Chapter 64: Florida Man Finds Explosive Grenade Ownership License in Scratching Lottery Tickets
Chapter 64: Florida Man Finds Explosive Grenade Ownership License in Scratching Lottery Tickets
Main Quest #7: Learn Phoenix Breathing Method!
With a stable passive income and a house, you're set for life. However, you're living in an undeveloped dictatorship monarchy country that promotes conflicts and hierarchical inequality. Sooner or later, someone will covet your assets or want you dead.
To avoid such a scenario, you need to establish authority. The easiest authority you can acquire right now is 'Strength'. As long as you are strong enough, you can deter a lot of troublesome issues. This quest shall serve as motivation for you to pursue strength.
Objective: Learn the following skills without relying on the system: Flame Aura, Flame Mana, Fire Breathe, and Fireball Spitting. Rewards: Dimensional House Add-On, Mystery Crate (Class E) x 10
…
Fortunately, no time limit was imposed this time. Felix let out a long sigh, relieved he didn't need to stress out like he did in the past month.
Looking at the rewards, he remembered certain items he had ignored for a whole month—Mystery Crates (Class F). He still had 10 of them and recalled the rates.
…
Mystery Crate (Class F)
This crate contains a random tool, item, or system perks. Once used, a new item in the Florida Man Online Store will be unlocked, allowing you to purchase additional Mystery Crates.
Upon opening the crate, you will obtain one of the following items according to a set probability as follows:
- Mystery Crate (Class E) x1 - 1.5%
- Mystery Crate (Class F) x2 - 2.0%
- Fragmentation Hand Grenade Permit - 8.5%*
- Karabiner 98k Production Permit - 11%*
- Emergency Call-In Beacon x3 - 12%
- Carton of Phoenix's Ash Cigars x1 - 15%
- Supply Crate (Class E) x3 - 20%
- Supply Crate (Class F) x10 - 30%
*Note: These items are unique. Once you obtain them, they will disappear from the list.
…
Last time, Felix got the mana ammunition manufacturing system and three additional emergency beacon balls. With 10 extra crates sitting in his inventory for a long time, Felix decided to get rid of them by using them. He pressed the activate button and prayed to the RNGesus.
*DING*
<You have obtained Supply Crate (Class F) x 10.>
<You have obtained Emergency Call-In Beacon x 3.>
<You have obtained Emergency Call-In Beacon x 3.>
<You have obtained Carton of Phoenix's Ash Cigars x 1.>
<You have obtained Carton of Phoenix's Ash Cigars x 1.>
<You have obtained Supply Crate (Class E) x 3.>
<You have obtained Carton of Phoenix's Ash Cigars x 1.>
<You have obtained Emergency Call-In Beacon x 3.>
Felix's luck was bad. Eight out of 10 were consolation rewards and uncommon items. Praying harder, Felix closed his eyes, not wanting to look at the last two results. After all, in gacha games, the rare draws usually come last.
<You have obtained Carton of Phoenix's Ash Cigars x 1.>
As expected, the ninth draw failed. However, the last one was different.
<You have obtained Mystery Crate (Class E) x 1.>
Felix slowly opened his eyes and peeked at the message. Realizing that he won the 1.5% chance, Felix smacked his forehead. He didn't want this prize; he wanted the permits.
"Man, this sucks. Anyway…"
Since Felix got the new gacha box, he thought he might as well use it. Checking the item's description and gacha rate, Felix read the item description.
…
Mystery Crate (Class E)
This crate contains a random tool, item, or system perks. Once used, a new item in the Florida Man Online Store will be unlocked, allowing you to purchase additional Mystery Crates.
Upon opening the crate, you will obtain one of the following items according to a set probability as follows:
- Mystery Crate (Class D) x 1 - 1%
- Mystery Crate (Class E) x 2 - 2%
- Phoenix Dawn Needle x 1 - 3%
- Dimensional Garden Permit - 6%*
- Essence Stones x 10 - 8%
- Elixir of Bone Reconstruction x 5 - 10%
- Emergency Call-In Beacon x 5 - 10%
- Supply Crate (Class D) x 3 - 10%
- Fragmentation Hand Grenade Permit - 15%*
- Karabiner 98k Production Permit - 15%*
- Supply Crate (Class E) x 10 - 20%
*Note: These items are unique. Once you obtain them, they will disappear from the list.
