Chapter 75 Goddess Of Life (1)
Chapter 75 Goddess Of Life (1)
?"You want her attention."
Xia Tian smiled and gave his verdict.
??
"Attention?..." Zeng Mingxia muttered.
She did not understand anything.
Whose attention does she want?
His words were too vague.
It can be said, Xia Tian purposely throws off a vague sentence before saying his real words to make people confused.
But why does he does that?
Rather than explaining things directly, why does he goes around his way and confuse people?
This was not the first time he acted like this, he always does that while talking to people...
But why?
Because he wants to lower their guard and make them more honest and accepting.
If he directly explains the reason, most people would try to defend themselves instead of self-reflecting upon themselves.
They would find his words too judging.
So the old fox first throws them off-guard and then comes to the real topic.
He first asks the question, then let them think and be curious for themselves, and once they arrive at a point where they can't find answers for themselves, he answers what he believes to be true.
It is the art of asking questions by ancient Greek philosophers.
Nobody likes to be judged by another person, so if we directly point out things in other people's behavior they will get defensive of us.
So the best way is to always reply to them with a question, which will force them to think.
The old fox knows his art and has mastered it.
Once he saw that Zeng Mingxia was struggling with herself, he extended a hand around her shoulder and pulled her closer to himself.
!?
The woman felt startled, but somehow the warmth coming from his body made her feel comfortable.
She relaxed her body.
She has never felt like this... This sense of security ...
It was clear he was weaker than her... Still, she felt strangely safe...
Humans are weird beings... They want to be cared for by someone else...
Most of the time they are just some hard shells outside while consumed by their insecurities inside.
No one wants to take responsibility for themselves, everyone wants to be taken care of by someone else.
It is something that we learn when we are small... As small as the size of a hand... When we are just born...
Before we become toddlers and are completely helpless.
Although most of us forget our memories of childhood, it always stays in our mind and leaves a deep impact on our day-to-day behavior.
When we are children, we felt helpless... Insecure...
Then there comes a guardian who provides us with a sense of security...
He or she provides us with food, water, shelter, and all the basic things which we need.
We learn to be dependent as a child.
We learn the feeling of dependency...
Although that dependency fades away with time yet it lies deep within our minds.
Thus when we become adults, most of us became alone and start searching for that same dependency again.
That same snuggle .... made us feel secure in childhood...
We want to be dependent again... Life feels too unfair... Hard... We don't want to take it anymore...
If only for a few seconds... We just want to go in that same embrace ... Free from all responsibilities...
This is also one of the reasons physical touch is one of the most effective ways to establish rapport because it reminds us of that same secure warmth that we earlier felt in childhood.
[A/N: Well, today many people must have realized for the first time the reason behind physical touch being the best means to communicate feelings.]
Thus we search for a partner... Not partner but that same warm embrace...
And here begins the pursuit of finding out partner...
We again start behaving like kids... We cuddle... We feel safe... We start being dependent again...
We love that warmth .... This feeling of being free from responsibilities... Most of us want to be kids again... Yet we fear exposing ourselves... We hate the feeling of being helpless like a kid... As an adult, we are always defended... There are walls constructed around us... We don't often break these walls...
[A/N: Please remember the above lines, I would connect it when I explain this topic further during Long Wanhui's R18 scene. Within the next 10-30 chapters I would wrap this topic up.]
The walls around Zeng Mingxia's heart were broken now, she was reminded of that same feeling again.
She started feeling comfortable.
Memories of her mother rushed through her brain...
The gentle woman started feeling anxious for the first time...
Is her mother alright?
She can't help but worry for the first time...
Her eyelashes fluttered with worry.
It can be said, Zeng Shuang was treated as the youngest and was the most insecure, which is why she was the first one to start searching for her mother.
Xia Tian did not care about her looks, he found an opportunity to use his sacred art of dao of bullshit after a long time...
He started explaining to Zeng Mingxia...
That why she was following her mother's words...
