The Years of Apocalypse - A Time Loop Progression Fantasy

Chapter 13 - Small Changes

Mirian had a plan for finding out where to send the letters. She would visit Bainrose Castle and get the librarians to help her. However, there was a problem: She'd seen the librarian who had chatted with that guard tomorrow (that felt weird to think about that way) was the same one working the library today. A different librarian was working over the weekend, so she could visit the Bainrose library Sixthday.

Tonight, she resolved to study for Alchemistry. It was exhausting work. She wondered if Nicolus was studying with his knight in the library, or they just used their apartments in the city for that. A pang of envy went through her. The Sacristar family had relatives and estates nearby. Her family was three train rides away, practically on the other side of Baracuel. Once a year, she made her trip back to Arriroba so she could visit during the summer festival. The journey took about a week, so it was hard to visit more often without missing classes. Three days of riding trains, then two days to walk to the town. How lucky others were to be able to see their family. She missed her parents, and she missed her little brother.

At least they'd be safe, she knew. If she failed.

And what would happen if she did fail? The Gods must have given her a second chance. She doubted they would give her a third.

Clear your mind. Focus.

She could feel the tension rising in her, and it would do no good. When she'd been a child, and felt anger and fear so quickly, her parents had taught her how to meditate. She did this now, breathing in and out. She visualized the rolling arid hills of her home, thought of the distant warm breezes that came from the south. With her mind clear, she went back to studying for Alchemistry.

When she slept, her dreams were strange again. She walked across a great stone causeway, the floor black and white speckled marble. There were no walls or ceilings. Instead, the endless stars were splayed out, only it seemed there were too many. Far more than were in the night sky. Here and there, strange rainbow clouds drifted amidst those stars. A silence followed her, and with it, the feeling that she was being watched. But when she looked, she could see nothing.

Then, there was a fire in the heavens. She could describe it no other way; all at once, thousands of stars blazed out, surrounded by a cascading storm of light. The great fire pulsed like a heartbeat. She could feel that thump vibrating through the stone she stood on. With each of its drumbeats, the burning storm leapt outward to a new group of stars, and they were consumed. It came closer, glowed brighter.

On impulse, she looked behind her. One of the stars beckoned to her, called to her. When she looked at it, she thought: Home. Not in any words, but in feeling. The vast skies of Arriroba, with the thin drifting clouds so up high. The door of her family's apartment, weathered but sturdy. The embrace of her mother and father after coming home from school. Watching her brother, still an infant, smiling in his crib. And that star—why did it feel so familiar?

Behind her, the consuming fire grew.

The nails falling from the alarm candle roused her with a start. She wanted to go back to sleep and find out what had happened with the storm in the stars, but there was no hope of that. Instead, she sighed and got up. From the other bed, Lily gave a groan. "I can't get up, it's too warm," she said sleepily. Then, "Do we really have to do more exams? I already did two, that should be plenty."

"At least it's Fifthday," Mirian said.

Mirian spotted Xipuatl in the Alchemistry exam. Somehow, she'd never noticed him in class before. She wondered what brought him into the study sessions with Nicolus. She hadn't seen them talk either. The exam was easier the second time, now that she'd refreshed herself on the material she knew was present. Again, she felt guilty, like she was cheating, but what was she supposed to do? Pretend it hadn't all happened?

When she went to Myrvite Ecology, she realized something had changed. Professor Viridian had chosen a different magical organism, though she couldn't tell what it was. He had it in a glass pot, but all she could see were white roots. "Moon-root," he said, gesturing at the container. Viridian looked and sounded tired, though he was trying to hide it. "It's not actually a plant, but a mushroom, though you'll only see it sprout at night under a bright moon. However, the mycelium are quite active. Like most fungus, it's a decomposer. Moon-root, however, seems to need very little magic from what it consumes. Somehow, it is able to draw mana from other sources. It produces luax, sometimes called moon-tears, 3-A. However, though the mana in the tiny gray crystals it creates is A-class, the mushroom itself is toxic to humans. Baduka boars, however, can't get enough of the stuff." The lecture that followed was not the one she remembered. It focused a lot more on decomposition and death in the ecosystem.

Mirian wondered what had changed. Had the break-in to the building been stopped? Or had the spies just escaped and tried again?

If the other students' presentation in Artifice had been boring the first time, they were even worse the second time. Mirian stopped paying attention after the first presentation, and started sketching her designs for her spellrod. This time, she wanted to put at least one combat spell on it, not just utility spells. Not that she had any hope of fighting off dozens of trained soldiers with rifles and wands. She couldn't stop thinking about what she'd seen. Again, she found her heart racing. She slowed her breathing and imagined a desert, vast and calm. In her mind, it was where the warm wind she liked so much blew from, and in that wind was peace.

When she had done that, she started listening to the presentations again, and had to suppress a groan. The end of the class couldn't come soon enough.

Mathematics went by fast enough, and the repetition was helpful. Then she went back to her dorm to meet Lily. "Duels?" Lily asked her.

"Duels," she said, and what a relief. "You want to come?"

