Rise Of The Hoarder

Chapter 32 Trauma Of The Past

From a very small age, I had found out already…

“Teacher, Jeremy is being weird again!”

“W-What did I do? I just…”

“Shut up, Jeremy! How many times have I told you…”

As a child, I discovered, or rather… The truth became glaring to me, forced down my throat until it was one thing that remained constant throughout my life… The world is unfair!

Some are born with good looks, charms, flair, and natural interactive skills.

Some have money, born into rich families, they become highly influential in their environment.

In such a world, all you need is luck, something outside your control. If you’re born ugly, short, poor, and introverted… There’s nothing you can do about it.

“Jeremy’s weird…”

“He keeps talking to himself in such a weird way”

“He doesn’t have any friends…”

“Just look at how miserable he looks, what could he have done in his past life to earn such a face?”

“Pfft, and he’s so short too!”

“He looks like a twig.”

“More like a little shit. Haha!”_.

I grew up hearing those words from everyone around me. I always wondered to myself whether I was cursed, whether my being born was an aberration, a stain in reality.

My mother died giving birth to me. As for my father, he never did care much for kids. I even heard rumors that he beat my mother a lot while she was still alive. After she died, he needed a place to vent his rage and frustration, so he turned to me.

Domestic violence and child abuse does not even begin to describe what he put me through. I thought about retaliation many times, but after looking at his huge future and my tiny, feeble frame, I realized that I would never stand a chance.

“Should I just end it…?”

I asked myself this many times, but… I just couldn’t do it. Killing myself would bring me relief, freeing me from the agony I endured on a daily basis, yet I could never find it within me to take my life.

Was I scared of dying? Yes!

But there was one other reason I refused to end my existence.

“One day… Someday, they’ll have what’s coming to them… And I want to see it when that happens!”

The idea of revenge kept me going. I thought if I endured hard enough then someday, karma would finally turn in my favor.

It never did.

And so 16 years of my miserable life passed. Fortunately, my father was not entirely useless. He still left money for my upkeep, though he always lorded over me for this.

“Useless punk! You still trouble your old man for money at this age?! When I was your age, I had already started earning my bucks. Tch, spoilt and entitled kid!” He would always say.

Still, he would leave me funds. Perhaps he considered it as hush money, for me to keep quiet about his constant abuse of me.

I used the money I got to take care of myself, treating the several wounds and burn marks I had. I never considered reporting him anyway. In this world, I learned that there’s no one you can trust, no one but yourself.

“I’m just pathetic, aren’t I?”

Yes, I hate the world… But I also despise myself for being so weak and powerless against the rushing tides of unfairness in this harsh reality.

The House was hell!

The School was hell!

Everywhere… Was Hell!

My room remained the only place of safety for me, surrounded by the comforting silence and dark embrace of security. Before I knew it, I had become entirely withdrawn and reclusive. I had no ties or interaction with the world, nor anyone in it.

“Novels. Manga. Anime. Games. Sleep. Food.” Those were the only things I needed… Those were the only things that mattered to me.

The world of fiction and fantasy, where I could dream of my father and several others who wronged me as dead. I could freely fantasize about mutilating them several times, using various methods. I could constantly rape the girls who humiliated me publicly, violating them as they screamed for mercy while I drown in the pleasure of their scream and the squishing sounds of my flesh pounding against theirs.

The vivid picture melted in my brain as I held on to my dark fantasies to soothe the gnawing pangs of loneliness and hate that swirled within me constantly.

“Hey, Jeremy is looking at Melissa weirdly again! What a pervert, lol”

“Who knows what’s going on in his twisted head anyways”

“Only the devil, lol. I’m sure they’re best friends!”

The consistent insults of my peers always rang in my head. And when I reported to the teachers, naïve about the way of the world… They proved to me once again that it was meaningless to fight against the cruel fate I was born into.

“Uh? Were you really looking at her in that way?” The Teacher said.

Is that what’s actually important, right now?

“They must just be teasing you. Stop taking things too seriously, Jeremy… That’s why you don’t have any friends” Another one interjected

No, that’s not the reason why…

“You should really try talking to them some more… They can’t be as bad as you say they are!”

But, they are…

“I understand you, Jeremy… You must be really lonely, right? You want a friend, don’t you? We all need someone to share our time with, but I don’t see you with anyone”

That’s not what I need… You don’t understand…

Condescending words from everyone flood my brain, talking like they can relate to an oddity like myself. However, it’s all the same, even with them too.

“That Jeremy kid is such a handful”

“Yeah, why did I have to be the homeroom teacher of such a problem child… Sigh, I hope he doesn’t cause me too much trouble…”

“You need to make him behave!”

Passing through the Teacher’s lounge and hearing them say these words took away what little respect I had for them, the ones who are meant to be the guides of children… had clearly given up on me.

But that wasn’t all…

“Oi, I heard you were staring at my girl this afternoon, Lewis!”

The School top dog, and my nemesis, Daniel, looked at me with a menacing glare.

“N-N-No… I-I… I wasn’t…” I stuttered to say my piece to the overwhelming presence before me.

“Shut it, pipsqueak!” Daniel said, using the back of his hand to slap me, sending my frail body crashing to the ground.

He cracked his knuckles and approached me.

“It seems you don’t know your place… Even going to report her friends to the teachers… You’re dead meat, Lewis. Your life ends here!”

As he battered me with blows from his tough fists, coupled with kicks from his friends, I groaned and grunted in pain, screaming for help desperately. However, my cries were in vain.

No one cared to help… Especially when it was poor, ugly, and weird Jeremy Lewis.

My voice slowly turned hoarse and fell silent altogether. As the bangs and pounds kept sending my body through pain, I suddenly wondered how they got to know about my report… And what the teachers said to me concerning friends.

These people couldn’t be my friends… No one could… I was nothing more than garbage to everyone!

“It hurts… It hurts so much…” My brain rang out.

The pain became too overbearing for me that I quickly withdrew into my room. In my mind, I created my haven, hiding under my blanket in the dark expanse of warmth and safety.

I closed my eyes and fantasized about how it would feel if I could return just a tiny fraction of the pain inflicted on me to the ones who stood over me and battered me with bruises.

If I could return this pain I received, if I could watch them writhe in agony and scream their lungs out in desperation and pain… Ah, how good that would feel…

Taking pleasure in this, I fell unconscious.

Daniel did as he promised. He ended my school life after that moment. Making a public spectacle of me, he made sure everyone treated me like trash, even worse than filth.

I was subjected to bullying from everyone, irrespective of age, or grade.

No one was beneath me, I was the least in the school, as a student, and as a human.

Bread shuttle, Toilet cleaner, punching bag, errand boy, Homework writer, human stool… You name it!

Finally, something within me broke.

And I finally accepted things the way they were… For that was my fate.

“It won’t hurt as much if I just stop fighting against it… This is me…”

Or is it?!

I refuse to accept it… I refuse everything! I waited for a chance to become strong, and finally, the opportunity was here! The Apocalypse is here, and with it, everyone has had a head start from me already!

But, I’m not giving up!

I won’t die here!

I’ll survive no matter what it takes… that’s what I’ve always done. That won’t change now!

“So get up, Jeremy! Get up and fight!”

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