Headed by a Snake

Chapter 719 Must Be Nice

?Coraline's Elven form was... sucked back into the floating fire sphere, but she reappeared in front of Haelvia in a flash, her arms crossed and her chin tilted up.

"My boyfriend is hot, too! You *have* to believe me, Ellll~iiiiie!!!"

"It's fine, it's fiiiine~" Haelvia chuckled.

It seemed her nickname of 'Elle' had turned into 'Ellie.' That was... endearing.

"Ugh..." Coraline shook her head... "I'm... I'm really proud of him..."

Haelvia pursed her lips... "buuut?"

Coraline folded her hands... "I... I dunno."

The gap between Coraline gushing about her boyfriend and suddenly becoming self-conscious about the fact was incredible. It warmed Haelvia's heart...

"How 'bout you tell me about him?" She whispered gently.

"He's... strong..." Coraline's voice regained a bit of its strength... "Really strong. And... he's... a little taller than I am."

"But you'd rather he be as tall as I am?" Haelvia smirked.

"I wish," Coraline shrugged. "I mean err-- no, he's fine like that!! Ahhh! The things you're making me say!?"

Haelvia raised her open palms in apology, "Go on, go on~!"

"He... he likes the outdoors-- kinda important. I'm an elf."

Haelvia raised her eyebrows, still smiling politely. Coraline spoke as if her pointy ears and lithe form was somehow forgettable.

"He's an adventurer, right?" Haelvia sighed... "an adventurer belonging to Sol Invictus..."

"Yeah," Coraline nodded, "He's... loyal, ultimately and unfailingly so... He's... a little dumb sometimes-- incredibly dumb the rest of the time. But... the thing I love about him the most is... that..."

The poor girl's voice started to crack... "he... he never... ever gives up. Not on himself. Not on us."

"He sounds sweet," Haelvia cooed. "I'm sure everything will work out."

Coraline sighed and shook her head, a tiny wisp of flame coming out of where her mouth would be... "But yeah, to summarize: Lone is the muscle... and his handsomeness has a really high rating: B+, easy! And me-- I'm the super-cute, big-brained woman in the relationship that he can always depend on."

Haelvia began to chortle openly at the girl's arrogant words-- "Ohhh no~! Hahaha... Coraline! You're too much."

"I'm joking," Coraline waved her hand, "You were making a really serious face, just now, Ellie."

"Was I?" Haelvia tilted her head, resting her cheek on her fist... "Sorry, dear. I guess... I'm a little jaded about relationships."

"Mmm..." The ball in the fire elf's palms buzzed... "So you don't have anyone like that? Someone you care about?"

Haelvia blinked her eyes as Loki briefly crossed her mind. It was so brief, she didn't think it was worth mentioning.

"I do not," She smiled.

"That's fiiine~!" Coraline exclaimed-- sudden enough to make Haelvia flinch, "Men are trash, anyroad! I got once-in-a-lifetime lucky. Several people died to bring me and my current boyfriend together, y'know!"

"Three, right?" Haelvia frowned, "And two arrested, soon to be killed?"

"Y-yeah," Coraline's ears drooped, "The Holy Country's laws are... very strict."

Haelvia shrugged and stretched her arms, "Must. be. nice."

"What is?"

"To be lucky, for once," Haelvia sighed. "Feels like nothing goes my way... ever since I was born with this freakish height."

"What?" Coraline perked up, "No way! Shut up! You being tall is AWESOME!!"

"What? No. Absolutely not," Haelvia waved her hands, expressively rejecting the notion, "My height's been making people judge me negatively for the past almost twenty years of my life!"

"Pshhhh," The elf waved. "You're Tyrion, right?"

"Y-yeah? H-haelvia of Leopardon-- of Ezyria," Haelvia pursed her lips. "So what?"

Coraline opened her arms wide, "We're in the Eastern States, now! Here, tall women are highly-sought after commodity!"

"Mhm, right." Haelvia sighed in disbelief. "I'll believe it when I see it."

"No, really!" Coraline insisted. "Don't worry about it! Once we get to Whitehearth, I'll take you around."

"Whitehearth, again?"

"Shut up-- listen. We'll hit the public houses and-- and it's not impossible to find you a good man! I've... I've always been better at finding compati-bubbles for my coworkers than finding one, myself. AND luckily for you, I don't need to find a new man! Not until the current one pisses me off."

Haelvia blinked several times, trying to follow the elf's word-vomit, "Um... I really don't think that's a good idea."

"Nope," Coraline shook her head. "You're coming with me, whether you like it or not... or are you challenging our friendship?"

...That was a tough one. Haelvia wanted to reject her elf friend's troublesome proposition... but she couldn't think of a good excuse not to.

"It... it wouldn't be too out of place for me to walk around?" She asked.

"If orcs and dovahkiin, elves and Popotoes can do business in Whitehearth, you'll be fine," Coraline giggled. "But if people are looking, it's probably gonna be at 'dat ass."

"Pardon?"

Haelvia had just heard something incredible.

She stood up straight, feeling slightly hurt. She did squats every day, trying to reduce the useless fat in her buttocks-- but it seemed all that work was useless.

"No, nevermind," Coraline crossed her glowing arms, "First excuse: DENIED. Got any more for me to tear apart with truth, logic, and extreme prejudice?"

"I..." Haelvia gulped as she glanced up at her Divine Armor... "I... want to bring Gaheris. We're... partners? Won't he look out of place in Whitehearth?"

"Oohhhh!! Is that the big guy's name??" Coraline hopped up excitedly, wildly waving at the Divine Armor towering over the both of them, "Hello, Gaheris!"

Haelvia furrowed her brows and leaned forward.

She... she didn't know who was crazier, her for talking to her Divine Armor, or Coraline for doing the same.

The fire elemental left the floating fireball with Haelvia as the elf form floated up towards Gaheris, zooming energetically underneath his arms, over his shoulder, and around his head.

"Beatrice likes him," The little ball hummed, "She says... they're similar?"

"...Are they?" Haelvia twisted her lips to the side... "I... suppose? that's not too surprising?"

"Eh?" The elf-ball fell for a half-second before levitating back up to Haelvia's chest height, "They don't seem anything alike! Beatrice is a fire elemental and Gaheris is... a mana construct?"