The Sleeping Devil

Vol. 2 - Chapter 8 - Sin and Punishment

(Priest's POV)

"I don't have a name."

"Shortly before I was born, my father committed a crime and was imprisoned, while my mother died after giving birth to me."

"And because I had the protection of life, it seems I was taken in by the temple."

"When I was young, I didn't question anything. The other two people I lived with didn't have parents either, and I didn't even know the words "father" or "mother."

"I only knew that this is where it started, and that I had always been here."

"But the other two had names. That was the only thing that seemed a little strange."

During the baptism ceremony, one of the caretakers gave me a name on the spot, saying that the ceremony couldn't be performed without a name.

"...When I learned that it had a grotesque and hideous meaning, it was after already completing the baptism and starting to live with other worshippers."

"I knew nothing. I didn't know why I was being beaten, why I couldn't receive meals, why I was being cut, scorched, scolded, kicked, or submerged in water, or why I was given such a name."

"When I found out that the reason was because of my father, I also learned the reason why I was here."

"I had a reason to receive punishment. I inherited the sins of parents I didn't even know, whose faces I didn't know."

"Maybe not knowing until then was also a sin."

"Since then, every day, I have prayed earnestly to God. Please forgive me. Please forgive the sins of my parents and me."

"No matter how much my body hurt, I thought it was only natural to receive punishment. I would continue to receive punishment until my sins were forgiven. Even thinking about when I would be forgiven became a sin, I thought."

"There is a suitable task for you, so fulfill your duties properly."

On the day my first duty was assigned, I felt anxious for the first time. What if I accumulate more sins?

I hadn't become a priest yet, so if I were to fail in an important ritual for others, how could I atone for my sins?

The thought of piling up sins that belonged to no one but myself filled me with uneasiness.

The noble daughter with a name was incredibly beautiful. Even though she was still young, the same age as me when I received that name, she treated me kindly and with proper etiquette.

Her hair, sparkling in the sunlight, was beautiful and smooth like silk, while her blue eyes seemed to represent a pure and innocent heart. She was a pure and beautiful existence, the complete opposite of me. When I saw her, I became even more aware of my own impurity.

Yet, I committed another sin. Perhaps it was because my incantation became too quiet to be heard, or maybe my magic power was insufficient. No, it was impossible for a sinner like me to perform a ritual in the first place.

As an unforgiven person, how could I offer prayers to the gods...

When I realized it, I found myself lying on a luxurious bed, and I grew weary of how much I could accumulate sins. It wasn't a problem that could be solved by apologizing, yet foolishly, I begged for forgiveness. But the noble daughter had said to me, "It's not your fault," in her small, young voice.

The meal that was served afterwards consisted of lavish and delicious food that I had never seen or tasted before. It included honey, which the priest secretly licked at midnight... It was generously mixed into warm milk for me.

It was the first time I had such a warm meal.

When I was recommended to take a bath, I thought to myself, "So the time for punishment has come." The large tub, emitting steam, seemed to be filled with boiling water instead of regular water.

I strangely understood that even in the case of higher-ranking nobles, effort was put into their punishment. If I were boiled in here, would it be a small atonement for my sins?

"How is the temperature of the water, Your Excellency?"

I realized that my body wasn't stiff with pain, and I hurriedly looked over myself. There were no blisters or burns; instead, I was enveloped in a pleasant warmth. Even though I tried to think about what the punishment was, at that moment, I couldn't comprehend it.

My head was washed with fragrant soap, and I was given a drink that permeated my body. Where exactly is the punishment...

The luxurious guest room made me feel uncomfortable, but I hardly remember what happened after I got into the soft bed. I slept so deeply that I didn't even notice dinner time.

When I woke up to people's voices, I thought, "Oh no, if I overslept or something, I will be punished again..." When I raised my head upon hearing an unfamiliar voice, I saw Lord Hermes. I realized that this was a guest room in the Beriard family's mansion, and I remembered this morning's sin.

How much longer will I continue to commit sins? Failing the ritual, indulging in desires during meals, and dozing off in the daytime.

However, Lord Hermes didn't punish me. Instead, he talked to me for a little while and prepared dinner.

Even dining alone, it was another luxurious and warm meal.

There are even people taking care of me. I also felt afraid of what would come next.

Foolishly, I fell asleep again, and when I woke up next, I was confused.

The pure noble daughter, Lady Sheriel, was right in front of me.

And when I realized that it wasn't the temple, I understood the punishment that was bestowed upon me.

I see, understanding this warmth, that is the punishment. I'm already terrified of returning to that dark, mundane everyday life where nothing is clear.

Lady Sheriel succeeded in the ritual, and she kindly assured me that I was not the cause of the failure.