That why all three sisters behave differently...
That why Zeng Shuang was the first one to leave to search for her mother...
That why she felt responsible for her other sister...
That why Zeng Qingge didn't come to find her mother or her sister...
All her questions will be answered...
All three sisters were siblings.
But the strange thing about siblings is they affect each other without even realizing it.
That is called sibling dynamics.
Have you ever seen siblings with the same competence?
Like if one sibling is gentle and good at maths... The other sibling also has the same personality and is good at maths.
Probably not right?
Siblings always develop different yet contrasting personalities...
Now many of you might have seen siblings with the same skill like both siblings being good in maths... But if you look closely you will notice one of them is competing with another, one might be chasing the other ... One might be envying the other and just feeling inferior to him and forever chasing him... Like the big brother is very good at maths, and the small one is also good, but the latter always feels inferior and chases after the former.
Regardless, if we exclude the above case most siblings have different personalities and different interests...
But why do they develop different interests?
It's because they try to compete for their parent's attention!
Now, before coming to any conclusion let's understand the case of Zeng Mingxia first, then each of us can decide for ourselves whether it's true or not...
All the Zeng sisters were born at the same time.
Now, Zeng Mingxia was perceived as the eldest child by the Immortal witch.
Thus Zeng Mingxia also perceived herself as the eldest, she started taking responsibility for her other two sisters and taking care of them.
She started following her mother's words and looked up at her.
She developed a gentle persona and obedient behavior.
She felt appreciated and felt happy when her mother praised her for succeeding in her role.
[A/N: You can find the pygmalion effect working here]
After being praised for being the eldest one, her beliefs were further strengthened and she continued to develop that personality.
She got her mother's attention, care, and appreciation by following her words... And being the eldest one.
But what about her other two sisters?
They also wanted their mother's attention!
Immortal Witch was not only her mother but also theirs!
We are born competitive!
If don't believe it, try to observe a few kids playing, you will see how they love competing from birth, two toddlers often run on all four and compete for that who is the fastest.
Competition is in our nature to show our superiority.
Now since Zeng Mingxia was getting all the attention of her mother, the other two felt envy!
They also wanted their mother's attention!
They also wanted to be appreciated!
But they can't just follow after Zeng Mingxia's footsteps and be obedient!
They wanted to be even more appreciated than her!
They wanted more!
So both tried to find their own way to get their mother's attention.
Zeng Qingge, the War goddess, chooses the way to work hard.
She becomes calm and composed, she chooses the way of cultivation.
She decided to get her mother's attention by showing her talent in cultivation.
Gradually but soon she surpassed even Zeng Mingxia.
She got her mother's attention by way of cultivation!
Then, comes Zeng Shuang.
She knew that her other two sisters are extremely talented.
One is gentle and peaceful, while another is calm and thoughtful.
She can't possibly mimic them.
She can't even choose cultivation as both her sisters were already excelling in it.
She chooses to be funny, she chooses to entertain others.
She chooses to be cheerful.
She slowly developed a persona to entertain others.
She got her mother's attention and praise by making her laugh at her jokes.
All three choose their ways...
But in the end, all three were secretly competing for the same goal...
That was attention!
Their personality was different due to the above reason.
All three choose their own way to grab their mother's attention.
This is how siblings work.
We develop contrasting personalities and interests from birth to get out guardians' attention.
All of us carve our own ways, but the end goal is the same.
Siblings affect each other without even realizing it.
As for how Xia Tian guessed their hierarchy?
It was the rule of thumb!
The eldest one is always gentle and responsible for others. He assumes a gentle personality as he had to take care of other siblings.
The youngest one is often mischievous and cheerful.
The middle one often has a perceived inferiority and always feels that his parents ignore him.
The middle one is quite an interesting case to deal with, as in most cases the middle one is most hardworking.
Why?
The reason is simple.
Parents always put their effort into the child which is most young and helpless.
The eldest one is looked at as a role model by the middle one.
