Pursuing Immortality

(TL/N: The original title “????” literally means “a fight between fairies (or some other similar magical creatures)” and the term “??” (roughly, fairies, but not necessarily the same thing) also has an extended meaning of “alluring woman”. Basically, the expression is a euphemism of sexual intercourse and is said to originate from the book “Dream of the Red Chamber”, or “???”, where a not-so-bright young maid found a french-postcard-styled embroidered satchel in the garden and thought it to be a illustration of “two naked fairies fighting with each other”.)

“Bang!”

Barely had she squeezed out the last three words when Xiaozhai’s right hand rose and she exerted strength with her palm. Gu Yu was instantly pushed away. With the momentum, Xiaozhai herself also stood up.

“…”

Gu Yu was burning like a wildfire back there and the interruption took him by surprise. The hesitation was immediately taken over by an impulse to lash out frantically, just to be rid of this oppressed urge.

It was a sensation little virgin boys might find hard to perceive. Let’s just call it the ultimate torture imaginable to men.

His eyes darted from head to toe and back of the person right in front of him. The temptation her body emanated rekindled the desire inside him. His only thought now was to pounce at her and strip the fair body of all its covers, the same way as he peeled off the tender skin of the burgeoning willow twigs by the river when he was little.

“Hehe!”

Seeing the red flash in his eyes, Xiaozhai sneered, rose swiftly to her feet, and leapt out of the room. “Gu Yu, come and fight me!”

She re-fastened the belt of her gown and beckoned with her index finger. “You only get to sleep with the girl after you win.”

‘What!’

The toxin-induced heat rampaging inside Gu Yu was struggling for a way out. Provoked by Xiaozhai’s words, Gu Yu jumped out of his room without hesitation.

Xiaozhai was serious about her challenge. She approached Gu Yu with a single stride and charged at him with an open palm. Pulling in his chin and arching his back, Gu Yu swept his left arm across the air and turned his hand outwards, trying to catch her forearm.

It was a move from the arrest technique. If carried out successfully, it could instantly dislocate one’s joint.

He was extremely fast. However, when his finger almost reached Xiaozhai’s forearm, her palm flipped over and, turning at an unbelievable angle, wrapped around his arm like a snake.

Immediately after that, she shifted the point of her attack from her palms to her fingers, which stretched out, pinched together like an orchid, and stabbed at Gu Yu’s eyes. Gu Yu pressed down with his left elbow hastily so as to knock into the crook of her arm. Her palm making another circle, Xiaozhai dodged his downward motion and stuck out her fingers again.

In that brief moment, the two had exchanged seven to eight blows, both using the forty-eight hand movements of Xiaozhai’s sect.

Xiaozhai was fighting bare-footed. Her neutral-colored gown flapped with the wind as she moved graceful to and fro. However, the expression on her face was nowhere near as pleasant; her solemn face looked as dark as a deep pool of still water.

She was mad at Gu Yu. ‘I have no problem with you driving over-speed a little, but no DUI. Not to mention that you are not only DUI, you are drugged and trying to get into my pants at the same time!’

She would not tolerate it!

The duo cuffed and kicked in the opening outside the houses, flying all over the place and locking in a fierce struggle.

Xiaozhai changed between palm and finger attacks, her dazzling movements reminding one of ten thousand petals drifting in the wind all at once and spring orchids dangling in clusters, her bearing graceful and neat. Having been taught by Xiaozhai, Gu Yu might not understand the moves as thoroughly as her, but he was fast, ferocious, and his powerful movements were like gusts of winds.

Of course, both had restrained themselves from using their full power, or this courtyard would be in pieces in no time.

Gu Yu was able to vent much of his unjustified impulse as he fought on and he gradually calmed down. Another few blows and he shuddered all of a sudden, like a giant bell hanging in the mountains that received a violent kick.

‘Hey, this does not feel right! Why am I behaving like a poodle, capable of nothing but the thought of humping someone?’ It dawned on him immediately that the peach flower miasma had got him…

“Xiaozhai, stop!” His eyes were clear and bright again and his voice was back to normal.

“And you think you can just order me around?”

“Xiaozhai…”

“Finish this fight and we’ll talk!”

Ignoring his calls, Xiaozhai pinched her fingers together into a beak and stabbed right at his chest.

Gu Yu’s color changed a little at this, for that was the most powerful one of the forty-eight hand movements—a single strike consisted of three consecutive attacking methods. He dared not take it head-on without protecting himself with his spiritual essence first.

