The Satan CEO's Woman: He Unexpectedly Fell in Love with Her

Chapter 255 - 254: Regret And Guilt

***(Trigger Warning!!!! There's a part on this chapter that might trigger someone who was having a suicidal thought or had the tendency to do self-harm to oneself. It's not my intention to trigger you guys. But I felt like it would best describe her feelings more. Honestly, this chapter triggered me while I was writing this. If you're uncomfortable when you reached the part, you're free to skip it.)***

"Chairman!" One of the KSA agent exclaimed in fright when she saw that she had bumped into someone.

Eunji dropped herself on a squatting position to pick up her phone which had fallen on the floor. She wanted to see on what object she had bumped into and when she looked up, she realized that she had bumped into an actual person.

"Nathan..." Eunji mumbled softly as a doze of familiar smell invaded her system.

Good thing she immediately stopped herself before he could hear her.

'What the hell is he doing here?' She asked to herself.

Eunji hurriedly stood up and held her phone tightly.

"I'm sorry." She immediately apologized in a low voice which she knew he could hear. She was about to leave the place immediately but Nathan spoke that made her to halt on her steps and her shoulders became stiff as she was tensed.

"Wait!" Nathan called her out to stop her from leaving.

Eunji halted from her steps when she heard his voice making her to panic instantly.

Though she was in her disguise, she could not help not to be nervous when he's around. She had to calm down so she won't be suspicious in his eyes.

Her mind was in a mess when she saw him. Her heart was jumping out of place and her ears were ringing. She knew that if she would stay longer, she might pass out because of anxiety.

Good thing she was not facing him or else he could see her lips trembling that she had to bite them.

He was about to grab her but Eunji dodged his hand. Thus he retracted his hand back to his side and asked her instead.

"Excuse me but do I know you?" He asked her with nervousness evident in his voice.

He wanted to hear her voice clearly for the second time.

The atmosphere suddenly turned tense as he waited for her answer.

Eunji was having an inner battle as she tried to summon the courage to talk and deny his question towards her.

But she had no confidence that her voice would not crack when she'd talk to him.

"Miss..." Of course Nathan had recognized her as the Chairman of the ELEK Group but what bugged him was that why did he feel so familiar with her?

Thus he wanted to know and find out for himself to be at peace.

Eunji closed her eyes and remembered why she was doing this. She kept on remembering that with her eyes closed as she tried to calm herself down.

It somehow worked as she found an ounce of confidence and courage to speak.

"You must have been mistaken, Mister. I already apologized for bumping into you. Now, if you won't mind me leaving, I still have matters to attend to." Eunji heaved a deep sigh of relief and almost gave herself a tap on the shoulder for doing well.

"Have a good day Mister." She said as she walked away with a steady a stable pace.

Nathan furrowed as he followed her with his deep gaze.

Deep down, he hoped that he knew her.

But to his disappointment, she didn't sound like Eunji at all. Her lips and chin didn't looked like that of Eunji's.

And it frustrated him so much because he felt the same sense of familiarity that he only felt with Eunji around.

(A/N: You can fool the eyes but not the heart in love.)

No wonder...no wonder he felt that he should come here and attend this convention.

This was predestined to happen.

"Chairman of ELEK Group, I'll slowly remove your mask soon. So be prepared." He mumbled.

Meanwhile, Eunji's steady and stable steps staggered when she turned on the corner as she held on the wall for support.

"Chairman!" Her security escorts exclaimed in panic when they saw their Chairman was leaning on the wall for support.

Good thing no one was walking on this corridor or else they would surely witness this.

They themselves were shocked to witness this kind of reaction from their chairman whom they thought to have a heart as hard as an iron and as cold as liquid nitrogen when it comes to others but as soft and warm when it comes to her daughter.

Yes, they knew about Eunji's true identity as they were the top KSA agents.

However, none of them knew about her true relationship with Nathan.

Except from Eagle, those who knew of Eunji's relationship with Nathan was left in their branch in China and they were managed by Iris there.

Thus, the agents surrounding Eunji were those top agents who were unfamiliar to her past.

These two addressed Eunji as 'Chairman' and not 'Mistress' because they working with her in the corporate world. She hired them to protect her when she was in business and their job ended when she retreated in her apartment.

She prohibited them to interrupt with her private affairs after that. They had seen Eunji with Sophie bonding inside her office but that only ended there. That's why they knew that she could have a gentle side of her.

Going back, one of the female agent named Lee Yunha wanted to approach Eunji but she was stopped by his male counter part, Baek Dae-jung. They had been following the Chairman for quite some time now and he knew it was not the right time to approach her.

Perhaps, she might want to be left alone.

And he was right.

"Leave!" Eunji told his two escorts.

"Alright Chairman!" Though Lee Yunha and Baek Dae-jung said that, unless she got into her room and got dressed into her normal clothes, they won't stop following her.

"I'll be staying in my room. So you can go back or be with the others. Up to you. I'll notify Angelina when I'll appear again." Eunji added as she knew what was running in their minds at the moment.

