Casual Heroing

Chapter 184: Trial by Lightning

What Appius had been casting while I thought he was focused on the duel is akin to a greenhouse – if greenhouses were deadly traps where it rained lightning continuously. My enemy [Flies] away from me with a jump in the air.

Dark clouds keep accumulating into a dome-like shape, enclosing both of us. The energy snakes in and out of the energy clouds, thick with ozone and death. Yep, this thing feels like death on my skin.

“You want to see real magic? This is a [Dome of Lightning]! My capstone ability! This is what will put me in the ranks of [Archmages]! And now, worm, you will be crushed like your race during the Extermination War!” he cackles maniacally while I just keep looking.

Is this the person Laura was supposed to marry? Who even thought such a thing possible? A beautiful, flower-like her with an idiot that’s also ugly? I mean, I might not be Brad Pitt myself, but I could have held Rose on Titanic’s deck any day of the week compared to this guy.

“The Trees of Life are extinct, but the might of Elves still lives! Immortality shall one day be reclaimed by our kind, even if the whole world has to suffer for it! The usurpers will die, and the whole—”

Holy shit, is this some villain monologue full of hints for future adventures? Better not to listen to this idiocy before I get roped into even more dangerous plots. Also, I should take my distance from Elves and Vanedenis alike.

His hands are raised like a maestro who’s going to conduct an orchestra.

I take a look around the stands because I need to see the expressions on my friends’ faces. And not just my friends.

My eyes go to Laura first.

She’s a bit cold but also worried. She’s the most beautiful woman in the world, but I think I caused a major blunder over there. I think that ‘love’ might be out of my reach at the moment. I don’t see how I could, in any feasible way, have a relationship with her. I don’t know if it’s the anger – and don’t be fooled by my calm tone. Everyone lets it out in different ways – but I feel like something broke in me. Maybe I’m suffering from a psychotic attack; who knows. But one thing is sure – I have been focusing on the Princess too much. Also, I probably shouldn’t have made such a promise to her. Meh, I guess I’ll still try for some peace between the Continents. But marrying her?

She didn’t throw herself in harm’s way.

That’s the thing that got me. She didn’t come here. And I don’t care if she maybe thought I could take care of it myself. Hell, she could have even name-dropped the crown, bugged Stan more. But she just watched. In the end, in the tragedy that is my life, she’s just a spectator, not the heroine. Maybe, she could be the damsel in distress, but that’s not how I roll. Other than big buns, I also fancy myself a strong woman.

I start summoning the magic I had been holding off as I keep looking at the stands. Soon, Appius’s spell will materialize. There’s no reason I should be getting any closer to him. I bet that he has some [Lightning Immunity] thingy, anyway.

Now, Stanimal.

Stanimal—that’s the person I’ve considered my guardian so far, almost a father figure. No, you know what? A father figure without the ‘almost.’ But in the end, he just watched. He did not jump. That… hurts. Would I have jumped? Hell yeah. Hero-style. That’s what you do. If you want to lose your life, better do it in the proper context. Not while slipping on a bathroom tile.

Domitilla was paralyzed by fear, and that’s ok. The poor girl didn’t know what she was getting into when she came here. I’m not even sure that taking her in as a [Student] – or was it [Disciple] – was the right move. But at least I’m teaching her something useful. I hope she will return to Amorium and become a boring [Accountant] or something like that. I really think that’s the best choice for her. She needs friends, a slightly boring life, and a family. Not me. Not this mess.

I feel like this whole narrative is shifting to a big fucking goodbye. I mean, I did leave Camilla and Clodia in charge of my bakery together with Quintus and Tiberius. I guess they don’t really need me to run the place. Plus, the two veterans already have enough recipes for a lifetime of success and levels.

Now, Lucillus looks really troubled by all that’s happening. And I’m pretty sure he was tempted to just run into the arena at some point. I guess that in the end, my grunting friend was the most loyal of the bunch.

And as soon as I finish that thought, a raging rain made of blue lightnings starts peppering the ground of the arena, instantly turning the dirt and sand into glass. The lightnings are so powerful that the entire arena shakes, and the massively tall and thick columns are on the verge of breaking. A cloud of dust so big that it could pass as a sandstorm bursts into the air as if running away from all that destruction.

Appius laughs maniacally, like the two-cent villain he is. He’s satisfied with the slaughter. He thinks that even if I could somehow survive the first blow thanks to my shields, I’ll never survive long enough to make it through the entire skill. And yes, this is more of a skill – or ability, whatever nomenclature you prefer – than a proper spell. The difference is in your understanding of the thing. It took me casting a proper gamma knife to get the blue thing. And this spell I’m currently casting is the same. I’m no lame, nerdy Elf, kiddo.

So, while Appius’s spell rains death and destruction, everyone probably thinks I’m dead because you can’t see shit in this mess… it’s very much like those lame films that rely on climaxes and effects like that. What’s it called when they reveal that the person appearing from the smoke is actually alive?

Sometimes I wish I was a writer. I would definitely know more words, wouldn’t I?

But the die is cast—nah, that’s not how I want to say it.

The… whatever.

Listen, I have this spell that made me survive. Boo-hoo. Big surprise. So, to make it easier to picture: there is a lot of red light filtrating through the smoke that is finally coming down. Appius’s spell has finally run its course. My Mana was kind of running out. That’s why I’m chugging Mana potions like water after a big pizza with lots of prosciutto crudo. I’m also smoking a bit. Not a cigarette. My glittery shorts are smoking. I got partially hit by that deadly rain of [Lightning].

Bottom line, this is a shield. And it’s a shield made in the greatest, most perfect, most genius…

A realization hits me.

I could have made this stupid, fucking red rose in the form of a pair of ass cheeks.

Goddammit.josei