The Principle of a Philosopher by Eternal Fool “Asley”

Chapter 331: A Big Fight

Chapter 331: A Big Fight

“…!”

Oh, she’s finally awake!

All right, we succeeded in getting her out. I was afraid that she was going to die, but her heart was beating, so I had been worrying over nothing.

“Good morning… or evening, I guess. Here, drink this if you’re still feeling tired. It’s the Pochibitan D!”

“W-what is this place…?”

Lylia took a look around.

This is the Far East Wasteland. It should be safe to assume that Lylia doesn’t recognize the landscape here.

“A wasteland to the east of Royal Capital Regalia.”

“Royal Capital? Don’t you mean the Holy City?”

“Well, It’s been five thousand years since we defeated the Devil King. A lot of things have changed.”

“Five thousand years… Hmm…”

Lylia doesn’t seem all that surprised.

Well, I shouldn’t be surprised, either. She did seal herself so that she’d be here to fight the Devil King again, after all.

She must have been prepared to appear in a world different from what she knew, however big that difference may be.

“Heh, this thing is as delicious as I remember it.”

Lylia smiled, refreshed by the Pochibitan D.

Ngh, for some reason, Lylia’s looking quite… attractive. She really HAS changed from when I last saw her.

Quite a few decades must have passed for her after we defeated the Devil King. Well, nothing shocking, I suppose…

“What about Bright and Chappie? Are they here?”

…And here comes something shocking.

I mean, did I hear that right?

“”Huh?””

Pochi and I blurted out at the same time, looking at Lylia with surprise.

“Bright and Chappie. And perhaps Ferris, as well… You haven’t met them?”

“Uh, well, I do Chappie might be out there somewhere, but Bright and Ferris? Why do you think they’d still be around in this era?”

Seeing me utterly confused by her question, Lylia stared me down and stood herself up, looking perfectly calm all the while.

“Why do you think they’re not? We all worked together against all odds to kill the Devil King once already — why would you disregard the almost impossible chances of Bright and Ferris still being alive?”

The way Lylia looked at me was pressuring enough to make me stay silent.

Ngh… she’s become much more mentally mature, too. Her current attitude is quite different from that of the Lylia I used to know.

“So, what do you think, Master?”

From the look in Pochi’s eyes, she’s being more serious than she has ever been.

Of course she is — we’re talking about the possibility of our adopted son and my former students being still alive.

“Almost impossible means it’s not impossible, yes, but for Bright and Ferris to be alive after all this time, they would have to… Wait. Did they distill the Drop of Eternity?”

“That’s it! That HAS to be it, Master! They must’ve taken the Drop of Eternity and are adventuring somewhere out there!”

“That’s very unlikely. VERY unlikely.”

And of course, it was T?s who promptly rained on Pochi’s parade.

Lylia turned around and was stunned to see T?s’ figure towering over her.

“…Asley, who’s this? Another Familiar of yours?”

She said as she pointed at T?s, though she doesn’t seem particularly disturbed by his appearance.

This got me thinking… is there even an actual Familiar that looks like him?

“He’s an Elf like you, actually — named T?s. Don’t you remember him from the Familiar Chalice?”

“Long time no see, eh, Lylia?”

And then there was a moment of silence–

“Master, Master! Look how awesome the people gathered here are! A legendary hero, a Philosopher, a Heavenly Beast… and a Fool! So exciting!”

–Nope, of course there’s no silence when she’s around.

“What the hell!? I’m a legendary hero too, you know! And why was I last on the list!? Hey, you furball! Don’t look away! Why’re are even getting excited, anyway!? Look here, you little shit! Hey! HEY! Don’t look the other way, damn it!”

“”Pipe down, Asley.””

“Ah… ‘kay.”

And now there IS silence despite Pochi still being around… thanks to T?s and Lylia’s intimidation.

I mean, this is indeed a gathering of super awesome people, but why’d she have to go out of her way to exclude me!?

“Anything less than full dedication to your training never would have gotten you this big and bulky. I see you’ve been torturing yourself — quite surprising for someone who used to be a lazy bum like you.”

“Hah! And look at you — here because you wanna be with Asley. Quite an obsession, eh, Lylia?”

Huh?

Why does the air between them feel… hostile?

This is the first time I’ve seen two Elves talk to each other, and both of them have quite strong personalities… Man, is this going to get dangerous?

“All that training did nothing to help you grow your character, I see!”

“‘Oh, Asley… We finally meet again!’ Bleh, makes me wanna barf!”

Apparently, humans are creatures with exceptional ability to sense incoming danger.

A beast-turned-Familiar like Pochi seems to be no exception, too. The both of us took one step, and then another, away from the two Elves.

“Watch the words that come out of your mouth, T?s. You don’t have your ears anymore — you are a disgrace to our people!”

