abcnovels
Chapter 63 Bitch Spray!
Chapter 63 Bitch Spray!
Hugo paced back and forth in the lavish guest room of Sanchez's mansion, his nerves running wild.
His thoughts were racing like a hamster on an energy drink. "Alright, 150 UHS Points," he muttered under his breath, counting on his fingers as if the math needed extra confirmation.
"That's enough for three spins of the gift box wheel. Three spins. Surely I'll get something good. I mean, the odds can't be that bad… right?"
He paused, staring at the ceiling as though the System itself might offer reassurance.
"Even if my luck is trash-tier, at least one spin has to land me something decent. A sex weapon? A charm? A magic… I don't know… love potion?"
Hugo's hopeful expression quickly crumbled as a darker thought crept in. 'What if I get three pieces of garbage?'
He slapped his cheeks hard enough to leave red marks. "No! Don't jinx it! Tonight's mission is way too important!" His voice wavered with panic.
"If I don't win Lisa over tonight, I've only got a week left before—before…" He gulped dramatically, envisioning his worst-case scenario. "Before I take the one way flight to see my great grandpa!"
His pacing quickened. "But wait… maybe I should get some good luck candles. Oh no! The shop's near the school, and I'm stuck here in the middle of nowhere!"
He groaned, flopping onto the bed like a deflated balloon. "I should've stocked up before coming here. Stupid, stupid Hugo."
Hugo clasped his hands together, looking skyward—or at least, ceiling-ward. "Oh, great goddess of luck," he began, his tone bordering on theatrical.
"Lady Fortuna, queen of jackpots and gambling addicts everywhere, I know I haven't always been a good boy. But please, PLEASE bless me with just one decent spin. I'll never waste points on useless things again! Cross my heart!"
Just as he was about to pull up the System interface for his first spin, the door slammed open with a bang that nearly made him jump out of his skin.
A man and a woman stumbled in, giggling and pawing at each other like drunken college students.
The man, a round-faced, greasy-haired individual with the kind of confidence only alcohol could provide, pointed a stubby finger at Hugo.
"Oi! What're you doing here? This is my room!" the man slurred.
Hugo blinked. "Uh, no, this is my room. YOU'RE the intruder."
"Your room?" the man sneered, already unbuttoning his shirt. "This is my room now. Get lost. We need privacy."
Hugo blinked. "Privacy? For what?"
The man grinned lasciviously. "What do you think, Einstein? I'm about to—"
"Stop!" Hugo held up a hand. "I don't need details! And you!" He turned to the woman, who was now examining the doorframe as if contemplating escape. "Ma'am, you deserve better. A lobotomised chicken deserves better."
"Hey!" the man snapped, offended.
"Oh, sorry," Hugo shot back sarcastically. "Did I hurt your non existent feelings? Go find another room! I'm in the middle of some very important system business."
The man's face turned an alarming shade of red. "Fine, you little worm, stay here and rot! But mark my words, you'll have bad luck for the rest of the day!"
"Oh, please," Hugo shot back, rolling his eyes. "Bad luck? I'm already stuck with you ruining my night. Can't get worse than this."
The man huffed, grabbing the woman's hand and stomping out. "Fine, enjoy your miserable life, loser!" He slammed the door behind him.
Hugo let out a long sigh, rubbing his temples. "Great. Just what I needed—an ugly troll wishing bad luck on me. Fantastic start to the night."
He opened the System interface and hovered over the spin button. "Alright, focus, Hugo. This is it. Time to turn things around!"
He pressed the button, watching the virtual wheel spin with all the intensity of a slot machine. His heart raced as the wheel slowed… and stopped.
[Ding! Congratulations! You've won... Trash grade Lucky Backscratcher!]
Hugo stared at the text, his brain grinding to a halt. The item materialised in his hand—a cheap wooden backscratcher with the words I CURSE YOU! etched into the handle.
The scream that followed could have woken the dead. "A BACKSCRATCHER?! WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS? SCRATCH MY WAY TO SUCCESS?!"
He threw the offending item onto the bed, where it bounced harmlessly. "This is your fault!" he yelled at the door. "That ugly idiot actually cursed me! A cultivator of the evil sect!"
Pacing again, he muttered to himself. "Alright, no big deal. One spin down, two to go. Still plenty of chances to win something good. Come on, lady luck, don't fail me now! You can redeem yourself!"
He clasped his hands together again, offering a quick but desperate prayer. "Please, Fortuna. I'll build you a shrine. I'll sacrifice… uh, something. Just don't let me down!"
He pressed the spin button again, watching the wheel turn with bated breath. Slower… slower… and stop.
[Ding! Congratulations! You've won... Trash grade extra lucky sock!]
Hugo let out a strangled scream as the sock materialized in his hands. It was mismatched, had a hole at the toe, and—most insultingly—also bore the words I CURSE YOU!
"This has to be a joke." Hugo's voice trembled with suppressed rage. "A SOCK?! A USED SOCK?! WHO DESIGNS THIS SYSTEM?!"
He sniffed it cautiously, recoiled, and threw it at the backscratcher. "I'm going to burn this place down. I swear, I'll—"
He took a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down. "Okay, Hugo, chill. One last spin. No prayers, no begging, no theatrics. Just do it and get it over with."
With a grim expression, he pressed the button. He didn't pray. He didn't hope. He just watched, dead-eyed, as the wheel spun.
The wheel spun, slower and slower, until it finally stopped.
[Ding! Congratulations! You've won... Magical grade Bitch Spray!]
Hugo blinked at the screen. Then he read the description:
[Bitch Spray: Instantly increases the lust of women within a 3-metre radius. Duration: 9 minutes. Usage Limit: 3 Times.]
For a moment, there was silence. Then, Hugo's face split into the wildest grin he'd ever worn.
A deranged laugh bubbled out of him, growing louder and more unhinged until it filled the room.
"This… THIS IS IT!" he cackled, clutching the bottle like it was a holy relic. "Forget candles, forget shrines! Lady Fortuna, you're my girl! Bitch Spray—what a name! What a legend!"
He fell onto the bed, laughing so hard his sides ached. "Lisa doesn't stand a chance. Tonight, Hugo's got this in the bag!"
[So sorry for the lack of updates. Faced some problems IRL. Thankfully, they're all solved now so expect daily updates again!]