Loving Madeline

Chapter 298 Guilt

Madeline's POV

When I opened my eyes, I realized I was lying on a hospital bed. I could see the apparatus attached to my body, and my entire body felt weak.

When I turned my head, I saw my husband's face lit up when our eyes met, and I couldn't stop having butterflies in my stomach.

I was disoriented at first about why I was in the hospital. Then, the memories of what happened came rushing back into my mind.

"Welcome back, Madeline," Hunter whispered.

"My love, thank goodness you are finally awake." He added as he took and caressed my hand.

I remained speechless as I recollected we were in the cemetery. I could see the sadness on my husband's face that day, and I jerked when I remembered someone had shot me in my chest.

"Is there anyone hurt during Parker and Rebecca's burial?" I asked, concerned.

"Hey, don't worry about what happened. Everyone was safe except you, my love. I am sorry if I failed to protect you." He responded as he kissed my knuckles.

"I felt thirsty," I mumbled, and he got up and gave me water.

I stayed in the hospital for how many days until one day, Calixto narrated everything that happened on the day I got shot. I felt so thankful that he told me about it, and I felt betrayed that my husband and best friend lied to me. They didn't inform me my father-in-law saved my life.

I pretended I was asleep when my husband whispered in my ear he was going out for a while, and I realized he would be attending his dad's funeral.

I could say my husband asked Gina to look after me while he was away. How could he remain so caring when I was the reason his father got killed? My guilt intensified as I thought of Clark's selfless act of kindness.

"Hey, why are you crying, Maddie?" Gina asked, and I didn't realize my tears were falling down my cheeks.

"I felt so guilty, Gina, our plan didn't work," I said as I looked at my best friend.

"Don't be guilty; you didn't do anything wrong; I know how much you wanted to attend Parker's funeral." She responded.

"Yeah, and Hunter's family is dealing with another ordeal. Hunter is suffering because of me. First, he lost Parker and his first love. I knew even if Rebecca was no longer part of his life, his young self loved that woman, and they were still connected even if he won't tell me about it," I replied as I felt her take my hand.

"Don't tell me you were jealous of Rebecca?" She asked, and I slowly nodded my head.

"Yeah, I knew it was stupid, but he was Hunter's first love, Gina, and she was dead, and now, he was attending his dad's funeral," I responded, and my best friend's eyes widened.

"Who told you?" She asked.

"I hated you for keeping it a secret from me, and no one told me except Calixto, and I realized he was the only one I could trust in this world," I replied, and her face fell.

"You knew that is not true, Meg," she said as I could see the hurt on her face.

"Why didn't you tell me when I asked you how was Clark?" I asked, and Gina was silent for a while, and she let out a soft sigh before he answered me.

"I am sorry, Madeline, I don't intend to lie to you, but you should believe I was worried about your condition. You were just out from surgery, and you needed time to heal." She replied in more than a whisper.

"When one of Clark's men fired his weapon, it was the scariest day of my entire life. You just don't realize how worried I was when I heard the gunshot; I wanted to get out of the vehicle, but your father's friend stopped me." Gina added, and she was crying.

"He only did the right thing; if you ran towards me, you could have been killed, Gina. We promised each other never to put ourselves in danger." I responded, and she shook her head.

"Yeah, but you are so important to me, Maddie," she replied, and I felt so guilty that I accused her of something she wasn't, and I know I can always count on my best friend.

"I am sorry, Gina; I know you will always be there for me. I understand you don't want me to worry about what happened to my father-in-law, but I needed to know the truth." I stated.

"Yeah, and acted differently towards your husband who loves you very much, the same person willing to give you the moon and the sun just to make you happy?" She responded, and I averted my best friend's gaze.

"I should have stopped you, and none of this would happen; you almost got killed, Maddie. I don't know what will happen to me if you don't survive," Gina added, and she could no longer hold her tears.

"Hey, I am alive, and luckily I survived the surgery, and there was no complication. I am now fine, Gina." I replied with a weak smile.

"Madeline, you are not yet fine, you need to have a lot of rest, and you don't need to stress yourself. You should treat Hunter nicely, Maddie." She added as she looked at me with concern.

"How can I talk to him knowing he lost the only father he knew because of me? His loved ones will always be in danger if I am with him." I replied.

"What you mean by that, Madeline?" My best friend asked as she was shaking her head.

"It would be hard, but I think it would be best if he will stay away from me." I softly mumbled.

"Are you crazy? Do you realize what you were talking about?" She responded.

"Don't do this to yourself, and don't drive your husband away; you will be miserable without Hunter, and you know that; how could you even say those words?" Gina added.

"We all know Charlotte and her father connived with each other; maybe at the last minute, Clark realized he was doing the wrong thing, and he saved you." Gina declared.

"I heard from Calixto Lily made a speech, and everybody heard what she said; I guess Hunter's dad felt guilty, and he did it for his daughter. Lily was devastated; she will be more brokenhearted if you continue ignoring her brother." My best friend added.

"What should I do with this guilt, Gina? How can I be the same again?" I asked as I put my hand over my chest.

"You should stop feeling guilty, Madeline; you weren't the one who pulled the trigger and injured someone; it was one of Clark's men. Hunter's dad died because of his heroic act; at least he died with a purpose and dignity." She replied.

"He died as a hero, Madeline, and those people didn't know Clark was the mastermind of that shooting incident. If you feel blameworthy, I should never stop blaming myself. I am your best friend, yet I didn't stop you; instead, I gave you my full support." Gina declared, and she let out a heavy sigh while I fell silent.

"Your grandfather was blaming himself too, and I think we should stop since we can't undo what happened. It would be an eye-opener to us; we weren't born as heroes, Madeline." Gina added.

"We made our family worried." She continued.

"If you don't want to see your husband, if that is what your heart desires, I needed to speak with him; if Hunter's presence made you sicker, I think he will understand." She stated, and I looked at her without saying anything.

"I will talk with Hunter to stop coming here while you are healing, but you have to promise me you will never give up on him, Maddie." She begged, and I weakly smiled at her.

"Gina, I love my husband so much, and I wish to make him happy. I don't deserve to have him in my life anymore. I brought him too much trouble." I responded.

"You are his happiness, Madeline, and you know that; why do you feel that way now? You had been through a lot together. Hunter would become more miserable without you. You can't stop him from loving you." Gina replied as she took my hand.

"He is your husband, Maddie, and you promised to be there for each other for the rest of your lives. Do you think he will give up on you?" She added.

"You better stop giving him a cold treatment, or else you will be the one to suffer in the end." Gina continued.

"I don't want to see my husband as of the moment. I must forgive myself first, or I will forever carry this burden deep inside me." I responded.

"The more I see his face, the more I feel guilty about what is happening in his life, Gina," I added.

"You better talk to him, Madeline. He deserved to know what was playing in your head right now; if you still love your husband, you have to speak with him." My best friend said.

"Of course I do, but I don't want him to end up hating me when he realizes I was the reason his entire family was having a hard time right now," I said.

"I don't know what I felt like this, Gina," I mumbled.

"I think you need more time to rest when you get better, and I am sure everything will be alright. Maybe it was because of the anesthesia or the medication you are taking that is why you have these sentiments." Gina declared.

"No, I know how I feel, Gina," I replied.

"He didn't tell me he would attend his father's funeral, and it made me sadder," I mumbled.

"You know, he doesn't want you to be stressed about what happened to his father. Hunter wanted you to recover soon." Gina replied.

I don't know how I will face Hunter's family, especially Lily. I know how much she loves her dad. And even if my husband was with me the entire time I ignored him because of my guilt that eating me up.