…
There were more items than the F-Class crate, and the permits Felix wanted had a higher chance of dropping.
Felix didn't believe his luck would be that terrible. Activating this gacha box right away, Felix clapped his hands and raised them overhead while he screamed.
"Come on! 36% for the permits!!"
Jessica shook her head but faintly smiled as if she knew what would come out next.
DING
<You have obtained Fragmentation Hand Grenade Permit.>
<The Arsenal of Freedom System has been updated. New items have been added.>
"LET'S GOOOOOOOOOO!!"
Felix jumped around and squealed like a monkey on stimulants. His voice was so loud that Valley and Jane could hear him from the first floor.
Although creating bombs using the spirit stones was nice, it consumed a lot of energy, and crafting them was time-consuming. On the other hand, the Arsenal of Freedom System was instant and didn't require him to squeeze his fingertip for blood.
Motivated, Felix opened the weapon crafting menu and planned to stock up on grenades for fun.
.
.
50 Miles South of Terra City
While Felix, Jane, and Valley enjoyed their slow life, Garudeer and his allies confronted the retreating Lamia Army. Four archmages levitated in the sky, surrounding the monster troops from above. Diana and Zhu Xin Ci, however, remained unfazed. They looked up and sneered, mocking the vanguard archmages.
Diana gazed at Garudeer and scoffed, "It has been a while, my dear husband. Have you come here to visit your daughter?"
Zhu Xin Ci crossed her arms and spat, "Why haven't you died yet, father? I'm tired of seeing your face."
Garudeer's expression darkened. He didn't want Diana to remind him and his followers of his dark past. Ignoring his former wife and abandoned daughter, he raised a long staff and completed seven magic circuits at once, preparing a grand spell.
"How rude," Zhu Xin Ci mocked her father. "Are you trying to kill your pregnant daughter?"
Garudeer had enough. He bellowed, "Silence! I never had a daughter like you!"
Diana giggled, "Yes, you do. Actually, you had three. You were really passionate when we were alone, fertilizing three eggs inside me at once."
Garudeer's three followers gave their headmaster a weird look, unaware of his dark past. Still, they didn't question or doubt Garudeer. Without hesitation, they started chanting a long incantation while manifesting several magic circuits in mid-air. Black clouds rapidly gathered, and thunderclouds condensed.
*RUMBLE*
A thunderbolt struck the middle of the Lamia Army, killing ten elites at once. The thunderclouds condensed more electricity, ready to strike again.
Diana narrowed her eyes, realizing that Garudeer was serious. She ordered her troops, "Scatter and retreat to Black Forest. I'll deal with these geezers alone. As for you, Xin Ci, if I can't return within a month, you'll be the next queen of the forest!"
Zhu Xin Ci sneered at her mother. She turned to her people and gestured them to flee in every direction to avoid pursuits.
After parting with her daughter, Diana sprang to the sky, arriving in front of Garudeer instantly. She threw a punch at his face.
*CLANK*
Diana's fist hit a transparent barrier, cracking it. Garudeer's solemn face twitched as his spell was interrupted.
"Still a brute as always," Garudeer smacked his lips and flew backward, traveling a mile instantly.
Diana's body exuded blue light and transformed into a mass of water. Then, it scattered everywhere. The next moment, a droplet of water condensed behind Garudeer and transformed into the Lamia Queen.
Garudeer sensed Diana's presence and bellowed, "That teleportation trick no longer works on me! LIGHTNING STORM!"
Raising his staff, a massive lightning bolt descended from Heaven and struck Diana, burning her to a crisp. However, a new water droplet emerged from the thunderclouds and absorbed wind mana from its surroundings. A new body of Diana emerged.
The Lamia queen hovered over the thunderclouds, looking down on Garudeer and his followers. She glanced at her charred shoulders and chest, which had been affected by the lightning.
"I just hate hysterical men. Oh, well."
Diana gathered her water mana and condensed a million bubbles of water around herself. Her cold eyes fixated on Garudeer.
"You've forced my hand, husband. Now, become food for my people!"
Diana threw a million water balls at Garudeer and his men.
Garudeer's followers also finished their incantation. They flipped the floating magic circles to face Diana from afar and shouted in unison.
A thousand vacuum tornadoes rushed out from the green magic circuits and chased after Diana. However, they collided with the water bubbles, which instantly exploded.