Casual Heroing

Chapter 252: [Archmage] Alonna

“Nice spells,” I say to start the conversation.

“I used to consider myself an odd spellcaster before coming to your class,” she says with a straight face. “Boobs? [Archmages] of old are probably trying to climb out of their tombs to bury you along with them. But then, it’s also true that you have an [Archmage] of old by your side. A Vanedeni [Princess] that sent the world in disarray and then simply went back into hiding.”

“Valarith is worried about some higher magic,” I shrug, “she’s a bit crazy, you know.”

“It’s rare to find someone who speaks like that about their master.”

“Master? What? Valarith is not my master,” I say with a little too much passion.

“Oh,” Alonna smiles, content with having pried more info out of me.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. My master is stronger than Valarith. Well, was, at least.”

“Another Vanedeni,” Alonna says, “but that’s not why I came here. I had people keeping an eye on you, and they told me the [Princess] had come to create problems for you. So, you have no intention of going forward with the engagement.”

“Still fishing? Yeah, who cares. No engagement. No marriage. No Elven crown. Is that a problem?”

“A problem? It’s a smart decision. The court is no place for anyone with a brain, Joey Luciani. I’m just not interested in meddling with their affairs more than I have to. And since our common friend told me you need someone to spar with, I wanted to work out a favorable arrangement for us both.”

“Sure thing,” I smile.

“Many decide not to meddle with the underworld, cutie,” she says, going slightly off-topic and shooting a wink at me. “It’s rare to find practical mages.”

Cutie?

Oh, right. This woman called me a cutie during the meeting presided by Ariostus as well. Right!

“Well, thanks. But what do you want in return for having sparring sessions with me?”

“Friendship,” she smiles. “You officially started learning magic around a year ago. If that is true, then you must be a prodigy like we have rarely seen them. Magic has behaved differently for the past few years, Luciani.”

She says the second part with a more solemn tone, and her eyes shift from playful to serious.

“Change is in the air. And when an era ends and a new one begins, people in my position die like flies. I’ll not be committed to arrogance like Titus. And even he was present at your lessons. You are not yet strong as a proper [Mage] would be, but you have terrifying weapons at hand. That rose, in particular…”

“And I still have to finish working on that spell, you know? Been busy with other stuff.”

“You should still be practicing Cantrips,” Alonna laughs, “and, instead, here you are teaching them to [Archmages]. Your advanced knowledge is only part of the reason you are strong, youngster.”

“All right. I’ll be your friend, but what will you teach me?”

“Magic, fighting, love… everything, really. You have such a distinct personality. You’re very talented, cutie.”

Is she hitting on me?

“But as far as magic goes, I’m sure Valarith and your mysterious master have you covered. But fighting? I have been on Kome, and I met Lady Goldith. She and I have mutual respect. I was there last year, actually. She was planning for—” suddenly, Alonna stops speaking.

“I’d love to chat more, but I have other matters to attend to. I’ll have someone deliver a message.”

“Why don’t people use [Message] spells instead?”

“Too easy to snatch out of air. If you want to make them your thesis to become an official [Archmage] of the academy, though, that’d be welcome, cutie.”

…

“That was weird,” I tell Princess Bianca while going inside my place.

As soon as I enter, I see everyone splattered all over the place. Anneus is sleeping on the couch with his face buried in a soft pillow, prone. Marcellus is yawning theatrically while still stuffing his mouth with more food from my pantry.

Amelia is on the other couch, sleeping peacefully.

“Right, she probably took Alba upstairs,” I tell myself. I didn’t buy a second bed yet, and that might have been a mistake.

I reach Marcellus, making a mental note to myself to arrange for a second and maybe a third bedroom for the upstairs. There’s no space yet. But who said I couldn’t expand, right? People here have skills and levels; how hard could it be?

“Marcy, still eating? Aren’t you full?”

“Never,” he yawns. “Was everything resolved peacefully?”

“I guess. Alonna vouched for me. Cool stuff. I’m not sure if she’s trying to hit on me or not.”

“Why are they all sleeping up here?” I ask him right after.

“I don’t know,” Marcellus yawns again.

