HP: I Have "Pure" Magic

Chapter 122: Going down the assh*le

Chapter 122: Going down the assh*le

Knowing that he can't get Snape expelled like Lockhart and has to study under him for a few more years, Chris went with the voice of reason as he suppressed the dragon pride.

"Well, I guess an explaination is in order," Said Chris as he looked at all the teachers, "I have researched extensively about the Chamber, like everyone else. And from my research, I have found out that it has already been opened once before and one student even died at that time." He said, showing them that he wasn't playing around willy-nilly here.

"Were you aware of that, professor Snape?" he asked, knowing that there's a high chance that the man didn't know. Snape wasn't even born back then.

"Why mister Potter, even I have only ever heard rumors about that. Let alone Professors Snape." said Professor Flitwick, looking surprised at Chris's knowledge.

Myrtle died in 1943 and McGonagall and Flitwick only attended Hogwarts in 1947 and 1945 respectively. So, it's not surprising that they don't know much about the girl who died two years before even that. (Voldemort suddenly seems quite old, doesn't he? The man is much older than even McGonagall.)

Now Chris had all the teacher's attention as they realized that he was indeed not playing around. Even Snape didn't say anything and

Dumbledore was looking at Chris curiously, his earlier plans were completely ruined. But, only he was to be blamed for all this. Chris wouldn't have interfered if it was of no risk like last time, but a basilisk is really no joke. Many things could go wrong. So, Dumbledore better just suck it up. Who told him to have such absurd plans?

Chris continued his explaination. "By coincidence, I found out that the girl who died was actually the same girl who's been haunting this bathroom for almost 50 years."

"What?!"

"You mean..."

"!!!"

The professors were very nice audience. Feeling like a Professor teaching his students, and fully enjoying the irony, Chris nodded.

"Yes. The Moaning Myrtle, as you all know her, was actually killed by the Slytherin's monster itself."

"So, along with all the other places of attacks, I searched the bathroom as well. And, I did find something." Said Chris as he entered the bathroom with the teachers following behind him.

Chris didn't waste any time and walked straight to the giant marble sink.

"Professors, please check this out." He said, he light up his wand and gestured towards the Slytherin's mark on the out of order tap on the sink.

The professors all leaned to see what Chris was pointing at.

"Merlin's beard..."

"This could it!"

"That's indeed Slytherin's mark."

The teachers all began muttering among themselves. And Dumbledore took out his wand and started casting god knows what spells on the entrance seemingly in an attempt to open it.

"It needs a password to open." he said at last. Currently, seems very serious and gives off an aura of sobriety. It's as if he's really finding out about the entrance for the first time and is going to see the face the Slytherin's monster.

'I can never be sure if he's acting or not.' thought Chris wryly as the teachers began to examine the tap, trying to open it.

'I'd have love to make a video out of this scene.' Thought Chris as he saw all the head of Houses, and the Headmaster bent over the sink.

This guy was also taking full satisfaction in seeing the teachers actually do something for once instead of having a bunch of kids do it for them.

"It can't be opened. We would need to use Parseltongue to open it." said Dumbledore at at last.

'Dude, do you seriously not know that Harry here is a Parselmouth? Cause I'd definitely fooled if didn't know any better.' Thought Chris inwardly.

There's, of course, a chance that Dumbledore indeed doesn't know about Harry being a Parselmouth this time, because 'detailed and deep' Legilimency actually takes constant eye contact for a long duration of you don't have a super trigger blue like Chris the cheater. Maybe, Dumbledore didn't/couldn't read the memories about Harry being able to talk to snakes yet.

After Dumbledore said that they'd need someone who's able to speak Parseltongue for that, the Professors almost lost their hopes. Parseltongue is like, a superrare ability, and also associated with dark wizards, but as Harry and Chris exchanged looks, Harry awkwardly raised his hand, "Err... Professor, I can speak Parseltongue."

"...."

The Professors were speechless. Snape sneered at Harry. "Mr. Potter, we do not have time for your bragging and lies for getting attention. Either keep your loud mouth shut or leave."