Again, Lily looked at the stacks of papers on her desk and said, "Yeah, hell, why not."

So off they were to the Stygalta Arena. As they passed by the Torrian Tower, Mirian remembered watching it fall. Gods, how was she supposed to just keep going with normal life after what she'd seen? But she reminded herself that here, she could maybe convince Lily she wasn't crazy, and soon, she could send off those letters.

Again, Mirian made her way to to the quicksilver room. She spotted Platus, and remembered abruptly that he had died before the attack. What was the connection?

She also saw Liamar and Valen. Selesia wasn't here yet. She joins later, right? Mirian had a good memory, but there were so many things to remember, and she hadn't paid all that much attention to most of them. That was one problem with proving anything. The other was that stuff changed. Or there could be another explanation. Like, she could reveal she knew all the exam questions, but long before 'time travel,' most people would say 'she saw a copy of the exam early.'

Weather might be good. But then she couldn't remember which day it actually started snowing. Well, dueling would do her good. It would at least clear her head of all the nonsense thoughts in it.

After practice, she was ready to fight Valen, ready for that stupid feint attack she was going to try to pull, but then she saw the names on the board. This time she was fighter number three, and Valen was eight.

It had changed.

Damn it all, she thought. What had changed it? It hadn't even been two days, but somehow, the small changes had added up and the judge had pulled the number cards slightly differently. Was it her entry time? Was it how she'd talked to Lily, so that she did something differently? Or was it a causal chain she hadn't even realized she was starting? Well, now she knew; she couldn't rely on small detailed events. Predicting dice rolls and coin flips was out of the question.

Ironically, it was Platus she was fighting. The boy was a brute, and his rapier technique was garbage. When he parried, he tried to use those big muscles for it, and just ended up opening himself up to a quick disengage. By all rights, he shouldn't have been in the quicksilver room. Maybe the cobalt room would have been a better fit, but his ego apparently couldn't handle that. Mirian used quick footwork and slow feints to bait him, then quickly got around his guard. The bout was over quickly, a resounding 5-0 victory for Mirian.

She bowed respectfully, thinking, you die soon, unless I can stop it. How strange it was, to know that. But what could she say? She didn't think telling him would do anything. At least, not until she knew more. Gods, she'd thought dueling might clear her head, but it was just making her think about it more.

Mirian joined Lily on the benches. "Does Platus always accuse you of cheating?" Lily asked.

"Huh? Oh, not just me. Basically everyone. Did he do it again?"

"Yeah, as he walked by. Wow. What a great guy, huh?"

"He certainly has a reputation," Mirian said. She wracked her mind, trying to think about what they talked about last time. "So what classes are you taking next quarter?"

"Alchemistry," Lily said with a groan.

"I can totally give you my notes for that," Mirian said. "What else?"

"Advanced Spell Empowerment. If I can get in, of course. There's some strict entry requirements."

That seemed vaguely familiar. Mirian retraced the conversation as best she could, then went to her second bout. This time, it was against Liamar.

Oh shit, she thought. She hoped that the meeting with Selesia wasn't contingent on winning this bout, because she was about to get her ass unavoidably kicked.

Liamar started with an explosive attack, sending Mirian wheeling back with several desperate parries. When she tried to maneuver to the side and counter-attack, she found his blade was already at her side. After that, it only went downhill. Mirian was able to get two glancing blows on him, but Liamar ended the bout shortly after. Well, there was no shame losing to the best.

When she sat back down, she was pleased to see that Selesia and Lily had finally met.

"Do you usually get trounced like that?" Lily asked.

"If it's Liamar? Absolutely. He's probably the best swordsman in Baracuel. I'm just happy I almost got a full point on him. Who's this?"

"Oh, this is Selesia. She was admiring your form."

Selesia blushed, as she had before. "That is not what I said."

They talked amicably for awhile, Mirian explaining the nuances of the bouts they were watching, and Selesia talking about history. Selesia joined them at the dining hall again. This time, Mirian did pick up on a few things. Selesia kept looking at her when she thought Mirian wasn't looking. She also was interested in whatever Mirian had to say. Part of her wanted to acknowledge that, but she couldn't. She didn't want to change the outcome.

When they headed back to the dorm, Mirian said, "She was nice."

And Lily replied, "I think she likes you."

This time, Mirian said, "Open the note."

Lily got very quiet. When they entered the dorm, she went over to her desk where she rummaged around in the back drawer. She cracked the wax seal, then read. Mirian could tell she was uncomfortable. "What is this?" she finally asked. "Did you recruit some… some fourth year to… what? Prank me? Is this your way of… what are you trying to do?" Her words came out with far more pain and venom than Mirian expected. She took a step back.

"I'm trying to get you to believe me," she whispered. A single tear escaped her eye, but she quickly wiped it away.

"I need… I need some time to think," Lily said, and abruptly, she left, leaving Mirian alone.

Mirian put her hands in her head. There had to be some way to get people to believe her, before it was too late. If she couldn't even convince her best friend, who could she convince?