I Fell For My Nemesis

Chapter 21 - That Wasn't What I Was Asking

After dinner Avery cheerfully began offering movie suggestions based on the kind Christian said he usually watched on their last date. They settled on one and about ten minutes later she had curled up with her head on his shoulder.

He couldn't deny he was enjoying it but he was perplexed. And knew he shouldn't be enjoying it because getting involved if she was more invested than he was would make him feel awful.

He should really draw some sort of boundaries and make his intentions clear but at the same time he wanted the closeness. It was all rather conflicting.

The only hang-up he had here was the fact that he was a superhero and he knew he couldn't be a good boyfriend and keep his secret at the same time. Should he use that dumb excuse Liam came up with? She seemed to be a fairly tolerant person considering she hadn't been mad about their disaster of a date. She might be cool with it.

But what about long-term? Settling down was impossible for Christian as long as his secret identity was a factor. Getting involved with someone he really liked knowing it wouldn't go anywhere would hurt him too.

Oh, why had he let Liam goad him into asking her out in the first place? This wasn't going to end well for either of them.

As much as he was enjoying this he needed to do the right thing and let her know where he stood. He waited until the movie was done to broach the subject because she seemed pretty into it and he didn't want to spoil her mood earlier than necessary.

Avery lifted her head off his shoulder, stretched, and smiled at him. "I don't think we have time for another one but we could play a game or something. I have a bunch."

"Avery…I'm really sorry about this but I should go," he said miserably.

"Oh, do you have something else you have to do tonight?"

She wasn't getting it. He really didn't want to explain it either but he had to get the words out before she got more invested in something that wasn't going to be able to happen. It wouldn't be fair to her.

"No, that isn't it. I'm not quite sure how to say this but I can't get involved with anyone long-term. I really, really like you but it wouldn't be fair to get your hopes up without being able to make any promises. I'm so sorry."

To his surprise, Avery laughed. "Who said I expected any promises? I'm here living in the moment and thoroughly enjoying myself. The future can be worried about later."

Christian frowned. She really didn't care? He needed to try and talk her out of this.

"Are you sure? Because I have a second 'on call' job and am busy most weekends. You wouldn't like getting canceled on or playing second fiddle to what I have going on, would you? I'm really not good boyfriend material."

"What a coincidence! I'm not good girlfriend material either. Doesn't that make us perfectly matched?" she asked cheerfully.

He was pretty sure that wasn't how that worked. And how exactly was she not good girlfriend material? She was beautiful, understanding, and flexible. Was she saying that to try and make him feel better?

Christian raised an eyebrow. "How would YOU not be good girlfriend material?"

Avery shrugged. "I can't commit long-term either. So wouldn't that make me the best possible person to date?"

The offer in front of him was tempting. Almost too tempting to resist. How was he supposed to do the right thing here when she was willing to give him exactly what he wanted no questions asked?

"It wouldn't be fair to either of us though," he said quietly.

"Who cares about fair? Life isn't fair. The world isn't fair. So shouldn't we take a chance at being happy even if it is temporary? Life is fleeting and I want to live mine without regrets."

Her words carried extra weight because she had lost both of her parents at different points. She was used to losing people but that didn't prevent her from wanting to continue living as if the possibility didn't matter. Who was he to argue with that?

Christian had been wavering anyway. He didn't need further persuasion to do what he already wanted to. If she was willing to risk getting hurt he would have to be too. Putting an expiration date before something even started was pointless because no one ever had any idea how long it would last.

His circumstance might be unusual but didn't he deserve to be happy too? If Avery was okay with the uncertainty and wanted to be with him regardless…

Why would she be okay with that though? What did she see in him that made her think it was worth it? He needed to know before he could make a decision one way or the other. Awkward as it may be to ask.

"What is it exactly that you like about me to be willing to do this?" Christian asked hesitantly.

Avery moved closer and his breath caught in his throat because of the soft expression on her face. "What's not to like? You're kind, funny, and considerate. Talking to you is always the highlight of my day."

Talking to her was the highlight of his day too whenever he saw her and had been for a long time now. If he ignored the potential problems there was no real reason for that to stop. They both liked each other and weren't going into this blind.

Why shouldn't he do something for himself for once? He had spent most of his life selflessly serving others without expecting anything in return. The one time he wanted something it happened to be a rather selfish wish but as long as she was willing and aware of the situation as she could be without outing himself as Mercury it should be fine.

"What about me?" Avery asked suddenly.

Christian had been lost in thought and didn't understand the question. "Huh?"

"What do you like about me? You asked and I told you so it's only fair you do the same thing."

Ah. How to answer this? Originally, he was interested in her because of her rather unique appearance and how lively she was compared to his dull existence. But now that he had talked to her more he could appreciate her sense of humor and enthusiasm more fully. That had only made him fall harder.

"I've never met anyone else as interesting as you," he said truthfully. "Talking to you is the highlight of my day too."

Avery let out a small laugh. "Interesting how?"

Christian was embarrassed to admit how shallow he was but he didn't want to lie. "Well, the first thing that caught my attention was your eyes. I had never seen that color before. But you also seemed really into the cake consultation you were doing, talking with your hands a lot, and I was intrigued.

"I ended up watching your cake decoration videos not long after and saw how much passion you poured into that. I'm a pretty boring person so I guess it was a case of opposites attract. I enjoy your enthusiasm."

"I don't think you're boring."

"Thanks."

He wasn't sure what else to say to that. Or what he was supposed to do now that their potential issue had been squared away.

Avery had no such hesitation. She blinked at him with those beautiful violet eyes before leaning in closer than before. "So now that we've established there isn't a problem here what do you want to do?"

Christian couldn't think because of how close her face was to his and the way her eyes were bewitching him. Rather than saying what he wanted he ended up doing it completely out of instinct. The temptation to kiss her was too strong and he lost his head for a moment.

He realized what he was doing and that he hadn't asked for permission almost immediately and tried to pull away but she wasn't having it. Her arms snaked around his neck as she continued the kiss. What little remained of his rationality vanished after that. He was drowning in Avery West.

When they finally broke apart she laughed breathlessly. "That wasn't what I was asking but I think I like that answer better."

Christian smiled a bit sheepishly. "Sorry. What were you asking?"

"My original question before you tried to brush me off. If you wanted to watch another movie or play games."

Oops. Truthfully, he wanted to keep kissing her. He didn't think he would be able to focus on anything else right now. Would that be too terrible to admit? Especially since they hadn't established anything in terms of whether or not this was going to be a relationship.

They both admitted they couldn't commit long term but that didn't mean they couldn't commit for the time being. He would feel like a terrible person if he kept kissing her without putting a label on it.