime. Colonel Padwicken heard Captain Barvettiel howl like a dog from the engineering station.


>>TELKAN FORGE WORLDS


>>I AM HERE TO AUDIT YOUR INCOME AND EXPENSES DO NOT BOTHER TO RUN


>>Screams in terror


>>AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


>>NO COSTUME ASSIGNED


>>shrieks in fear


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


>>PSYCHOTIC MURDERING LEMUR WITH A HOOK FOR A HAND


>>hides under couch


Everything came back in a sudden jerk.


Neptune sat silently off to the right of the crysteel windows, the banding silent and holding its secrets as it had for millions of years.


Colonel Padwicken blinked the frozen amber off his eyelashes and looked at the instruments.


"Control, this is John Hamilton," Colonel Padwicken said. "Jump successful."


Neptune sat, encircled by its rings, undisturbed by industry or technology, as pure and simple as it had been for millions of years. The bands slowly shifted and turned as the credits began to flow up.


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


OK, that was the most horrifying movie we've watched.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


Is it over?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


Yeah, it's over, sis. You can look.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


>breathes a sigh of relief


That part terrifies me.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


Did... did they do a jumpspace translation, in-system, exiting inside the resonance zone, without jumpspace shielding?


But... but...


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


ALL> That's impossible!


ALL> Laughs


>>AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


That's... that's terrifying to even think about.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>RIGELLIAN SAURIAN COMPACT


It was their first superluminal test flight that was a success.


Wanna hear the real scary part?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL


Brrr... OK


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>RIGELLIAN SAURIAN COMPACT


They did it with standard programming. No AI's, no VI's, just straight programming on computers less powerful that a pocket vidphone has now. Metal over silicon circuitry on the ship, no a bit of quantum computing or molecular circuitry to be found.


>>TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


AND A NUCLEAR FISSION REACTOR!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


And a nuclear fission reactor.


Thanks for stealing the punchline.


Jerk.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


Wait, that was their first superluminal flight?


But I thought they'd been to two nearby stellar systems.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


They had been. They'd used slow-ships. Max speed they got up to was like .22C.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TELKAN FORGE WORLDS


The Madness of the Lemurs.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


OK, enough. Enough.


What scary movie do you want to watch next?


You all know what I want to watch.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TELKAN FORGE WORLDS


What do you want to watch?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>DIGITAL ARTIFICIAL SENTIENCE SYSTEMS


>>BEHOLD MY MIGHTY SYSTEM OF ORGANS


What he always wants to watch.


One of the P'Thok specials.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


How many P'Thok specials are there?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


A lot. Like, two dozen or so per holiday, including P'Thok and Charlie Moomoo Save Singing Duck Day that came out last year.


To say the Treana'ad got culture cracked is an understatement.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>LANAKTALLAN FREE HERD


>>QUAKE IN FEAR AT MY MASK OF A MAGIC USING DISFIGURED GREEN SKINNED TERRAN FEMALE LEMUR


As bad as us?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


We all got culture cracked as bad as you did.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>RIGELLIAN SAURIAN COMPACT


Pfft, not us.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


One word.


Tits.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>RIGELLIAN SAURIAN COMPACT


LOL Ok, you got us there.


Why is it that many of those illustrations where our females have mammalian mammaries so aesthetically pleasing?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>DIGITAL ARTIFICIAL SENTIENCE SYSTEMS


It's hard to explain, but... um... boobs?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


ALL> LOL


>>PUBVIAN DOMINION


>>BEHOLD! I AM DRESSED AS A DECAPITATED MANTID OMNIQUEEN WITH A MISSING EYE


Seriously, what should we watch now?


Are we really going to watch a P'Thok special again?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WOLDS


WAIT!


Two of us aren't in costume.


If we don't want the giant malevolent carved festive holiday gourd to visit us and devour us all, they have to put on costumes.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>LEEBAW CONTEMPLATIVE POOL


Fine.


Wow, there's a lot of them.


How do we know which one we want to wear?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


Just grab something you like.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>LEEBAW CONTEMPLATION POOL HAS MADE >>NINE HUNDRED FOOT TALL LANAKTALLAN EXECUTOR WITH BLOODY JAWS POINTING AND MOCKING


>>LANAKTALLAN FREE HERD


>>Screams


Wow, good one. That's scary!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS--


>>AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS HAS MADE >>BLOODY EYE SOCKET ZOMBIE NAMTOTUN PLANETARY DIRECTOR FOR LIFE


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


Oh, nice one. That's chilling.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS--


>>AKLTAK SOARING WORLDS


Come on, pick something.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TREANA'AD HIVE WORLDS


P'Thok! P'Thok! P'THOK! P'THOK!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>RIGELLIAN SAURIAN COMPACT


We know. We get it. We get the picture.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>LANAKTALLAN FREE HERD


This is actually fun. I had thought it was some kind of mental aberration to watch media designed to frighten, horrify, and gross out the viewer, but lemur scary movies are actually exciting.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


Yeah, weirdly enough, it is really fun.


Hey, let's watch Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat-Girl XXII!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


Ugh. Really? Why do you like those so much?


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


Oh, come one, that one has Lanaktallan scouts landing on Derkin-6 and running face first into Hobby and Susie and Cavvy.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>LANAKTALLAN FREE HERD


Oh, I vote for that one.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TELKAN FORGE WORLDS


I vote for Daxin VS Kris the Krusher Kringle


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TNVARU GRIPPING HANDS


Wait, I change my vote to that one!


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>MANTID FREE WORLDS


Oh, come on, you know how that one will end.


Besides, that one's a Winter Wonderland Holiday Special.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>CONFEDMIL


All right, everyone do a silent vote. We'll do whichever one gets the most votes, even if it's just two votes.


If it's all one vote for each movie, then we'll just do random number selection.josei


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>TELKAN FORGE WORLDS


Heh, I'm going to ruin almost everyone's day.


---NOTHING FOLLOWS---


>>CONFEDMIL


OK, we've got the movie!


Everyone ready?


ALL>Ready!


And... here... we... go!



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