Chapter 80 - NO NEED TO RUSH
Chapter 80 - NO NEED TO RUSH
When morning came, Hu Lei found herself alone on the large bed. However, she felt completely rested and refreshed. It had been a long time since she had slept so deeply. She stretched her body in an attempt to eliminate the stiffness in her muscles.
After a few minutes of contemplation, she rose from the bed and went to the bathroom. As expected, Zhong Feng had prepared everything that she needed. When she was brushing her teeth, she looked at her image in the mirror.
The previous night, she had not had the courage to look at her reflection. But she had decided that she would face every fear head on, without shrinking back. If she kept on being a scared little girl afraid to look even at herself, how could she live the life she had always wanted? Moreover, how could she show gratitude to him if she kept running?
Though she did not understand everything that she was feeling, she knew that he was important to her and would be part of her future. After all, it is because she had hoped to have more warm and happy moments with him that she had been able to hold on for as long as she did in that dreadful place.
Unfortunately, her mind still felt muddled. Even though she wanted to begin her recovery, she felt stuck. Like there was a blockage in both her mind and heart. In addition, when she wanted to open her mouth and speak, nothing would come out.
She had some knowledge in the field of psychology, so she knew that her muteness was psychosomatic. Without a trigger, it would be difficult for her to overcome it. It was strange knowing that her inability to speak was all in her mind and still lacking the ability to wish it away. When she had stopped speaking, it had not bothered her at all because she had nothing to say then.
Now, she desperately wanted to be able to talk to Zhong Feng. She had so much to say to him, but she could not even say 'thank you'. She looked at the mirror, right into her bright yellow eyes and tried to convince herself that she could speak if she believed it. But when she opened her mouth, nothing came out.
Of course, she would not give up so easily. She knew that all she needed to do was find the trigger which would release her from the prison of her own mind. If she had been able to leave a cell in the basement of a secret lab in Antarctica, she did not believe that her mind would stop her.
With a fighting attitude, she left the room and went to find Zhong Feng and food.
Zhong Feng was surprised to see Hu Lei with fiery eyes in the morning. He was glad to see her with the demeanour of a little warrior. It seemed that nothing could hold her back. For a moment, he almost pulled her into his arms and said 'welcome back'. But he did not want to do anything to destabilise her emotions. He could only temporarily restrain his feelings and smile.
Soon… there was no need to rush.
He prepared some eggless pancakes and sweet ginger tea. He had not forgotten her pickiness. She must have had a hard time over the years. He felt that this little woman needed to be indulged until the past few years became distant, faded memories.
Hu Lei blushed as she looked at Zhong Feng looking at her with warm eyes. She could not help remembering how she had coerced him into her bed the previous night. Fortunately, he did not bring it up.
After breakfast, she helped Zhong Feng move the clothes and other supplies that he had acquired for her from the bedroom he had originally prepared for her to the new one. The original bedroom was beautiful, spacious and well-decorated. She sneaked a look at him when she first saw it and wondered if he had decorated it for her.
"Do you want to move the décor to the other bedroom?" he asked.
She immediately shook her head. When she saw him look a little dejected, she realised how it must look to him. He probably thought that she did not like it. Actually, she loved everything about the room. From the soft yellowish wall and the sea green accent wall to the cutesy bright paintings and knickknacks around the room, they all made her feel that the room was hers.
Unfortunately, if the items were moved to the other glass garden view room, everything would clash. There would be no harmony or a sense of beauty. If she had the chance, she would like to leave this room as is and use it once she stopped feeling trapped.
She turned to him and opened her mouth before realising that she still could not speak. She felt frustrated with herself again. Zhong Feng saw her fallen face and patted her still wild hair lightly. She looked up at him and then made a heart-shape with her hands.
Of course, she could try to mouth words, but she did not want take the easy way out. Who knew if she would get comfortable with mouthing and compromise her full recovery?
After moving the stuff, she stepped out of the house and settled on one of the couches in the patio. Her eyes were still not comfortable in light, but it was not very bright outside. She took a moment to appreciate the natural view. This property was overwhelmingly beautiful. The lawn was lush in spite of the cold weather.
Beyond the lawn, there was stunning live hedge surrounding the seemingly endless yard. Behind the hedge, there were tall trees which seemed to surround the entire property. Her room which faced the other side of the mansion also had a forested area beyond the large garden.
While relaxing like this, she turned her mind to the past, trying to focus on each detail. She felt that rediscovering all her memories was the key to speaking again and discovering true healing. Regrettably, her actual memories began when she was eight and in a lab.
Before that, she could not recall any childhood memory. She did not know whether she was happy or sad as a child or what she had done. After the ordeal in the lab, she had been rescued and returned to her father and mother. Not long after, her mother had committed her to a mental institution. She had been released not long after through her father's intervention.
She focussed on everything that had happened and the feelings behind it. She did not believe that she would not discover the trigger to her silent mouth and cold heart.