“And you’re an Elf who’s attracted to humans — you’re no better!”

A storm of arcane energy started raging.

Pochi and I started shaking and jumped to stick together.

“W-w-w-wait, wait wait… Lylia and Sir T?s are ENEMIES!?”

“Hell no, they’re not! But both of them do have pretty inflated egos, so… arguments are bound to happen every once in a while — WHUH–!?”

Suddenly, Lylia was in the air, her right fist striking T?s on the cheek.

T?s stood his ground, barely managing to keep his body from collapsing.

Instead, Lylia’s fist seemed to be stuck in T?s’ cheek wrinkles; she was then blown away when T?s shook his head.

“HAAAAAAHHHHHH!”

“KAAAAAAHHHHHH!”

And so, for a few moments, a fistfight more thrilling than a turf war between two SS-ranked monsters unfolded before our eyes.

Pochi and I sat down and enjoyed the spectacle from a good distance.

T?s doesn’t use his magic, and Lylia doesn’t draw her swords, either.

They’re just going at each other with their fists.

“You’re a Heavenly Beast, right, Pochi? C’mon, go in and stop them.”

“W-what are you saying, Master!? Aren’t you a legendary hero!? You’re more capable of stopping them than I am!”

“Nope, I’m just a fool! Your words, not mine!”

“Well, I’m just a Pochi, then!”

“Hey, you could at least say you’re the Fool’s Familiar, you know!”

“Absolutely not, sir! I’m too cute for that — I mean, wasn’t that why you got rid of that title for me in the first place!?”

“Cute!? You wish you were! I did it because you were pitiful! And because I’m not a heartless monster, that’s why! Stop daydreaming already!”

“Pitiful!? You’re one to talk, Master! You’ve been doing nothing but lose fights lately! You’re no legendary hero — just a fool! Calling you a fool might be an insult to actual fools!”

“Well, a dog like you isn’t even supposed to have the Heavenly Beast title in the first place!”

“What did you just say!?”

“You got a problem with that!?”

“Nothing changes the fact that you’re just a fool!”

“And you’re just a furball!”

??????????

When I came to my senses, all four of us were flat on the ground, looking up at the sky.

At some point while Pochi and I were arguing with each other, T?s and Lylia shouted at us, telling us to pipe down… and then they started punching us, turning their fight into a four-way brawl.

I never thought it would happen this way, but I felt that the fistfight had actually helped us communicate with one another in various ways. This is probably what it means to ‘let the fists do the talking’.

“Hah hah hah… S-so, getting back on topic… What’d you mean when you said ‘very unlikely,’ T?s?”

I forced my aching body up and asked T?s as he laid down behind me.

Lylia also got up and turned to look at T?s.

T?s proceeded to sit up as well, then he scratched his head and started talking,

“So I’ve been doing a little research. There’s a rule to where the Drops of Eternity appeared, and how many of them… probably God’s idea.”

Lylia and I looked at each other for a moment, then turned to face T?s.

Pochi seems too tired to get up, though — she’s just lying there, her belly inflating and deflating as she wheezes.

“T’oued. Shamanesses. Ring any bells?”

Kaoru and Jun’ko… Right, they did drink the Drop of Eternity.

I nodded to T?s.

“Asley, you were in the south when you made your Drop of Eternity, right?”

“Huh? Yeah, I guess. I’ve been living in a cave to the south of Faltown for… forever, pretty much.”

I scratched my chin and tried to recall the time when I accidentally made the Drop of Eternity.

Still, what is T?s trying to get at here?

There’s a rule to where the Drop of Eternity appeared? And it was God’s idea?

“You know where the Elf village is, Lylia?”

“…It’s to the north of Regalia.”

“Right, and that’s where I made my Drop of Eternity. Strange, isn’t it? The thing just appeared in so many different places, all apart from each other.”

That’s… true.

Considering that, though, shouldn’t there be one in the west as well? Wait, no, that can’t be — it’s nothing but mountains in that region. And past those mountains, there’s nothing but the empty sea.

I drew a simple map on the ground and tilted my head.

T?s proceeded to point at the map and say,

“When the Devil King was killed, God must’ve taken that chance to make sure that he’s killed again the next time around — And so He made the Drops of Eternity appear in this world to help humans prepare for the fight.”

“True. God couldn’t have used His power effectively if not during that time period.”

Lylia nodded in agreement with T?s’ guess.

“So, you’re following me so far? There’s likely one more place where the Drop of Eternity was made…”

“But there’s no civilization in the west–“

“–No, think about it again.”

When I pointed at the western region of the map, T?s pointed at a different spot instead.

“…Aha.”

He’s hovering his finger over the central region.

Right, God didn’t use his power during this era, but in the era that followed the Devil King’s defeat.

So the central region in this case is… not quite the Royal Capital.

“It’s Regalia… when it was the Holy City.”