Cornered, he thrusted against the ground with his toes, making a hasty retreat and flying out of the yard in an instant.

***

Long Qiu was woken up from her sleep at the middle of the night. Rubbing her eyes, she stumbled out of her room and saw her brother (“daddy”) and sister (“mummy”) fighting.

The scene scared her. Rushing to their side, Long Qiu cried out, “Stop it! Why are you fighting with each other all of a sudden?”

“None of your business. Go back to sleep!” Xiaozhai shouted back as she kept charging at Gu Yu.

“Xiao Qiu, go back inside. We’re fine!” Gu Yu hurried to ward off the blows.

‘You’re fine? Like I’d buy that!’

Long Qiu might be a simple girl, but that did not mean she was stupid. Those two had “not fine” written all over them. Torn with anxiety, Long Qiu’s eyes darted between the battling duo, unable to think of a solution.

Racking her brain, the young girl gritted her teeth and thought mediation by force her only way out.

“Golden Silkworm!”

At her clear voice, an invisible fluctuation flew out of her body and injected itself between the two in the blink of an eye.

“Thump!”

Both disarrayed, Gu Yu and Xiaozhai stopped exchanging blows, but had to fight back the Golden Silkworm first.

“Go back to bed, did you hear me?”

“Xiao Qiu, stop meddling with us!”

“You two, stop fighting!”

Gosh, how their action had worried the girl! These two just would not give her a break. Long Qiu was what you called “an iron hand in a velvet glove”—the more critical the situation was, the calmer she became. She kept her gaze on the two, searching for an opening.

Xiaozhai struck out again and Gu Yu leapt up, apparently trying to jump towards the old tree. Xiaozhai was at his heels and the palms of the two met as they were both mid-air above the river.

Long Qiu’s face lit up—there was the opening she looked for.

The two separated, both trying to turn around and find a place to land. While they were still in the air, however, the invisible Golden Silkworm twirled and knocked into their chests. The inner Qi gathered at their chests dissipated at this and they lost their momentum. Both fell rapidly towards the water.

“Splash!”

“Flop!”

They hit the surface simultaneously, splashing water in all directions. Even the red lantern on the old tree swayed at the impact.

“…”

Long Qiu ran to the river and watched from ashore. Before long, she heard some more splashing sounds and the two resurfaced at the same time.

“Brother! Sister!”

Dragging the two out of the water, she was flustered and concerned. “What exactly was going on with you two? Why were you fighting?”

“Haha, we couldn’t sleep and thought we could use a bit of exercise.”

Xiaozhai was wrapped in her dripping garment, her wet hair stuck to her face in streaks. She rubbed Xiao Qiu on her head and turned to a certain fellow. “Sober yet?”

“Um…”

Gu Yu was embarrassed. That was super-duper humiliating! Having fought for that long in the middle of the night and soaked in the cold water, he was still not fully “detoxed”, but could control himself now.

Seeing Xiaozhai now, he could not find the right words and only managed to “I, I…” after a long while.

“Good, nice to see you sober up!”

Xiaozhai splattered her way back to her room, still not wearing any shoes. Gu Yu dared not stop her. He was pulling his hair out in trying to figure out if she was mad, angry, or infuriated.

“Sister, don’t go to bed yet… aiya, Brother, let me boil some water. You two, change your clothes!”

Still at lost of what was going on, Long Qiu was alternating her role between a dad and a mum. Even her heart felt tired.

***

When everyone finally settled down, the dawn was breaking.

Gu Yu and Xiaozhai each took a quick shower, changed into dry clothes, and returned to their separate rooms. Lying on his bed, Gu Yu was still wide awake. Xiaozhai and Long Qiu’s rooms, on the other hand, were as quiet as when he just got back.

How should he proceed from tonight’s event?

He knew Xiaozhai and the way she thought. With what they had already, she would not object to take things further, but not like this.

To put it in vulgar terms, it would be like when the husband of an old married couple depended solely on an aphrodisiac to get an arousal so as to get excited with his wife and “got it over with”.

That was just disrespectful .

A problem required solution and he was no procrastinator. After a brief consideration, he got off the bed.

“Creak!”

Leaving his room, he walked the moonlit ground and arrived at Xiaozhai’s door. He asked in a whisper, “Are you asleep?”

“No.” He got a reply.

“…”

After a brief moment of silence, Gu Yu pushed the door open.