Soul for a Girlfriend?

Chapter 179 - Tainted Silver Serenity Of Her Sins

Lilith's POV (Sakamaki's Narration)

***Graphic Scenes, Reader's Discretion Advised***

This entire chapter is from Lilith's perspective, but it's being narrated by Sakamaki.

"But Father… I didn't…" With agony in her voice, which seemed to have matured since the last memory when she was a child, she said but the man interrupted her, "You are a Disgrace!"

Father?

So the man in the courtroom and the one in front of my eyes were none other than her father. There were similarities in them, and the prominent ones were the silver hair and crimson coloured eyes.

It appeared as if the man wasn't even giving her a chance to explain herself; he kept repeating the same thing repeatedly, "You're nothing but a Disgrace to the Divinus Family!"

This phrase kept ringing in my ear as the voice gradually grew louder and it became impossible for me to think of anything else other than these words, which carried an unbelievable amount of weight behind them.

Suddenly it again felt like I was shifting as I felt the same gut wrenching feeling of my innards being stirred up and a constant urge to throw up. At this point, I couldn't see my face, but I was sure that the face I was making wasn't a normal one.

A glimpse of a church flashed in my eyes and I was in a position from where I could look at every single person. But the weird thing was that all the people sitting were looking at me. Their eyes were looking directly up at me.

I looked around and noticed the Father of Church mumbling something under his breath, as I shifted my eyes towards the other people there who were now standing up, holding the holy cross in their hands.

In a matter of seconds, I felt a little weird on my neck and everyone in front of me appeared to be going up instantly and moving left. As the reality of the situation struck me, all the hairs on my body stood right up. I have never felt this level of fear in my life.

I shifted my eyes a little towards my left, and the mere sight was horrifying. The body of Lilith, with her hands cuffed in a guillotine, and her head wasn't there. Instead, a pool of blood seeped out from her decapitated body.

The immense fear and reality of the situation were so surreal that I was confused. It felt like my body was frozen in time as all of this took place right before my eyes.

Again, the scene wrapped in a new one, where I could see myself sitting with a young man in a room alone. The warmth of the fire burning in the furnace.

The young man had a head full of thick black hairand had quite a pale face. Probably because it was cold outside, they were under the same blanket. I could feel the warmth coming from his body, as hands were bracing me in.

For some reason, his cheeks and nose were red. Tears were rolling down his eyes, and he had a really calm, yet agonizing expression on his face. In that moment, Lilith was also feeling vulnerable that her fingers were wrapping around his hands tightly.

The man looked me right in the eyes. His azure eyes reflecting the light coming from the furnace almost made it appear like his eyes were red. He threw away the blanket and stood up.

Still, his eyes were locked on me as he cradled my hand. His touch was so weak, almost like he was touching something really fragile that would break apart even in the slightest of pressure.

Leaning towards me while his hands slowly tugged on mine, he smiled warmly. My hands were finally on his chest, and I could feel his heart beating viciously. My vision also started getting blurry as tears were forming in them.

And before I could even comprehend what was happening, I noticed my right hand digging deep inside his chest, as blood gushed out from the hole and into his mouth. I could feel his heart beating in my palm.

I looked up at his face, as his life was slowly leaving his body, but the gentle smile was still on his face. His hands reached around me and embraced me, which made my hand dig into his chest.

Tears were running down my eyes, and I was screaming in pain. Frustration was a feeling that she was feeling the most at that time. Just before his lifeless hit the ground, his bloodied hands caressed my hairs.

I looked at my hand, dripping with the blood of that man with whom I was sharing a moment of intimacy a few moments ago. His heart was still beating in my hand as I threw it away into the corner of the room and fell down on my knees.

My eyes unknowingly shifted towards his corpse lying in the middle of the room, as blood was flowing out rapidly. Stains of his blood remained on my silver hair. 

"These stains shall never make me forget my sins." She thought while clenching her hairs tightly in her hands as the silence in the room overwhelmed her. The faint noise of sobbing complemented by the cracking of the firewood made the atmosphere even heavier than what it was.

My human brain could not comprehend what was going on in a mere matter of seconds. The amount of things happening, the flood of emotions, the amount of fear, and Lilith's own traumatic experiences were frying up my brain.

Was sweating a lot and my heart was throbbing. It was probably so loud in that moment that I could feel the cardiac muscles contracting with each passing second as if they were in my hands. My headache was getting worse.

I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore, as my vision kept getting darker and darker. This time, it was me whose eyes were closing, not Lilith. Soon, it felt like my body was floating away and my consciousness left.

I found myself regaining my senses, as it felt like a faint voice was calling out my name. But the voice sounded really familiar, but very distant. Yet, I felt like the person calling out my name was really close to me.