Little Miss Witch: Revenge of the Tainted Angel

Chapter 163 - You Are Only Fooling Yourself Here (1)

The city was now filled with snow as winter was fast approaching. Li Chuntao felt that time passed in a blink of an eye. It felt like it was only yesterday that Ying passed away and she moved in with Mu Jianyu? She only has a month left to totally break him and leave this place for good. 

Li Chuntao once again found herself having trouble sleeping that night. She stayed awake the whole night and when she climbed out of bed, she stepped out of Ying's room. She didn't forget to take a shawl and placed it over her shoulder.

The enormous living room was particularly quiet. The warm lamps were on and emitting soft light, lighting up the place while the sun had yet to rise outside. 

Mu Jianyu still wasn't at home, 'spending another night at work', when in fact, he was spending another night with Lin Meirong. Now that the slut had lost her career, she had no one to rely on but him. Her baby bump would be obvious by now and Li Chuntao could sense Mu Jianyu's anxiety as Lin Meirong's pregnancy progresses. 

Thinking that it was too early to go outside, Li Chuntao slid the door leading to the balcony and stepped out. The morning air was chilly, and yet it didn't bother her that much as she'd been long used to the cold weather.. 

Her eyes instinctively turned to look at Shen Zichen's balcony only to see it was empty and the doors were closed. She lowered her eyes and scoffed to herself. Shen Zichen hadn't come home in weeks. What was she expecting anyway?

It's been almost a month since their encounter at the cemetery and she had not received any phone calls or messages from him. She couldn't blame him for being angry. After all that she'd done, how would he be able to accept her? 

Her hand reached out and touched her belly. It was empty like her heart. The womb that housed her own baby for months, the baby that she'd lost… how could she forget? In these seven years, she'd been fighting back her own emotions, but now she could finally let herself go. 

If she hadn't fallen in love with Shen Zichen, would all of these happen? 

If she hadn't risked her life back then and waited for the rescue team to retrieve them from the burning mansion, wouldn't that mean she wouldn't have to endure the pain of having her skin burned? For so many months she couldn't sleep on her back and even a subtle change in temperature could make her feel pain that was beyond words to describe. 

When they were kidnapped, she didn't think of how dangerous it would be for her. She was just desperate back then, seeing that he'd been drugged and wasn't fully conscious, when the fire started to spread around them. Shen Zichen could hear her but he could barely recognize where they were and what was happening with his foggy eyesight. 

But she just wanted him to be alright. Even if he doesn't return her feelings, she was determined to protect him as long as she could. 

If she had told him, she got pregnant from their drunken mistake, what could have happened? 

But how could she not forget that it was Ying whom he wanted and not her? That the love he felt right now was just a manifestation of what could've been if he was with Ying? 

Wasn't it because she lost Ying that he felt sorry for her, and so that was why he treated her so nice? 

The funny thing was, during the time he'd claimed her as his lover, Li Chuntao had stupidly felt happy by how he had treated her. As if she was the one whom he loved and not Ying, so much so that she deluded herself, believing that he had feelings for her and there could be a chance for a future for the both of them. 

How foolish. Perhaps, it was time for her to give up on these feelings she had for him. Maybe it was time for her to move on even though it would be hard to not continue loving him. 

However, was there even a way to unlove a person you couldn't have? How do you teach your heart not to care anymore? 

'Li Chuntao, are you even worthy of love?' She mocked herself. 

The love that she kept for ten long years, she was finally ready to give it up. This time, once she was done with her revenge, she intended to leave everything behind her for good. By all means, she must win the bet she had with her Uncle Yuren to do so. 

All these years, in order to protect Shen Zichen, in order for him to be happy with Ying without her witnessing it, Li Chuntao thought about them before herself. It was always about them and never herself. 

Some people might think it was cowardice, that she should've fought for her own happiness but it was easier said than done. How can she get jealous and hate the woman Shen Zichen like when her rival was her own twin sister? 

In this world, no one would love and protect her feelings as fiercely as she would, so maybe it was time for her to look after herself. To treat herself better, to take care of herself. Li Chuntao decided to prioritize and think for herself this time. 

For years, she tried to convince herself that leaving was the right thing to do, even when she found out she was pregnant with his child, she still tried not to get in their way. Since he said that he would pursue Ying, she would allow him to do so, but she knew it would be painful for her to witness the man she loved go after her twin sister. 

A foolish, pathetic woman she might've been but she wasn't a masochist to that extent, to allow herself to see them together. Li Chuntao didn't think she could watch them without her heart breaking into a million pieces. 

Maybe it was best that Shen Zichen found out her secrets and how horrible of a woman she was. A witch like her had no right to love. Maybe this was why she'd lost everyone she loved dearly. It must be her destiny to live alone in this lifetime. 

When Yu Lou woke up and went to the living area, she was shocked to see her Miss Chuntao outside on the balcony. She rushed to the balcony and felt her whole body shiver from the coldness of the morning air. 

"Miss Chuntao! Please get inside or you'll get sick!" 

Li Chuntao turned her head and nodded. She followed Yu Lou inside and closed the door behind her and went back to the comfort Ying's room offered. Instantly, the slight color on her pale skin came back and she felt better. She wasn't sure how long she'd spent outside that she missed three calls on her phone. 

She also received a short message from the same unregistered number that called her early that morning.. It was her, the slut who ruined Ying's happiness. Why was Lin Meirong calling her?