Anneus, on the other hand, sits up and stares at us.

“Can’t you be quiet?” he says a second before diving back into the pillow.

“We need another couch,” I say.

“Or two,” Marcellus notes, slightly more awake.

“We’ll have room for all of us there.”

I start to make the adjustments in my head to figure out what my living room would look like, maybe moving the coffee table in front of Anneus’s couch to another spot.

“Well, I have some cots in my bag of holding; wait.”

…

After I wake up the following day, I find Alba downstairs, talking to Princess Bianca and Amelia.

“Yo,” I greet them. “What’s going on?”

“We were discussing what happened last night,” Alba says. “Amelia and I are going to stay together. Amelia has to move out of the house.”

“What?”

“I’m waiting for my husband’s pension and can’t reach my sons at the moment,” she says with a smile, “Alba said she has room at her place and that she wouldn’t mind some company.”

“Is Princess Bianca coming as well?” I say, pointing at the Wallorian Treasurer.

“Oh, no, she just wanted to listen,” Alba says respectfully. She’s clearly afraid of the little white pig.

“Don’t let her bully you, Alba,” I snort, “she’s a bit haughty.”

My Wallorian Treasurer shoots a look at me. A mean look.

“Be nice,” I tell her.

“She’s lovely,” Alba replies, “don’t worry. She was just listening, really.”

I glare suspiciously at the Wallorian Treasurer, a magical breed renowned for taking advantage of people, and sigh.

“The idea of having someone living with me is weird,” Alba says but suddenly adds, “but in a good way! I never had siblings.”

“Oh, I’ll be your older sister, then!” Amelia beams. “I can teach you how to cook and look for a good marriage!”

I snort so loud I think I just hurt my nose.

“Amelia!” Alba says bashfully.

“Don’t worry; I’ll take care of you! And you haven’t told me what kind of guys you like!”

“Amelia!” Alba says again, sorrowfully, probably already regretting her choice.

“I have an idea!” Amelia declares.

“Oh, pray tell,” I say, very amused by all of this.

“We should take a walk around the academy’s library and bring some food with us. I can strike up some conversations and get you to know a few more guys! That way, we can learn your type!”

“Anyway, we’ll be out of your ears now,” Amelia says, basically dragging Alba away with her.

“You need help moving?”

“Oh, no, I didn’t bring much to the academy. Maybe I’ll go look for a job later.”

“Have fun,” I say while waving at them.

As soon as they are out of the door, I kick awake both Marcellus and Anneus.

“Aw, what’s happening?” Marcellus groans.josei

“What are you doing?!” Anneus screams, frustrated.

“Shut up, both of you,” I order, “let’s get something into your stomach. We need to talk. Also, I need to go for a walk and stretch my muscles. Let’s get going.”

…

You know, I would usually consider the morning a sacred time not to be disrupted by anything, not even myself. But this situation with Amelia must be discussed, and I’d like to make these two little idiots more responsible.

“So, what? What is it that you want to discuss? Are you a criminal mastermind on top of everything? What’s all this secrecy?”

Anneus has been whining since he woke up. I don’t know… honestly, sometimes I wish he would remember I actually killed people. I know it’s a horrid thing to say, but can’t a man who capped several [Mages], including a potential [Archmage], get a bit more respect? And, in a way, I am a criminal mastermind. I smuggled away so much money from the national treasury that it’s a miracle I didn’t get a [Thief] class. [Magical Thief]. That would have been fun.

Should I start behaving more like an asshole? Like, how do you get people to fear you a bit more? But I just really want Anneus to be less ball-busting. How does that work without necessarily scaring everyone away?

Also, why can’t I take [Archmage] Alonna belly-tackling me like Kung-Fu Panda out of my mind?

“We have something very serious to discuss, you little prick,” I say with a serious face. “Remember, Anneus. I am the Human who killed Appius, the rising star of the Nine Towers Academy. Don’t act like an asshole if I told you—”

“Can’t you just explain what it is instead of losing all this time?” he completely ignores my threats.

I exhale loudly.

“Okay, whatever. Let’s talk.”