My Servant Is An Elf Knight From Another World

Chapter 145 - The Reasons Why, Part 2

He resented.

Prior to this, Jay hadn't once displayed any brazen signs of open hostility. Not even when after having been caught red-handed in the act. Even then, the Magus stayed mostly civil, mostly polite, slightly peeved, maybe… but never, ever vexed.

Anger wasn't an expression I thought I'd see on such a friendly face. Hadn't know him all that long, but I can tell with confidence his eyes were really not meant to glint the way they did.

Only for a moment, gone in an instant, a flick of a switch, just like that - he resented no longer… but resented he did.

Resented me.

I pretended I didn't see anything, just a trick of the light refracting against his cracked lenses… it was the only I could have kept my voice steady as I said to him as nonchalantly as I could, "I don't remember stealing anybody from anyone."

Ash affirmed my statement with a few bold well-chosen words of her own. "I was never yours to begin with! It is I who choose who it is that I serve… and most definitely it would never have been you."

It was more than just dejection that showed. Ash's words seem to lash out at him, every syllable a slap in the face. There was that forced blankness, emotions stifled away… but it was a much harder ordeal hiding sadness than it was anger.

"Course you're saying that," He quietly muttered. "You have to say that. He's your Master, after all… you wouldn't be you if you didn't. Still, all in all, I'm glad that it is you."

Words uttered without a single inkling of malevolent intent. I tried, I looked and scour so hard trying to find for any hint of spite or malice harboring beneath his those soft unblinking eyes. 

Ultimately, I found none… making it all the more unsettling that I didn't.

Ash shared in the same sentiments, her brow growing more furrowed by the second. "You've earned no right to speak to me the way that you do. You know nothing of me, refrain from speaking to me as if you do."

"But I do."

"You don't!"

"I'm sorry if it upsets you," Jay took a step forward. "But I know more about you than you do yourself. I know everything there is to know about you. Who you are, who you'll be, and who you were… and I ought to know this, after all… I spent years watching you from behind a computer screen."

Quite talkative now, wasn't he? Only her, only when regards to Ash - his lips start to loosen. If directly questioning him wouldn't work, then we'll just have to revolve our questions around what he really was passionate about.

Irene thought as much too, jumping onto the opportunity as soon as it presented itself. "Yes, you mentioned before, didn't you? You were there when Howard came up with her design. Personal favorite, was it?"

"It's quite a strange story," Jay said, still staring at Ash. "Before everything, you were nothing to me. Just a simple name in an email… a random throwaway tidbit adding to Leonardo's history. I never thought you'd be so much more than that."

There it was, spoken between words of endearment… hidden in the shimmer of a longing stare.

"So that was also you," I said, amplifying my voice slightly, trying to divert his gaze back to mine. "The email. You're Howard's inspiration, the info-giver. Kronocia's history… why give it to him? What were you trying to accomplish? What's your end-goal here?"

It wasn't as if I was demanding an answer out of him that urgently, but I wasn't asking just for the sake of being rhetoric. I spoke out, threading a fine line between being civil and being insistent. Thought maybe a little politeness would go a long way in getting him to cooperate.

Shouldn't be at all surprising that my consideration simply continued to fall on deaf ears - Jay simply hadn't any interest in answering anything that he didn't care about.

And for now, there was only one thing he did care about…

I felt my eyes veer slightly to the long locks of white to my right. "What's it have to do with Ash?"

Like an arcade cabinet slotted with coins, Jay became receptive again the moment her name was uttered. Ash was his coin.

"Before? Nothing," He answered, briefly casting his gaze towards Irene and me. "She wasn't even in mind. Before all I wanted was for Howard to make the damn game. I couldn't do it, I know nothing about game design, so I left it to him, gave him everything he needed for ideas to finally take hold."

"Of course he took some initiative, decided to change a few things here and there… but hey, it was close enough to what I had in mind so who cares if he took some artistic liberties?"

Ash, sensing little to no opposition from the bespectacled solemn face before her, slowly dropped the tip of the blade at an angle facing the ground. Though her gaze remained as vigilant and stern as ever, like us, it seems she thought it better to hear him out… at least just for the time being.