When there are only two children, everything goes right until another one is born.
Now the middle child loses the attention of his parents, as it goes towards the youngest one.
Now he does not only envy the eldest but also the youngest sibling.
He can't fight the eldest as he is big.
As for the youngest, he can't fight him as the youngest sibling is still young and under his parent's protection.
The middle one becomes isolated and in the end, chooses to work hard and prove himself.
There will come a time when his achievements soon surpass the other two, but the inferiority complex remains.
Parents had a sweet spot for the first child, as it is their first.
They felt most excited at that time.
[A/N: I need to explain soon why we remember some people more easily while some we don't, so for now, don't think about it. I would explain it using Li Nan, that is how we remember memories.]
The youngest one is most helpless and cared after.
The middle one feels that his spot is taken by the other two, he feels inferior and jealous of them, thus he tries to work hard and excel over the other two.
It is also the fault of the parent's side, as most people have children without even knowing about raising children.
Before having another child they should first prepare the already existing one.
At the same time, they should make sure not to completely neglect the other two children because of the youngest one.
As the eldest one can still understand them as he has already developed his mentality and is responsible and understanding in nature.
But what about the middle one?
He is still young and capable of feeling hurt by their small actions...
Children notice much more than you can imagine, even the smallest action of neglect does not escape their eyes...
As a result, the middle child gets ignored...
And thus there always lies a void deep within his mind...
This is why Zeng Qingge did not search for her mother even now.
She secretly dislikes her mother for ignoring her.
Even though she worked the hardest but her mother only praised the other two.
The younger one did not have any talents, still, her mother laughed at her silly jokes and always took care of her.
The eldest one was often praised for being responsible.
But what about her?
She worked the hardest!
Still, she got ignored!
It is not as if parents don't realize the middle child's problems, they do, but they feel helpless.
As I said, most parents have children without even knowing how to raise one.
The immortal witch was the same, she knew the problem of Zeng Qingge, yet she felt awkward dealing with it.
Just like any other parent she doesn't know how to deal with it, thus the relationship between them got awkward as time passed.
Dealing with is it quite easy, bring all the insecurities and complaints which are deeply hidden within the heart on the surface... But it is not as easy as it looks, you go a bit wrong and it can destroy a child's psychology...
Children are very fragile in their minds... If you are not careful you will break them without even realizing it.
Then comes the youngest one, Zeng Shuang, she sticks to the most with her mother and was the most dependent one among all three sisters.
She was also the most insecure one, the only reason she didn't show on the surface was due to the care of her mother, the parent often spoil the youngest children the most.
Thus, the moment the Immortal witch disappeared, Zeng Shuang was the first one to panic.
She felt strange that how her other two sisters can remain calm.
Zeng Mingxin was calm as she knew to work independently and take care of her sisters.
Zeng Qingge had a hidden grudge in her heart, so she did not care.
In the end, Zeng Shuang ventured alone to find the Immortal Witch.
Soon, she disappeared into this vast universe.
Now, the most responsible sister was ready to take things into her hand and was ready to find her, that is Zeng Mingxin.
The Goddess of life must have asked Zeng Qingge to come along to find Zeng Shuang.
But the War goddess declined her, after all, she had grudges in her heart against the other two sisters as well.
Therefore, Zeng Mingxia came alone to find Zeng Shuang's whereabouts and got kidnapped by Nyx.
After hearing everything Zeng Mingxia can't help but widen her eyes while glancing at Xia Tian.
"Mother said right! You are amazing."
She exclaimed as she hugged him, but the next moment as if electrocuted she separated instantly.
Just now she forget that he was about to eat her or else she would dare not to be intimate with him.
'No! He is a bad daddy! Stay away from him.'
She instantly reminded herself and made an internal note to be more careful of him.
Xia Tian doesn't know whether to laugh or cry at her, somehow he was able to read through her by her ever-changing facial expressions.
This woman was just now embarrassed by her own actions.