Could this adorable angel-like person actually be a devil?

This punishment is more terrifying than any I have experienced before. I felt like I was going mad.

I have to return immediately.

However, this charming devil-like girl has already contacted the temple and instructed me to stay for a few more days. If I didn't understand this punishment, would I have stayed as instructed?

If I return now, maybe everything will still be okay. It was the first time I rejected a punishment. It was that frightening.

If I had the chance to experience this warmth for just one or two more days, what would become of me when I returned to the temple?

Ah, it's frightening. What is Lady Sheriel thinking?

Due to the overwhelming fear, I spoke about the feelings in my heart.

Please, somehow, forgive me. Please, have mercy.

Lady Sheriel spoke a devilish sentence to me.

"Do you want to go back?"

I don't want to go back. When I understood that those were my own words, I realized it once again.

I truly don't want to go back. Even if thinking that I don't want to go back is a punishment in itself, I still can't help it. I don't want to return to that dark, cold temple.

How cruel can they be? Even though I have nowhere else to go besides the temple.

What a frightening devil she is. I heard from the caretaker earlier that the Beriard family is called the devil's household. I see, that's why I'm here.

"Then, shall we think of a way for you not to go back?"

What is going on? I, with my limited understanding, cannot comprehend. What kind of punishment is this? But it's not the twisted smile of the worshippers or the priests who torment me in the temple. It's a gentle, reassuring smile that someone weak-hearted like me would immediately cling to.

To say that I don't have to go back there, such sweet words... to have such expectations...

Ah, I don't understand anymore. Lady Sheriel, are you an angel or a devil?

I am a sinner. If possible, I want to receive punishment from this pure devil-like Lady.

I am foolish enough to cling to the fleeting hope of not having to go back.

I can't even imagine the hell that awaits if it doesn't come true.

After that, I confessed my sins. And I humbly begged for forgiveness.

"Lady Sheriel, yesterday I said that I didn't have a name. But, in truth, I have a name that is too hideous to speak out loud. I kept silent because I didn't want you to hear it. I apologize."

"I see. If you don't want to reveal it, it's okay."

Lady Sheriel often reassures me, saying "It's okay." I feel relieved by those words.

She accepts my feeble confession as if it were nothing.

Talking about my father, my mother, and my experiences in the temple to this young girl feels burdensome. It feels like I'm tarnishing her pure existence, like I'm doing something terrible.

However, Lady Sheriel accepts everything without changing her expression.

Perhaps she truly is an angel, not a devil.

Throughout the days of my continuous prayers to the gods, there was a part of me that resented them. That may be why my sins were not forgiven.

But now, I think that the person I should pray to is the girl in front of me.

"Lady Sheriel, how should I atone for my sins?"

"Sins? The priest has no sins, right? A parent is a parent, and a child is a child. If one were burdened with their parent's sins, the Beriard lineage wouldn't have lasted for three generations, don't you think?"

I thought Lady Sheriel's ability to say such things so easily might be a sign of my own insanity or lack of respect.

Then, why have I been like this all this time...

"Sheriel, let me handle that story," said Lord Hermes.

"Oh, yes. That's true. But, Priest, please refrain from punishing yourself."

I don't understand anymore. I've lost sight of who I used to be. But it feels like Lady Sheriel knows more about me than I do, and I feel like entrusting everything to her.

"Are you feeling tired? Have a meal and rest again."

"Yes... Thank you, Lady Sheriel."

I can have another meal. Is it really okay for me to still be here?

"Sheriel, go back first. I'll do some research before joining you."

"Yes, Grandpa. Then, please excuse me. Priest, take your time to rest, and if you get bored, let's go for a walk."

"Yes..."

A walk...? What does it mean to get bored?

After Lady Sheriel leaves the room, Hermes asks me two or three more questions.

"Do you cry and get confused like this normally?"

"N-No. I'm very sorry. This is not something that happens normally..."

"It's okay. Crying is not a bad thing."

After a brief conversation, Hermes places his hand on my abdomen.

"Hmm, that's strange."

What... Is he going to cut open my stomach and examine its contents?

As I think about such things, Hermes raises an eyebrow and smiles a little.

"Don't worry, I won't do anything painful. It might hurt your heart, but if you can endure it, you will be freed from your sins."

Hermes comforts me as if he can see through my thoughts.

Freed from my sins...? Could there be such a thing...

"Stay by Sheriel's side."

By Sherryell's side? Is he referring to the walk earlier? Am I allowed to accompany her, someone as clueless as I am?

Leaving me, a foolish and incomprehensible person, Hermes departs.

What will become of me?

However, in exchange for the pain in my chest, I felt a slight sense of relief in my mind.