The Twelve Apocalypses: A Damned Soul's Path to the Abyss

Chapter 61: A Helping Hand

Bronwynn offered me his hand, and I successfully took it in only two attempts. The first time, my arm twitched and shot up, but fell short. The second time, I managed a relatively firm grip, even if that was mostly down to my muscles seizing up and clamping around Bronwynn’s fingers.

I was glad he was a demon because I probably would have crushed his bones otherwise.

Getting pulled to my feet was an experience. I was trembling like a leaf, though I quickly discovered that cycling my mana through the strengthening technique actually did help. It sped up whatever process I was going through, making the new body I was inhabiting start to feel like my own.

And isn’t that a fun thought?

This wasn’t the body I had been shunted into when I joined the legion. Sure, it looked exactly the same, but the original ’Hayden Hall’ was now a pile of ashes on some crumbling piece of rock in the middle of space. That body, along with the entire world of Berlis, was gone. Probably for good.

So… I’m not a body-snatcher anymore?

Yay?

I was far from feeling secure in this new ’clone’ body, however. Even with the mana coursing through me, I still felt terrifyingly weak. At least I wasn’t the only one. All the recruits I could see around me were in as rough shape as I was, if not worse.

Looking at the other recruits broke my contemplative mood. The sight of them reminded me that I, too, was in the middle of some strange demonic city square, wearing nothing but my birthday suit.

I flushed scarlet again, but Bronwynn just huffed, rolled his eyes, and thrust a black piece of clothing into my chest. I hadn’t noticed it before, but he had a whole stack of garments thrown carelessly over his other hand.

The clothing turned out to be a robe, long and flowing and not at all comfortable. In fact, putting it on reintroduced the horrible scratching sensation I had experienced when I was inducted into the legion. I was briefly tempted to throw it off.

I didn’t, of course. My dignity, or what remained of it, was worth the discomfort.

"Why does everything feel so horrible here?" I grumbled.

"Because you’re in the circle of torment, kid. Did you expect it to feel like a thousand succubi caressing you or something?" snarked the demon, making me roll my eyes at the imagery. "You want shit like that, go to Ecstasy or Lust or what have you. Just know that most recruits who go there never make it back."

Shelving that little tidbit away, I dared another glance around me. Everywhere I looked, naked recruits lay on the ground. Some twitched. Others moaned. A small group of demons were making their way through the ranks, carelessly throwing robes over the prone mortals.

I was trying to decide which vital question to ask Bronwynn next when my restless eyes finally landed on a familiar figure.

I tried to lunge forward and almost took a tumble. Would have, if Bronwynn hadn’t gripped the back of my horribly uncomfortable robe with a sigh.

"What is it now?"

"Mia. That’s Mia," I whispered, eyes wide with a desperate sort of hope. I had been so out of it at first, and then resolute in ignoring the pain that stabbed through my chest at the thought of her, but I realized I was an idiot. If I was there, and so many others were there, then of course she was there as well. Wouldn’t make sense if we all got resurrected and she was left to rot as a snack in the void…

That last idea did all sorts of weird things to my brain. My feelings were caught up in such an unforgiving duality about that experience that my mind glitched, like my body needed another full post-resurrection reset.

I shook my head.

Important stuff now. Existential panic and dread later.

An amused Bronwynn let me tug him along, making no fuss as I snatched a robe away from him and laid it gently over the twitching cat lady.

Her eyes were still closed, moving wildly behind her eyelids. I wasn’t sure whether I should wake her up or not. Thankfully, with my smarts somewhat recovered, I had enough presence of mind to turn to Bronwynn for advice.

"Can I help her somehow? Is it safe to wake her up?"

He scoffed, but the sound was somehow friendly rather than derisive. "Yes, you can. What you experienced… it stopped before your body formed. Not sure how your brain interpreted it all, since it can be difficult for mortal minds to go through something like that, but your friend’s fully there in her flesh."

I ignored the emphasis he gave the word ’friend,’ along with the teasing lilt on the word ’flesh.’ I was a ton of things, probably a war criminal at that point, but I wasn’t about to ogle a woman having a weird seizure while her soul and body re-synced.

Still, with that question answered, I couldn’t hold back a flare of anger.

"Yeah, about that. What in the world happened? He… he killed us. Executed us." I shuddered. The memory of fingers slipping effortlessly through my face would definitely feature in my future nightmares. "How are we still alive? Or… alive again? We’re not demons."

Bronwynn sighed. He bought some time for himself by throwing robes over the surrounding recruits. Even with all that was happening, without and within, I couldn’t help noticing the bored, detached manner with which he regarded their bodies.

"Although the legion accepts a large number of mortals with each recruitment intake, not all of them are born with what it takes to be a soldier. Even with training, plenty of them panic, refuse to kill, or just let themselves die. Sometimes for moral reasons, sometimes out of spite."

The demon shrugged as he turned to look at me, his face carefully blank. I stayed silent and waited for him to get on with it.

"So, there are… tests, rankings, and evaluations. Every recruit that makes it to the end of their first invasion receives a merit, as you might know. As a guarantee of their ability, it’s a sign that the legion should take them more seriously than the other recruits, and allocate appropriate training and resources for their advancement."

"And the dying? The execution?" I pressed bitterly, though I already had a sense of where this was going.

"It sounds like the process wasn’t handled properly." Bronwynn winced, the first sign of his mask cracking. "But it was necessary, since it links your soul fully to the Abyss. It is strongly discouraged to share this fact with recruits, Hayden, but here it is. You belong to the Abyss. That was true ever since your induction. Whenever you die, you don’t get to have a peaceful trip to the afterlife. You will continue to come back, like we do, until you fail to pay your resurrection toll, or you’re slain here. Then, well… you’ll nourish the Abyss in a different way."