But these two knew that they should guard her even if she had dismissed them earlier. It's better be safe than be sorry in the end.

Eunji didn't mind them as she walked like she was floating. Thankfully, she didn't bump into an acquaintance or else she didn't know how to explain why she was reacting like this.

As soon as she reached the door of her suite. She punched the code and swiped the key card immediately.

As soon as the door opened she immediately got inside and kicked the door behind her with a bang!

As soon as the door closed, she fell down on her knees and tears started streaming down her face.

She tossed the mask away and then sobbed silently.

Her heart was extremely broken at the moment.

Gosh! She missed him so much! She wanted to pounce and hug him earlier the moment she realized that it was actually him that she had bumped into.

She knew Nathan was having a hard time but not to the point where in his dark circles was very visible around his eyes.

Seems like he had been sleepless for a long time.

He seemed to also lose weight and had looked more matured.

She could tell that Nathan was in a miserable state!

And...that...that was because of her.

"Gosh! What have I done to him?" She blurted out.

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry..." Eunji repeated her apology over and over again even if she knew that no one was listening to her apology.

She hurt him so much even if she did somehow hurt her before she left.

His eyes... his eyes which was full of love and affection every time he looked at her in the past had lost the shine in them.

She bet that if he smiled, his smile was actually a smile of sadness.

"I'm sorry, Nathan. I'm sorry hubby."

Eunji somehow felt regret and guilt inside her. She regretted leaving Nathan...And she knew she had done something unforgivable.

It would be a miracle if he would still want her despite what she had done when everything's finally over.

Then she thought of her little boys.

How hard must it be for them to grow up knowing that their mother's dead.

"Oh my gosh! Will they be willing to recognize and accept me in their lives? Will I have a place in their lives?" Eunji could not help but ask herself.

What if it's already too late for her when she came back? What if there's nothing left for her?

What if Nathan would find an amazing woman to be his wife and her son would accept her as their new mother?

"No!" Eunji yelled.

She would never let that to happen.

Never!

She had to come up with a plan but to her frustration, her mind was not cooperating with her.

For the first time, she felt like the dumbest person on the whole planet Earth!

Her heart....it felt like being stabbed by a million dagger and she could feel it bleeding right in front of her.

***(Trigger warning start!!!)***

Eunji screamed in frustration as she could not stop this series of 'what ifs' running on her mind. She felt like she's going to be insane at the moment.

Her mind was in chaos and her heart was aching so much.

Then suddenly, her gaze darkened and she took the small knife that she hid on the black strap around her thigh and she looked at it.

Then the next second, she had done something that her mind had pushed her to do at the moment.

She...she cut her left wrist with it.

She could feel her flesh being cut by the sharp knife and then red blood oozed out from it.

Seeing her bleeding self with her own eyes, she somehow felt calmer as she started to feel the pain coming from the fresh cut she had just made.

She then laughed as she thought of how pathetic she had looked right now.

Gosh! She's going crazy.

***(End of Trigger Warning!!!)***

Eunji got up and went to the bathroom to wash the wound and disinfect it before it got infected.

She then opened the room's first aid-kit and she took a sterile gauze from it and placed it on top of her wound. She then applied pressure by pressing it for five to ten minutes to stop the bleeding.

She seemed to have hit an artery on her wrist as red blood soaked the gauze she had placed earlier.

She then added another much thicker layer of gauze and at the same time, elevated her wrist while pressing pressure on it.

Seems like the laceration she had made was quite deep. She thought that she might get some stitches to close it fully.

But first, she had to stop the bleeding. Seems like she had hit an artery as the bleeding didn't stop.

It's not her intention to end her life. She just wanted to deflect the heartbroken pain that she was feeling into another part of her body.

What she did was something irresponsible. What had possibly gotten into her mind earlier?

And now she's creating more trouble for herself.

Seeing her still bleeding wrist she could only sigh deeply.

Now she must stop the bleeding before she would lose a lot of blood.

She then walked towards her suitcase which was arranged below her bed and then opened one and took her pouch containing her silver needles. As soon as she had them, she then started doing acupuncture to slowly stop the bleeding in her wrist.

Within a minute, the bleeding finally stopped and Eunji took a cotton ball and soaked it with Betadine then used it to disinfect as he rubbed it around the surrounding area of the wound and the wound itself.

She didn't have any suturing needles with her thus she might have to go into the hospital to have it done there to close it.

She wrapped her wrist with her scarf and she changed into her casual outfit and she went into the nearest hospital to have it done there.

Eunji received a handful of lecture from the doctor and the latter was even sensible enough to refer her with a psychologist to help her cope up with what was bothering her rather than continue harming herself.

This was not the first time she had heard this advice so she's not ignorant about it.

She knew she's starting to have another relapse. No, she's experiencing a relapse...and...she should avoid the cause...or...of what triggered it in the first place.

She had to avoid Nathan.