Maybe a Fake Gintama

Chapter 206: Marriage Is the Tomb of Love? So Marriage = Suicide?

Chapter 206: Marriage Is the Tomb of Love? So Marriage = Suicide?

"Gin-chan, little uncle," Kagura asked while lying on the table, "Is Big Sis going to get married-aru?"

"Who knows," Kawaki finished the glass of Parfait in one breath and sighed, "The cola-flavored Parfait is also good~."

"Then will I still be able to see Big Sis in the future-aru?" Kagura continued to ask.

"It's just a marriage, not a funeral," Gintoki waved his hand, "We will definitely meet again."

"But, Mommy said that marriage is the tomb of love," Kagura continued, "Although I don't quite understand if it's a tomb, does it mean that Big Sis is going to have something important buried?"

"What? Is it her gorilla power?" Gintoki said with a look of disapproval.

"You... are an idiot, right?" Kawaki scoffed expressionlessly and then looked at Kagura again, "It's not the kid's turn to worry about the adults."

"But... Big Sis doesn't want to cause trouble for everyone even in the end," Kagura murmured, "Moreover, Big Sis is crying-aru."

"A woman's heart is the most difficult thing in the world to understand," Kawaki explained, "Moreover, isn't it common sense for a girl to cry when she is about to get married? Have you ever seen a girl who doesn't cry when she gets married? This is a tradition, a tradition!"

Gintoki nodded in agreement.

"But..." Kagura still wanted to say something, but she didn't know what to say.

"Actually, it's useless for you to tell the two of us about this," Kawaki sighed, "After all, neither Gintoki nor I have any experience in getting married. You can only ask her about this kind of thing."

"But..." As she spoke, Kagura took out her phone, "I sent several messages to Big Sis, but she never replied back to me."

"Maybe she is busy making preparations," Kawaki said casually, "Isn't it a tomb or something? Maybe she's busy digging pits now."

"Oh! It sounds interesting!" Kagura was instantly interested, "I also want to dig a hole-aru!"

After saying that, Kagura prepared to send a message to Otae to ask her if she needed help in digging a tomb.

"How is that possible!" Gintoki stood up and punched Kawaki and Kagura's heads, "She should be in her bride training! There are a lot of things to learn before getting married!"

"Bride training? What is that?" Kawaki asked doubtfully.

"It is to learn the skills of a wife such as cooking, cleaning, teaching children, etc." Gintoki explained, "In short, it is very troublesome."

"Gintoki, it seems that you are quite experienced." Kawaki looked at Gintoki with a face full of ridicule, "Have you experienced it before?"

"How is that possible?! Isn't it always like this on TV?!" Gintoki retorted and then showed a face of yearning, "But I'm looking forward to it, the appearance of anchor Ketsuno as my wife..."

"Gin-chan, do you like that kind of second-hand goods-aru" Kagura looked at Gintoki with a shocked face.

"I almost forgot!" Gintoki slapped his head, "I almost forgot that anchor Ketsuno is divorced! In that case, she doesn't need to do the bride training! Just marry directly! I'm really looking forward to it..."

Looking at Gintoki, who had fallen into daydreaming while drooling and laughing, Kawaki and Kagura were both speechless.

"But the person that Otae chose is really unexpected," Kawaki crossed his arms and said casually, "It's eyepatch and shorty. I always feel that it is somewhat similar to Takaji. If I knew that she liked that type, I would introduce Takaji to her."

"Now that you mention it, it really does seem like it." Gintoki nodded, "And both of them seem to be a young master."

"I just don't know if that shorty likes to drink Yakult too." Kawaki continued, "If he likes them, then their attributes basically overlap."

"Impossible; how could Takasugi like that kind of cliff." Gintoki waved his hand.

"That makes sense, hahahaha," Kawaki laughed, "I remember that you and Takaji like the same type."

"How is that possible!" Gintoki shouted.

"No, didn't you almost fight over the same woman when we went to hanamachi together?" Kawaki was puzzled.

(TL notes: A hanamachi is a district where geisha live and work in Japan. Each hanamachi typically has its own name, crest, and distinct geisha population, with geisha not typically working outside of their own district. Hanamachi usually contain okiya(lodging house/drinking establishment) and ochaya(tea house).)

"I don't even remember anything like that!"

"No, no, I remember very clearly. At that time, everyone went to celebrate winning a battle." Kawaki replied. "No, not everyone. Zura didn't go and in the end..."

"In the end? What happened in the end?" Kagura asked doubtfully.

"In the end, that woman chose Takaji. For this matter, Gintoki had been sulking for a long time." Kawaki said with a smile.

"Gin-chan, you actually lost to that purple-haired shorty in the past?! Gin-chan, you are too inferior!" Kagura said exaggeratedly.

"I don't remember such a thing." Gintoki curled his lips and said.