Chris sighed exasperatedly at this petty man's behavior. 'Really man, you're the one who's got the loudest mouth here. And the longest nose. Reminds me of that 'Despicable Me' movie dude.'

Chris had to of course defend Harry before Harry unwittingly curses the man.

"Professor, he's telling the truth." Taking out his wand, he pointed it at the sink.

"Serpensortia."

A small snake appeared and got hung onto the serpent symbol tap.

"Harry, try saying 'open'." said Chris.

Harry nodded and concentrated. "$Open$"

The professors were beyond shocked when they heard the hissing from Harry. The real Parseltongue is something that's you can't produce with your mouth. The sound very...inhuman. It doesn't sound like something a human can produce.

But, as if that wasn't enough of a shock, in the next second, they saw the tap glow with a brilliant white light as it began to spin. Next second, the sink began to move; the sink, in fact, sank, right out of sight, leaving a large pipe exposed, a pipe wide enough for a man to slide into.

McGonagall and Sprout gasped. Snape's eyes widened and Dumbledore looked Harry through his half moon spectacles. While Flitwick?

"Merlin's Butthole." muttered Flitwick as he looked at the infamous chamber of secrets entrance in person. According to Flitwick, the charm work required to build that should be magnificent. The magic geek lost his composure for a moment and said out loud the first words that came to his mind.

"Pfft." Chris struggled to keep in his laughter. That's the reason why Flitwick is his favorite teacher at Hogwarts.

'Merlin's Butthole?! I'm definitely keeping that one. Thanks professor, you always manage to teach me something new.'

McGonagall forcefully stepped on Flitwick's feet, "Mind your language, Filius. There are students here." she said out of habbit. She'd have made a bigger fuss if she herself hadn't inwardly swore worse words than Flitwick just now in her mind. So she can't really blame Flitwick right now.

"My apologies to everyone, I lost my composure for a bit. And Mr. Potter, I would have never guessed that you could actually speak Parseltongue!" he enthused, making Harry scratch his head in embarrassment.

"Filius, we have more important things to do right now." said Professor Sprout as she looked into the long tunnel.

Dumbledore called a house elf and asked it do bring brooms for everyone here. Flying is actually a bit tricky in the wizarding world. Spells like levitation are only up and down there's no 3-d movement in that. That's why Voldemort flying was quite a big deal. Dumbledore might be able to fly and Flitwick might be able to fly, but it's not worth it you can't use your wand to for that whole duration.

Before descending, McGonagall still opposed Chris and Harry going in with them once, but Dumbledore refused. Chris wasn't really worried right now. Dumbledore has no reason to specifically stop Chris from entering. In fact, it's quite the opposite. And they'd of course need Harry to get past the next lock. And they wouldn't know how many such locks there are in the up ahead.

As they all flew down the seemingly endless, slimy, dark slide. They could see more pipes branching off in all directions, but none as large as theirs, which twisted and turned, sloping steeply downward. They were falling deeper below the school than even the dungeons.

All the teachers and Harry had quite tense and solemn expressions, while Chris was taking this as a field trip. He was a bit sad he didn't have pop corns for later.

When they finally reached down bottom, Dumbledore flicked his wand, sending out a ball of light that illuminated the whole tunnel.

*Gasp*

"Oh Merlin!"

The Professors exclaimed when they saw the giant Basilisk skin lying right across the tunnel.

"Is that...the shed skin of a snake?!" asked

"How is that... possible?" muttered McGonagall, and all other people other agreed. The huge size really seems to completely change their perception of what they were going to face.

Chris experimentally fired a few Cutting hexes on the skin.

*Ting* *TingTing*

It was able to block all and it only left a few scratches.

"Damn." Chris whistled. When a magical snake sheds it's skin, the old one is completely sucked of all it's magic and durability making it very weak. That's why the shed skin is worth much less than the one obtained directly from the corpse. Because once the snake dies, the magic and durability of the skin is preserved, making it much more durable than the shed skin. If the cutting hex isn't even working on the shed skin, you can only imagine the durability of the current skin of the basilisk.