I shuddered, well and truly, from the top of my head to the bottom of my soles. I didn’t need my imagination to know what ’nourishing the Abyss’ meant.

But I had no idea what to think about the rest of it. Why hadn’t the legion told us that we would now resurrect, like demons? That seemed like a pretty important detail to omit.

Then again, I guess it made sense. How would mortal recruits act, if they knew death was now just an inconvenience? A financial inconvenience, if I understood Bronwynn right, but a mere inconvenience nonetheless. Would they fight as ferociously? Would they sink to the same lows?

Would I have?

A part of me wanted to say that no, I wouldn’t have been so desperate and set on murder. Another part of me laughed and called me a liar.

I told both of them to shut up, and refocused on the present.

"But then why…" I trailed off, unsure of whether I wanted to voice my suspicions.

"Why what?"

I looked at Bronwynn, at his regretful and sincere expression, and didn’t know what to say. I wanted to ask why Mercutio had been so determined to kill me before the end of the invasion, when he knew I would just come back anyway. But how could I casually form a question about that? Glaustro’s letter had made it clear that Mercutio was a powerful demon. The wrong words, even to Bronwynn, could be dangerous.

Thankfully, I was spared the need to respond when I heard Mia moan in pain. I knelt next to her immediately, my hand pausing halfway to her face. Then her eyes fluttered open and landed on mine, and I forgot my hesitation.

"Mia? Hey, you’re alright. We’re both alright," I whispered gently, unable to resist the urge to boop her nose before slowly helping her into a sitting position. Her face scrunched up in a rather adorable manner.

"Wuh-wat happened?" she managed to stutter.

She didn’t help me with the maneuvering, but she wasn’t fighting me, either. Honestly, she was regaining lucidity faster than I had. And though her body was twitching all over, she was still able to hold on to the robe, keeping it in place.

"We’re back in the Abyss," I said calmly. Her eyes squinted at me in a way that meant she was displeased, and I rushed to clarify. "Apparently, we resurrect the way demons do now. Although, uh… you may want to get dressed?"

She tilted her head, blinking at me. Then her eyes drifted over our surroundings. A blush fought its way across her cheeks and down her neck as she squeaked in indignation.

I rushed to my feet and turned away, ignoring the sounds of cloth shuffling behind me. Bronwynn was watching us both with a smug smirk that made me want to… well, not punch him, but maybe be mean.

That was, of course, precluded by him being a demon who could vaporize me, for real this time. And, you know, the fact that I still carried a ton of guilt over his death in Berlis.

The memory finally made the words leave my mouth.

"I’m so sorry, Bronwynn."

I was whispering, but he still heard and shot me a confused look.

"I didn’t catch on fast enough," I explained. "I warned Glaustro about the trap, but by that time… and you were trying to help me, and I…"

He looked startled, but then he sighed, giving me an odd look I couldn’t decipher. "Hayden, it’s not your fault. We didn’t notice. None of us did. And we should have, because from what I heard, that enchantment was still leaking mana, no matter how minute. We just thought spatial mana was lingering in the area because of the barrier, and we paid for it. Do you understand?"

His eyes were intense. Intense enough to make me nod, however reluctantly. "Sure."

Though he clearly didn’t believe me, he just shook his head. "And that reminds me, how are you managing your ascension? You didn’t put more souls into it, did you? Because that would be stupid."

"No, no, I didn’t, all my souls are right… here…" I trailed off, reaching for the purse that was always attached to my waist.

There was nothing there.

No purse. No sword. No grimoire or stolen dimensional bag.

I spun on the spot, unable to fight off the rising panic, trying to remember where I had woken up from before rushing over to Mia.

"Hayden? Hayden!" Bronwynn snapped, grabbing my shoulders. "Relax. Is this about your weapon and purse? They’re soul-bound, you idiot. Just focus on them, imagine them, will them to your side."

I didn’t understand what he wanted from me. I tried anyway, but my thoughts were buzzing, scattered, frantic. The panic only grew when my attempt failed. It was only when he gave my shoulders a rough shake that I thought seriously about his instructions.

I focused on my items. I tried to feel the bonds I knew I had with them. Slowly, I calmed down enough to imagine each item in detail.

That was when something snapped into place.

I was always aware of the items on some level. They were a presence at my side, as reassuring as a background noise. Now, I felt every facet of each unique link, and I called out through them.

Unfortunately, I yoinked on all the links at once.

Four items materialized in front of me out of thin air, and I had barely a second to catch them before they started to fall. I chose to go for the sword and the book. It was a good thing the sword came with its own sheath, because I absolutely would have cut myself up as I hugged both items to my chest. My purse and bag fell to the ground, limp but unharmed.

I let out a long sigh of relief.

"That’s neat." Mia’s voice was right beside me, and I turned to look at the fully clothed cat lady. "Now, tell me how to do it myself because my purse is missing."

I blinked. I thought I had simply left my stuff on the ground where I woke up. If that wasn’t the case, then where was it all before I called to it?

Still pondering, I bent down to pick up my purse.

I froze.

A shot of worry and frustration coursed through me. The purse was far lighter than it was supposed to be.

Shuffling my sword and grimoire into one arm, I managed to push my hand into my purse, feeling out the pitiful number of souls inside. My feelings must have shown on my face because both Mia and Bronwynn looked worried about me.

I stared at the demon, about ready to cry.

"Where did most of my souls go?"