"Forget it; let's stop here today." As he spoke, Kawaki stood up and stretched, "I'm going back to play a new game. See you later."

"Wait!" Gintoki hurriedly stood up and pressed down on Kawaki's shoulder, "You seem to have forgotten something, right?"

"What?" Kawaki was puzzled.

"What are you pretending for?! Payment! Our part of the Payment!" Gintoki scolded, "Don't you need to pay me after you finish your entrusted work? You bastard!"

"I almost forgot." Only then did Kawaki react. He then took out two thin envelopes from his bosom and handed them to the two of them, "Then, goodbye."

"Wait!" Gintoki quickly stopped him and waved the envelope in front of Kawaki, "Can you explain why it's so little? Why is this envelope as thin as a piece of paper? Why can I hear the sound of coins inside?"

"Do you still remember how much beef you two ate?" Kawaki said expressionlessly, "Can't you be a little bit more self-conscious? The beef you two eat is enough to pay you several jobs!"

"Stop joking! You are just fooling people!" Gintoki retorted.

"It should be you guys! Do you think that place is a cheap cafeteria?!" Kawaki retorted righteously, "You ate the high-grade wagyu beef, okay? And... you two ate four whole cows!"

"Didn't you eat it too?!" Gintoki shouted.

"No, I only ate a cup of Parfait," Kawaki replied, "From beginning to end, only the two of you ate."

"Don't joke around, that kind of thing..." Gintoki lowered his head, his face already dark to the extreme.

However, when Gintoki raised his head and was about to flip out, he finally discovered that Kawaki had already secretly slipped away.

"That bastard..." Gintoki said through gritted teeth.

...

A few days later, in the morning.

Kawaki opened the window and took a breath of fresh air before looking up at the dark sky. Then, he lowered his head to look at the women who were holding umbrellas on the streets downstairs.

"It's cloudy again," Kawaki sighed slightly, "In this kind of weather, I should stay at home and play games."

"Brother Kawaki, the food is ready!" Seita's voice came.

"I got it."

After breakfast, in Kawaki's room.

"Why are you here?" Kawaki glanced at Seita and continued expressionlessly, "Isn't today Sunday? Don't you need to go to the dojo?"

"Sister Otae isn't there, and Brother Shinpachi has always been absent-minded," Seita explained with an embarrassed smile, "Brother Shinpachi asked me to go home and practice by myself."

"Really," Kawaki sighed softly, "Hasn't Shinpachi-kun move on yet?"

"Move on? What do you mean?" Seita asked doubtfully, "What happened?"

"It has nothing to do with you," Kawaki said casually. Then he looked at the computer screen in front of him again, "Didn't you say you were going to practice at home? Then why did you come here? Hurry up and go."

"I got it." Seita nodded and stood up. He walked to the empty space in Kawaki's room, picked up the bamboo sword he used for practice, and waved it.

"Ha! Ha!"

A full minute passed, but Kawaki surprisingly did not flare up.

"Ha! Ha!"

Two minutes passed, but Kawaki still did not flare up.

"Ha! Ha!"

Three minutes later, Kawaki finally could not take it anymore. He took off his headphones and kicked Seita out of the room. He then cursed, "Don't overdo it! Practicing at home means going to my room to practice?! Your so noisy, smelly brat!"

"There's no other way! Sister Tsukuyo and Mom don't know swordsmanship," Seita stood up and curled his lips.

"Then you want to bother me?!" Kawaki was furious, "If you want to practice, go find Naruto!"

In the end, Kawaki sighed and picked up his umbrella. He turned around and walked out of the room without looking back.

"Brother Kawaki, where are you going?" Seita shouted.

"Get the boy in charge of teaching you swordsmanship back," Kawaki waved his hand and replied, "Really, since he has accepted it, he should teach you properly. This is the first time I have seen such an irresponsible dojo..."

Seita's eyes lit up with joy, but before he could say anything, Kawaki had already gone far away.

"Where is that idiot?" Tsukuyo walked over and asked.

"It seems to be going to a parent-teacher meeting." Seita scratched his head in embarrassment and explained.

"Parent-teacher meeting?" Tsukuyo asked, a little puzzled, "Did you cause trouble in school again?"

"No!"

...

At this time, Shinpachi and Kondo seemed to have made an appointment and met at the entrance of Yagyu's residence. Both of them were wearing casual clothes and bamboo hats with wooden swords in their waists.

Facing the two Yagyu residence guards, Shinpachi and Kondo lowered their heads without saying a word.

A guard threw out an arrogant expression and sneered at the two, "Who are you, people? You want to join our school? I'm sorry, this is Yagyu's."

"We are a prestigious family. If you are not famous, I'm afraid... Tsk, tsk, tsk, or do you want to challenge our dojo?" Another guard continued; the disdain in his words was self-evident.