In short, the real basilisk skin is going to be much much tougjer than even this husk lying here.

"Professor, I think that's a Basilisk skin." said Chris, making the Professors worse fears come true.

"A basilisk's gaze can Petrify anyone." He said, making them remember the Petrified students. He then proceeded to explain how all the Petrified students must have seen the Basilisk through reflection.

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Martin, this situation has become very dangerous now. We can't bring you with us anymore." said McGonagall, once again being annoying.

"It's too late, Professor. The basilisk could be anywhere, even in the pipes behind us. We'd be the safest when we're with you. We'll keep our eyes on the ground the whole time." said Chris.

"Michael might be in real danger right now." added Harry helpfully.

"I think it'll be fine to bring them along, Minerva." said Dumbledore.

Chris wasn't much worried. Now that he's in, almost half of his objective is already achieved. He can always turn insible and follow them further.

They walked past the carcass vigilantly and there was another lock in front of them.

"Err...do I try opening it?" asked Harry when he saw the teachers were once again trying to open it by themselves.

"That would be most helpful, Harry." said Dumbledore shamelessly. McGonagall coughed in embarrassment in when she saw Chris giving her the stink eye.

'Bitch, you were gonna send us back just now, huh?' If they had done that, they would have, of course, gotten stuck here right now and would have needed to bring Harry back.

Now they really can't send Harry back, in case there are more things that might require Parseltongue.

"$Open$"

Harry opened the door them and the group found themselves at the end of a very long, dimly lit chamber. Towering stone pillars entwined with more carved serpents rose to support a ceiling lost in darkness, casting long, black shadows through the odd, greenish gloom that filled the place.

They moved forward between the serpentine columns. Their footsteps echoed loudly off the shadowy walls, untill Flitwick silenced it all with a charm. The

Then, as he drew level with the last pair of pillars, a statue high as the Chamber itself loomed into view, standing against the back wall. The hollow eye-sockets of the stone snakes seemed to follow them as they moved. As they drew level with the last pair of pillars, a statue high as the Chamber itself loomed into view, standing against the back wall.

Right at that moment, suddenly

***

Tom Riddle thought that this day was going to be the beginning of his new reign. The process of taking over the foolish boy's body had become really fast after his jealousy had reached it's peak. If not for the dueling club event, he was expecting it to at least take two or three months before he succeeds.

And today, he was finally going to come to life! So, he decided to make this day a special day which everyone would always remember! For today is the day Lord Voldemort finally begins taking over the world again.

(The worst Chuunibyou patient was, of course, the Tom Riddle, the boy who gave himself an acronym 'Lord Voldemort' and even tried making himself immortal.)

That's why, he made so many attacks today and even wrote the message of this boy Marcus's death. With this, Dumbledore would officially be expelled from the school. And then, as soon as he, Lord Voldemort gains his body back, he'll be able to go after Harry Potter without anyone being able to stop him.

Right now, he just has to wait for while in this Chamber for his resurrection. No one can come and disturb him in here, because, no one would able to speak Parseltongue in this age. He is the last Heir of Slytherin line.

While he having future fantasies, he suddenly heard the door to the Chamber suddenly open!

Tom Riddle was surprised, to say the least! He wasn't expecting visitors tonight. He had just planned to have a peaceful night alone spending his time sucking the life out of this boy and wait for Dumbledore's expulsion.

How could the Chamber entrance open right now?! Is there someone else who can speak Parseltongue?!

This time, Harry's Parseltongue status hadn't been revealed to the general public, so Riddle still thought that he was absolutely safe in here.

Riddle peeked from behind the statue.

"!!!!"

And almost pissed his pants when he saw who it was.

It was his worst nightmare. The 16 year old boy got traumatized just by seeing the impressive line Chris had brought with him.

But then, he gathered his wits back. He's a Slytherin! So he'll use the Slytherin way to handle this situation.

***

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