Chapter 100 - Trust, Lies, Secrets And Relationships
Chapter 100 - Trust, Lies, Secrets And Relationships
They kept on walking at a slow pace.
Zhenyi's mind was in frenzy. Though she answered the question honestly, what happened in the morning came back to remind her that her marriage was not wine and roses. they had their own messes to deal with.
Long Jie's fear of sharing his past with her, Zhenyi's fear of getting her trust broken again, and their fear of failing to each other.
"How do you live with it?" Zhenyi asked her in almost a whisper.
"With what? " Grandmother Mian asked her in confusion. she didn't get what Zhenyi meant by ' it'.
"With lies and secrets," Zhenyi answered her question much to ease the elderly woman's confusion.
She looked at Zhenyi, her eyes were dull, weary, and aged. Her eyes spoke of her pains and struggle.
"Lies...you just know when your man is lying to you. If he is truly your man, you can filter truth out of his words. It's so instinctive like just breathing." She paused for a moment and then went on, " If you can't filter it out, you need to look into his soul and heart which he will claim doesn't exist. But it does, it is for us to see to peek at it. "
Long jie.
He claimed he didn't have a heart, he was too tainted to have one. but he was wrong, so wrong. he had one but what he didn't know was that it was just for her to see and read.
"As for secrets, these men have theirs and us women have ours. secrets never shake the foundation of relationships, lack of trust does." Her words hit zhenyi hard.
'Secrets never shake the foundation of relationships, lack of trust does.'
Long Jie was right when he told her, ' for there to be betrayal there have to have trust first .'
She claimed to trust him, but did she actually? She didn't know now. her past got the best out of her, she tried to measure him with the measurement tape of her own past which was neither good nor right.
"When I came to this family I was afraid, afraid that his fondness for secrets might destroy our marriage. As the time went on I realized that they were his secrets to keep, to bury, or to hide, " she said to Zhenyi. And at that moment Zhenyi could see the naked ache in the old woman's heart through her eyes. She added in almost a whisper, " It had nothing to do with me, but it was very difficult to compromise with this fact. My heart just won't understand such a simple fact. "
A woman has the power to tolerate any hardship or struggle for her husband and family, but not enough to bear her husband's secrets. She can walk hell and heaven for her man if he asked her to, but first, he has to show her the way and, then she will do what he asks for.
Zhenyi was the same in this aspect, she wanted Long Jie to show the destination he wanted to walk to, and then she would hold his hand and walk with him wherever he headed -- hell or heaven, it didn't matter to her as long as he was with her.
Seeing that Zhenyi didn't speak, grandmother Mian spoke again, "The curiosity got the best of me, and I unearthed them one day. It was one of the saddest days of my life. We never knew the secrets we so badly wanted to dig is more haunting and painful than we can ever imagine."
Zhenyi looked at her again and said, "you mean, I should not dig things that do not belong to me."
Grandmother was right. the secrets didn't belong to her in the first place. And in her heart, she was aware of the fact that his past didn't describe the Long Jie in present. If she knew this, then what was the meaning in going for something that she didn't need?
She made the decision that she would never force him to whatever ghosts he was hiding. But if one day he wanted to tell her, she would be there listening to him and comforting him without any prejudice.
"See, I know you are an intelligent girl." She patted Zhenyi's head lovingly and said again, "come sit with me."
They sat on the chairs set in the middle of the vast garden.
Grandmother willingly initiated the new topic much to Zhenyi's discomfort. "your mother, such a lively and naughty girl she was. Always brought me something with almonds. She used to say, ' auntie your memory is fading, eat almonds, and you shouldn't forget me ', silly girl, how can I ever forget that little girl? "
"My mom? " Zhenyi's eyes widened in shock. Was she in a parallel world? What nonsense was this old crazy woman talking about?
Not even a single person in this world described her mother the way she described.
Actually, zhenyi's mother was Zhenyi's sore point. She didn't why but whenever someone talks about her a train of unknown emotions hit her.
No one knew but she didn't even remember how her mother looked like. neither she was allowed to look at and not she ever tried to look at her.
And why it was so, it was a story of another day.
Acknowledging the fact that she was serious, Zhenyi asked in a low whisper, "you knew my mom? "
For the first time, Zhenyi started up the topic included the forbidden word 'her mother'. And she was perplexed and shocked by the fact she actually asked.
"Knew?" the old woman scoff in a funny way and went on talking proudly, " I saw her growing in front of me. Even after marrying your father, she didn't stop visiting me despite the rivalry between the two families."
It was bizarre. How was it even possible for Long's wife to meet Xin's wife?
But when she saw the myriad emotions in her eyes, she knew it was true no matter how bizarre it sounded.
"You loved my mom." there was conviction in Zhenyi's voice followed by disbelief as to how was it possible.
"I love your mom." Grandmother Mian corrected her.
"She was best friends with my eldest son." Now, this was real bizarre. Her mother and long shaoming? Dear Lord, was she really on Earth?
"Father-in-law? " Zhenyi gaped in incredulity.
(CONGRA-FREAKIN-LATIONS.... I DID IT. I FREAKIN DID IT. HUNDRED CHAPTERS! I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD COME THIS FAR! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANKY YOU TANU FOR WRITING! YOU ARE THE BEST DO YOU KNOW! Doesn't MATTER IF YOU GET VOTES, READERS OR FEATURES, REMEBER YOU ARE WRITING FOR YOU!
ONCE AGAIN CONGRATULATIONS TO ME!
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