"Besides…" Jay continued, the corner of his lips faintly curving upwards. "If it weren't for those same artistic liberties… you wouldn't even be here, you wouldn't even exist… and that, more than anything else, would have been the most tragic thing ever."

"She's an Elf," Irene spoke. "As a Kronocian, you should know - "

"I know what I know," Jay spoke across from her, raising a single finger in the air. "And yes, she's an Elf… I was raised as you were, taught as you were… Elves are bad and that's that. I never argued against it, I'm still on the otherside of that fence. Elves are pure evil."

Emotions could not betray Ash's sturdy gaze, an unfeeling quiet, a barren stare… 

I, on the other hand, wasn't as good at keeping my emotions in check. Annoyance begetting anger, anger begetting boldness, boldness… had me stomping a step forward.

"Ash is - !"

"Different, isn't she?" Jay suddenly whirled his eyes towards me. "Thought you might think so. So, so different. You know, I saw her concept art… shook hands with her VA, I never even batted an eye at her. Just an Elf… plenty other characters more intriguing just by design alone… what's there to her?"

"So what changed?" Irene asked.

Jay had a full-on smile now on display, one that looked on the verge of breaking into all-out laughter. Then, like a flick of a switch, it changed again, amused… to affectionate.

I really dislike how he was smiling at her, looking at her.

"I got to know you, got to talk to you, be with you," He blinked, narrowing his lips. "Howard's no creator… but he sure can write a captivating character. Over time, you stopped being something to hate. Over time… it's like... you were the only one I could really talk to."

Ash stared perplexingly, shook her head perplexingly. "I do not recall - "

"Of course not. You wouldn't know. It wasn't real, after all. Just a game..." Jay blew a quiet sigh. "But it was real to me… you were real to me."

Never thought there'd be a string of sentences that could send a cold shiver down my spine as much as his did… but there were, there was, and I don't think I was gonna like what he was going to say next. 

"You were never in my plans, but after interacting with you, you became a fundamental part of it. You needed to be real, I needed you to be real…"

"You fell for an Elf?" Irene's voice was filled with outright disbelief, her expression was even more so. "Loved? In spite of it? Have you gone mad?"

"This is unheard of!" Ash snapped, her sword flickering up raised and ready once more. "Do not lie to me!"

Jay had his arms up again, calm in the face of Ash's ire. "It's… it's true. Don't care how bizarre it sounds. I've fallen. Perhaps a little too much for my own good - but I don't care. Heck, I didn't even know what love was until I finally made you smile for the first time, and by then, I was head over heels already."

Ash pursed her lips. "That wasn't me. She wasn't me!"

"It could have been, it should have been!" He raised his voice, briefly that look of resentment appearing, dissipating. "I got hasty, I got careless… I knew I wasn't ready, the concept was still foreign to me, I knew, but I still did it anyway."

"Did what anyway?" I asked, surreptitiously inching myself closer to Ash's position. "I'm assuming something very stupid."

"Very," Jay said, shaking his head. "But I took it as a learning experience. I knew how it works now, knew exactly what I've been doing wrong."

"What are you talking about?"

"The Blight," He continued shaking from left to right. "Come on, I'm good but not that good. It's not a first time success thing getting it to fall on here… summoning it - there were bound to be mistakes first… failures…"

Jay trailed away, and as he did, his eyes once again settled onto Ash's. It was then that it clicked for me, what any of this had to do with anything… those eyes didn't just stare… they lamented.

"Failures…" I mumbled. 

A secluded alley on a rainy day… there, once upon a time, an Elf descended into my life by means unknown. I questioned it always but never actually wondered… not until now…

How did she appear? Why did she appear?

I never once bothered to ask who made her appear… 

"I thought it was a failure, I thought I messed up somehow. She never appeared. Over and over again, it never worked. Thought maybe that was it - I failed… I can't get her… time to move on with the actual plan. It never occurred to me that I actually pulled it off - not until I saw you for myself, not until you three walked through the front entrance." 

Now, staring into his unblinking gaze, peering into the tenderness of his eyes, it seems all at once, those questions had found their answer, and they were all the same answer.

"If you don't mind me asking," The Magus said politely. "Could you tell me just where you found her?"