The Discarded, Half-Eaten Apple Core New Life

That's some Dumb Stuff, Larry.

I bet you guessed the wrong Mythic evolution, dear reader.

Yggdrasil graft? No, thank you. Don't want to become sessile. System Core? Getting yeeted to another world? Pfft. True Hero? Where have all the good men gone, indeed?

That left me with two choices. Divine Dungeon and Mana Dynamo.

My choice was really easy. Mana Dynamo... was fucking boring. Also, what is this about cleansing and improving the world? For free? This Class must have the most ridiculous Mana generation bonuses ever to be worth it. If I wanted more Mana, all I had to do was to plant more trees. Easy peasy. Give me a hundred million square feet of land and I'll plant a million trees and get a million base DM per day. Multiplied by Willpower. Boo. You're out. Also, it was totally a meme choice based on Delve by SenescentSoul. Used to come out every Sunday before the world went to shit.

I mean, even if Mana Dynamo gave me tens of millions of DM per day for free, which I was sure it fucking didn't or it would be broken, It still paled in comparison with the other one.

Okay, answer this honestly. Who would pass the opportunity to become A FUCKING GOD?

A.

Fucking.

God.

Muahahahaha. I shall smite the Infernali with lightning from the heavens. And if that failed, I still had the rockets. But change that Class name because we don't want trouble with Dakota Krout.

I made my choice and pressed the big fucking "Yes!" button. There was no such button.

I dumped the 885 points into Willpower.

The difference was that Traits were always on. Perks needed to be turned on and off, and I could only have six Perks active at any time.

"I only gained six extra Perks," I told Marshall.

"Fuck you," he broke character. "You'll get more Perks from your new Class when you level the old one again as a Sub-Class. But you might never again gain another Perk from the old one."

"I think I can live with that." The synthetic voice didn't convey my emotions.

He stared at me. "I can't say if you are being honest or sarcastic. Damn robot."

"Let me see if I unlocked any (Legendary) subs."

I think that's cool but I was sort of pressed for time. But being a demonic tree? Too sessile for me.

Dude. Another Class they were trying to push into me. Also, the difference between rarities was way less pronounced when they were all sub-Classes. The quality of the Perks might be a bit better and the Class Skill stronger but it was too minute. Synergy was more important than cool shit.

An upgraded version of the Techno-Wizard? The first Class I saw with two generic classifications.

Yeah. That one smells like a lawsuit.

Ugh. What is considered the beginning? The moment I was killed during the initial invasion? The landfill?

Pact with whom? Nah. Too risky.

Free Waifu ticket? I don't need any Valkyries. But this was the last Legendary entry available.

No. I had two slots. The next one was 23 levels away. Probably five long years. I needed to get something that gave me synergy. Yeah. Fuck that. I just needed to blow eight whales in a raid and bam, new Class choice.

I was overthinking this shit. My main way of fighting was with guns. Pick the Class that says "guns" and get over it. The worst that can happen is that I have to drop the Class again, keeping a Skill and Perk for my troubles.

The System wouldn't screw me over, would it? I pressed "yes" with my mind.

Oh, God ( I mean, me ) what have I done? I should've overthinked! Overthinking is good!

Something furry and weird appeared before me.

*

*

"Marshall," I called him to let him know I had finished my selection. Also, to ask him if he was seeing the weird furry thing floating in front of me. I doubted he was. He wasn't staring at it.

"You're level 176 at least! and 184 at most!" Marshall said. That's the level range where a (Mythic) gives six more Perks than a (Legendary).

I stared at him. Then at the thing. I didn't want to talk about the thing. Or talk to the thing.

"What's your level? Since you so rudely deduced mine and stated it out loud."

"Two hundred and five."

"Fine. Now, do you see anything odd defying the laws of physics?"

"Contractor, he can't see me!" The thing said.

Perhaps I should say something about the thing. It had a beak, fur, flipper paws, poison spurs, and a flat paddle-like tail. My power animal was a platypus.

"Marshall, I think I need some time to process my Status changes."

The man reacted better than I thought. "Okay. See you tomorrow."

He just walked away. The floating platypus did a somersault in the air. "You can talk to me with your mind, contractor!" The thing seemed happy.

"Okay!" I thought. "What the hell are you?"

The platypus giggled, "I'm your magical mascot! Together, we will defeat the Infernali!"

"Can the System drug people?"

"NO!" The magical mascot cried in horror. "I don't like that you are implying I'm a hallucination, contractor."

But I definitely thought it was a hallucination. First, "why can't Marshall see you?"

"I'm invisible to everyone but the contractor unless I wish to be seen!"

"How can you fly?"

"I'm magical!" More giggles. "You can fly too!"

Fair.

"Try using your transformation!"

Against my best judgment, I decided I should give it a try. Fuck. We're doing this.

*

*

"How do I do this?" I asked.

"Say, Purin, Kurin, Kuririn! Magical transformation!"

I grimaced. "I'm dropping the Class. I bet Heavy Gunner works just fine to boost my combat ability. No way in Hell you'll make me say this."

A stray thought flashed in my mind. "If I drop this Class, do you vanish?"

"No. I'm not a Trait, you made a contract with me! A System contract. I provide you with guidance, companionship, and incentive. And you fight the Infernali. Just that. When you signed the contract, the System transported me here."

"So are you a summon?"

"Also no. I can assure you I'm not an evil creature. And yes, that's what an evil creature would say. But I'm not." The platypus fidgeted with its..."

"Are you a boy or a girl?"

"A boy! We, magical mascots match the gender of our contractors. I know you are a Dungeon Core but you think of yourself as male."

"What happened if I picked the Valhalla Class?"

"The System would bring the Valkyrie here."

"How do you know that?"

"I can access some System information if it is related to you."

"The time loop option, when would it send me back?"

"To the start of the invasion. But it is a very bad choice. We need to defend the seed!"

"How long until the World Tree sprouts?"

"Classified!"

"Can you fight?"

"Nope. I'm just a mascot. I'll give lots of hugs and moral support!"

"Any way to transform without saying that stupid shit?"

"Aww..." It tried to look cute and goofy.

"I'm serious. Look, it seems you were tossed into it by the System but we can work with that. But I refuse to say stupid for just a 3% Attribute bonus."

D'aww!" It did a little jig.

"I'm serious. That stuff might work with humans but not with me."

"Fine. You can just think the words."

I didn't answer or think anything. Well, other than the will to not think.

"You can ask me. I'll trigger it for you."

"Okay. Let's test this thing."

The platypus materialized. "Purin, Kurin, Kuririn!" The damn beast shouted.

I was expecting a light show and ribbons. Instead, power flowed to my Core and I felt myself bulge. For two seconds, everything was light. Then I looked at myself with my Domain. My Core had transformed into a perfectly smooth and round red crystal apple. Complete with the crystal stem. No longer half-eaten and rotten. It was...

Whatever. It's not like I cared about my appearance at this conjecture.

"How do I level this Skill?"

"Use the transformation and fight Infernali while using it."

I looked at the thousands of notifications for zero Exp that rolled in every minute from the automated weapons.

"Oh, really?"

"yeah. When do we fight?"

Now that was the kind of synergy I wanted. I grinned at the platypus. "My secret is that I'm always angry. I mean, fighting."