The Grand Mistress

Chapter 159 - Instant Regret

What happened that day left a pretty bad scar on Simione and to be able to think well, she had not come home to the Tang's mansion. She just had no courage to do so and so she politely phoned the couple—Madam Silicia and grandfather William to cancel their dinner that day. Of course the couple knew something was up and it wasn't long until the servants in the Tang mansion told them about what happened. Lyndon Tang didn't deny the thing and told his grandparents the truth however, that he had outgrown his lover over the girl and that he had found a new love.

Of course the couple chided Lyndon for a while and was worried about Simione but knowing that she had gone to tend to her broken heart, they just let her mourn for a while. They knew Simione would come home eventually as she had really no place to stay apart from the Tang mansion. Besides, Lyndon promised he would bring home the girl no matter what as even though he had found new love, he cannot let go of the fact that the girl was still his responsibility. He felt obligated to care for her specially that whatever happened to her life, he had some share of contribution to it.

After a week of looking where Simione went, Lyndon found her in Comis Village. The girl somehow managed to travel that far after what she discovered in the Tang's mansion and had gone to the remote mountains where the two of them used to frequents. When they were little, it was always the girl's wish ever summer to go and volunteer in the Comis Village's orphanage and so the couple—Madam Silicia and grandfather William's thought it was a good activity for the two and so instead of allowing Simione to go, they always send Lyndon with her. Such activity continued until they had gotten old and so Comis village had been somehow closely related to their life. It was a sentimental place too because right in such a place, Lyndon confessed his love for the girl two years ago. Simione was sixteen years old at that time and Lyndon who had been fond of her for long realized that the seed of brotherly love he had kept for her had turned into love and for once, thought that the girl was sent to hise to be his wife. 

And so, this was how their relationship bloomed. Simione, who was then so naive of everything, had easily  fallen for him too. How could she not? All her life, Lyndon was always her dear brother, her protector and the man who had shown him the most importance in her small little world and so when Lyndon confessed, she accepted it and entrusted the man to her heart.

"Sisi," he started. He had found her in solitude under an old oak tree just inside the backyard of the orphanage. The girl, even when she knew he had arrived, refused to welcome him and withdrew to somewhere where she could have her peace. 

"Hi," Simione returned coldy, eyes fixated at the greenery before her. She had told nobody about what took place in the Tang's mansion and so everyone in the Comis village thought nothing was wrong with the couple.

"I've called you...a hundred times," Lyndon sighed and decided to sit beside her under the old oak tree. Simione's apathy of his presence right then for some reasons made him uncomfortable as she had never treated him that cold before. Whenever he came home, Simione was always warm and full of smiles like nothing in this world can make her ever happy but  him. However right then, there was no joy in Simione's aura and he definitely did not excite as he previously did.

"Sisi, what I did is beyond comprehension," He admitted and was sincere with his apologies. "I should have never done it with you but….I was so cowardly of telling you the truth. I fear that you would hate me like you are right now. I certainly did not want this to happen with us,"

Simione did not reply, did not even give him a glimpse of concern. It seemed that from the two of them, it was Lyndon who was having a hard time with their broken relationship because just seemed to not care at all.

"Sisi...you can hate me. I will accept all your hate but please don't hate her," The mention of the woman he loved then was unavoidable but he cannot let this thing happen between them cause more scar and chaos. The two women, his current love and Simione had a long history of unpleasant affairs brough by issues of family and Lyndon doesn't want what happened between him and SImione caused more complications on their already complicated past. "This is entirely not her fault. She did not intend to hurt you, it was all my doing. I just fell out of love and I one day I realized how I much I loved her,"

"But of course I couldn't hurt you...and so I kept this for a while. I didn't mean to lie forever, I was just trying to find the right timing," Lyndon reasoned further. "I know you hate me so much now but please Sisi don't blame anyone on this but me,"

"I am not blaming anyone," Simione answered after a while. To hear Lyndon pleading for her forgiveness was making  her soft toward him but what he did was something she could just forgive easily. He did not only break her heart, he broke her trust and whatever was left of their good relationship. She felt like she had been betrayed and no matter what his reasons were, he did hurt her beyond words. "I just wished you could have been honest with me. After everything, if you can't keep your promise and your love to me, you could have kept the trust that I reposted on you. However, you chose to betray me instead,"

"I didn't want to hurt you Sisi,"

"You know I'll eventually be hurt anyway so you could have gone straight and be honest with me than playing fire behind my back with that shit of a woman,"

"Sisi didn't say that. She had done nothing wrong and she was just—"

"No matter what you say, you can never erase the fact that she was the other woman. She knew about you and I and if she couldn't keep her hands away from you, she should have the decency to wait until the two of us was over," 

"Sisi! I never thought you could be this shallow. I know you and her had not been okay but if you think she did this to piss you or to betray you, you are wrong. I was the one to come to her, I was the one to made her do this," hearing Lyndon taking all the blame for that woman hurt even more yet Simione could do nothing but just swallow all the pain.

"Perhaps you are right, perhaps you aren't. You had never really believed me about the things she did all these years, nobody believes me really, so I can't really blame you. I just wished that one day, you'll never get to find the truth of what I say because it surely it will break you a thousand times than it broke me,"

"She isn't like Sisi. I knew you both. I saw you growing both and even before you came, we were already friends.She isn't like what you are saying everyone she is. It's just that you and her had been at great odds because of some  circumstances beyond your control. No one was to be blamed for it but just fate. Please Sisi, I wished someday, you could learn to accept the fact that she really had nothing to do with that happened to you,"

"Perhaps you are right brother Don, perhaps you aren't," Simione replied. She had long accepted the fact that no one was going to believe all her side of the story. She had no evidence of anything anyway that could prove all her claims were right. All she had were hunches and assumptions and Brother Don was right, perhaps she was really wrong about everything, "Whatever it is, I wished you a happy life with her,"

"Do you really mean that?" Lyndon asked desperately. He never quite expected that Simione's being angry with him would turn out to be this frustrating and bothersome. When he was in London and was thinking about how to end things with her, he thought that her reaction would be something bearable. Seeing her fury and hurt right before his eyes, Lyndon knew he underestimated the frustration he got out of it. He never expected to hurt like this—like something inside your stomach and heart was being painfully flocked out slowly and right then he thought if Simione felt the same, or worse.

To be honest, he had never been so sorry, as much as he was then and yet, even when he was, Simione' seemed like she didn't care—and that only added up more pain to what he was bearing in his heart. Right away, a big portion in his heart was regretting what he did.