The Werewolf King's Bride

Chapter 210: Can't Let It Go

(From Blue's Perspective)

Our tonight's date was canceled. Dem said it was good for me to stay in my room and rest. I insisted, but he did not listen just like always.

I started to review some documents in the meantime. Dem had gone out for a while, perhaps to meet Luc. He said something, but Sapphire was meowing too much so I could not focus.

"Your Highness, shouldn't you take some rest?" Ruby said. "You have been working for three hours now."

"Dem works six to seven hours at a stretch. And I only worked for three hours," I said.

"His Highness has got accustomed to it. But Your Highness should take things slow," she pointed out.

"Ruby, go out and play."

"Your Highness is not listening to me."

"Why don't you stop bothering me and think about what you are gonna say to Luc? You have to give him an answer, right? You can't make him wait too much. It's not okay for him," I said.

"That's true..."

"Then go out and think about it in your room."

"Your Highness has to promise me not to push yourself," she urged.

"Ha, alright," I sighed. "I promise. Now go."

Ruby left after nagging a bit more. She was more like a friend at this point. I sometimes wished she could call me by my name like a friend. But I could not give her that right, even if I wanted to. It was because there was a boundary that a Queen could not cross.

I was glad that at least Luc could call me by my name. He even called Demetrius by his name. It was perhaps not just because he was our friend; rather he was in the same position as us. We were the king and the queen, while he was the master of the magic tower. They were equal.

Sapphire was on my chest, plaything with her paw. She was surprisingly feeling a lot better after I fed her the medicine and some water in the afternoon. If her recovery was this quick, then I would not have to worry anymore.

"You also like to rub your face against my chest, huh?" I muttered, stroking her furs. "You know, your daddy likes it too. I don't know why, but he says that it calms him down. Is it the same for you?"

"Would my child also like it if it was born?"

'Haa, again! Why? Why can't I just let it go? Every single time, I remember that face from my dream... and my whole body stops... I can't breathe...

I feel guilty! Dem told me it's not my fault and I should not feel guilty, but I can't help it. If only I was a bit more careful...'

"My heart hurts... You know, Sapphire, this time I truly wish that if only I could turn back time, I would definitely save my child. I did not want to be a mother this quickly, but I hated losing my little baby. I just... sound so crazy, huh?"

"Let's stop thinking about these things. My baby will feel bad if I am sad, so... It's hard to be happy these days, but I will try."

Sapphire meowed and pressed her paw on my face. Sometimes, I had the feeling that she understood every single word I was saying.

"Are you comforting me, little Sapphy? That's so sweet of you...," I smiled, stroking behind her ear.

Now that I thought about it, Sapphire never actually scratched me, not even once. It was kind of impossible to even think about because every cat owner was scratched or bitten at least once by their cat.

Sapphire was a very calm cat. At least, that was how she was with me. But she had scratched Ruby whenever she was mad and bit Perita a lot of times. She even scratched Luc when he tried to hold her once. He never tried to touch her again. She also scratched Dem once, but that scratch was very little compared to what she did to others.

Dem wanted to throw her out of the window, but he stopped because of me.

But strangely, all these things happened when I was not near. I had never seen her biting or scratching anyone. She was kind of well behaved in front of me.

"Sapphire, even though no one complains other than Demetrius and Luc, you still have to behave. You bit Doctor Dimitri and Perita. Then you scratched Ruby and Luc. You also scratched Demetrius a bit when he tried to get you off his chest. Just because you are cute, you can't get away with everything. What will others say if you keep misbehaving?

That the Queen's cat is always misbehaving? How will I feel then? You have to behave yourself and if you don't, I won't let you in my room anymore, okay?"

Sapphire nudged against my chest again. I did not know if she understood me or not. She was just a cat after all. But treating her like a child had been a regular thing for me.

It was like I was looking for someone in her.

"I wonder when Dem will come back. I wish he isn't doing anything crazy again," I muttered to myself.

He was cruel and merciless. To him, killing was the same as cleaning. I heard these kinds of things so much that they did not feel strange anymore even though it was scary. I wished he did not behave like that and tried to be a bit normal. But these days, I started to understand that asking him to be normal was like asking a lion to pet a calf.

Although he was very rude to others and did not care about anyone, he was not like that with me. He rarely got angry at me and yelled at me. But when he was angry, it was frightening. It was like my whole body would freeze up. And when he yelled, it was even scarier.

But I loved him. It was stupid of me to fall for someone like him who was like a walking red flag. It was not like I could help it. I tried not to because I did not want to get hurt. But in the end, I fell into the trap that I wanted to avoid so much.

I tried to focus on the documents again. The number of fields that I took care of increased. It was going to increase more and more. If I said it was not tiring, it would be a huge lie. Dem said that if I did not want to, I did not have to do anything. But in that case, he would have to do everything.

He did not mention it, but it was obvious. I did not want him to work only. So, I decided to take care of as many things as I could.

I needed an office now as well. Dem offered me to use his office temporarily, but I refused. I was sure that I would not be able to work even just a bit if I was in the same room with him.

My office was going to be the room in the opposite direction of Dem's office. It was a bit far, but that room was the best one. It was just as huge as Dem's office. Dem even hired a designer to decorate my office as well. It was supposed to be done within this week.

"Ugh, my back hurts," I grumbled, stretching. "It must be because I have been sitting like this for four hours now."

Sapphire liked to stay with me, unlike other cats that did not like to snuggle with a person for too long. She liked to lie on my chest or rub her face against me. I did not find it annoying. It was a warm and comforting feeling.

I stood up, placing the papers carefully on the bed while taking Sapphire in my arms. I placed her on my shoulder and stretched my back. My whole body was kind of sore. It was not just because I was sitting for too long, but also because of what I did with Dem in his study.

I paced around the room a bit and then went to the balcony. The cold air felt very fresh and calming.

"You like the sky too, don't you? That's why you like it when the window is open just like me," I said, rubbing my face against Sapphire who was on my right shoulder.

The sky was clear. The bluish-black color of the night sky looked as beautiful as always. I liked this color a lot. It was oddly satisfying.

How long had it been that no one raised their hand on me? It had been perhaps a bit more than four months. After that night when I was rescued and tied down at the same time, everything had been different.